I once got into a bar fight with the number 1. His friends 3, 5, 7, and 9 showed up to help him.
The odds were against me.
Why can’t the number 5 perform sexually when number 1 is on top?
One of my kids ate a magnetic number off the fridge; it was the one between 1 and 3.
The doc said they would be ok “This two shall pass.”
Last night I got beat up by the numbers 1, 3, 5, 7, and 9.
I guess the odds were against me.
DJ Khaled's favorite number is 11 because it has another 1
So numbers 1 to 9 had a party but 2, 4, 6 & 8 did not turn up
Why is 1 such a lonely number?
Because people only ever say I love you too.
Windmill number 1 asked windmill number 2 “what kind of music do you listen to?” Windmill 2 responded “I’m a huge metal fan”
Which is the number 1 cereal brand in Asgard?
Bifrosties
*holy shit almost crapped my pants with excitement when I came up with this. GF not as excited, I'm counting on you guys
The other day during dinner, my 9 year old son said, "did you know there are some numbers that can only be divided by themselves and 1? Like 43."
I responded, "that is a prime example."
Choose a number between 1 and 10. Now multiply it by 2, add 3, and subtract 7. Close your eyes.
A boy climbed up onto his Dad's shoulders and started reciting numbers "1... 2... 3..." His father said "Hey! What are you doing? Get off of there..."
His son replied "Dad - don't let me down. I'm counting on you."
The number 1 in Japan must be a rash.
After I got a new leather messenger bag, my Dad asked "Do you know what the number 1 use of cow hide is?"
I'm going to get the numbers 1 through 30 tattooed up my arm.
That way people can always count on me.
I hung up the number 1 on the wall today, But to do it...
Trying hard to give up my addiction to number 1 songs..
I just need one more hit.
I think it's about time we make the number 2 pencil number 1.
It has to be the top pencil by now.
A psychologist, a pterodactyl and a psychic all go to the toilet for a number 1.
number 1 dad joke
kid : Im hungry
dad: hi hungry im dad
kid:dad im serious im hungry
dad: and im serious too hungry my names dad
I challenged number 1 to a fight
He bought he friends 3,5,7 and 9.
The odds were against me.
I challenged number 1 to a fight, but he bought his friends 3, 5, 7, and 9
I challenged the number 1 to a fight, but he brought his friends 3, 5, 7, and 9.
The odds were against me.
I challenged the number 1 to a fight,
but he brought his friends 3, 5, 7, and 9.
The odds were against me.
I challenged the number 1 to a fight, but he brought his friends 3, 5, 7 and 9.
The odds were against me.
This week’s winning lottery numbers are 1, 3, 5, 7 and 9.
I mean, what are the odds?
“Think of a number between 1 and 10. Multiply by 7. Add 2. Now close your eyes.”
The number 1 is my least favorite number.
My dad's number 1 dad joke...
"Dad, I'm hungry."
"Hi hungry, I'm dad. Nice to meet you."
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