I gave my french girlfriend a pendant with "le monde" carved in.

It means the world to her.

👍︎ 6
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📅︎ Jan 05 2021
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My 7 year old dadjoked me

Me: We've got to get almonds from the store. My boy: Can't we just get some monds? We don't need them all.

I take this as a sign I have raised him well.

👍︎ 7
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📅︎ Dec 24 2013
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At the bakery

Me: I'll have an a-mond danish. Wife: You mean almond? (doesn't suspect a thing) Me: Do you know how they harvest a-monds? Wife: No. (still clueless) Me: They use a big piece of machinery to grab the tree and shake the L out of it. (Couldn't see any eye rolling because I was too busy doing a Jordan fadeaway in the very busy bakery)

👍︎ 11
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👤︎ u/8Heists
📅︎ Oct 31 2014
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