Why was the baker’s assistant fired?
Why did the wife divorce the baker?
Because he was too kneady
I've just come to the realisation that in a way a baker is technically also a parent...
Because their raisin bread.
What did the robber say to the baker?
What happens to a baker if they steal another's cream pie recipe?
They get taken into custard-y.
Why did the baker go to work?
Why did the baker have smelly hands?
What do you call an athletic baker hobbit?
For lifelong French bakers,
What do you call a Scottish baker ?
I used to date a baker
But I broke up with her because she was too kneady.
What is the result of breeding two redhead bakers?
What do you call a baker that’s part of the LGBTQ community?
The honorable baker walked into a room full of rolls
The baker said humbly, "you don't need to do that." The rolls responded:
"It's the yeast we can do."
Did you hear about the baker who started taking martial arts classes?
After only 4 weeks he was a black belt in Tae Kwon Dough
Baker: I'm sorry love, I won't be home till late. I'm doing a double shift.
Wife: But why?
Baker: I knead the dough.
A baker’s son wakes up in the hospital with no legs.
The father asked him if he was feeling sad.
The boy said no I deserved this I got too into the breadmaking and lost my cool.
The man sat back in his chair perplexed even more.
He asked him ok but why did you need them?
The boy looked confused.
Everyone needs them, to walk to run and to play.
No but why the fuck did you knead them?
Why do bakers work so hard?
Because they have a lot to prove
Why was the greedy baker unhappy and tired?
When a baker messes up a recipe
He'll whisk everything to make it right again.
When is a baker's favourite time of year?
A baker was preparing the dough for a loaf of his famous bread, while his son watched.
He slid the loaf into the oven to bake. He told his son, “This bread is for a very special occasion, so I’m going to make a back-up.” He then plopped an extra loaf’s worth of dough onto the table, sliced it into two equal pieces, and immediately put them away. The boy asked, “Dad, why’d you do that?” The baker smiled and told his son, “It’s better to halve it and not knead it.”
Do you know where does the baker sleep
I lost my baker's license
because I was recently charged with batter-y
In addition to being a pacifist, Gandhi was a baker.
Because of this, he made a lot of Naan-violence.
How does the German baker greet his customers?
Why did the baker rob the bank?
Because bakers knead dough!
What was the prize the baker won for winning the bread contest?
Why was the baker upset with himself?
Why was the baker such a good comedian?
Because he had such a rye sense of humor
Whats a bakers favourite joke
Why did the baker rob a bank?
Because he kneaded the dough.
My neighborhood baker is always complaining.
What did the baker call his son when he baked muffins instead of scones?
My Indian baker quit so I had no one to make flatbread!
What do you call an Irish Baker?
What did the German baker say when he greeted people
What does the German baker say to his customers when they enter his shop?
What kind of shoes do bakers wear?
I heard the bakers parents were also bakers.
You could say he was bread for the job.
What did the Nazi baker say to the Celiac?
Whats the difference between a baker, and someone who is addicted to watching 'The Simpsons'?
One kneed's Dough, and the other needs Doh!
How do bakers feel about their dough?
Why was the French baker crying?
Good bakers use real butter so that there is no margarine for error.
A baker gave me some sweetbread
What did the baker say to the dough?
Our local baker is very affluent!
He's rolling in dough, but I guess he kneads it to feel successful!
I went down to the bread shop and ordered. The baker threw it at me!
He said I wanted a plane bagel!
I said to the baker “ how come all your cakes are 50p and that one is £1?”
He said “ that one is Madeira cake”
What kind of shoes does a baker wear?
Bakers don't like themselves very much.
They are known to be self loafing
Why are French bakers the toughest?
They're used to dealing with pain every day.
What did the baker say to the teller while robbing the bank?
“Sorry, but I knead the dough!”
Being a baker in France is really frustrating
What do you call a French bakers' favorite flower?
How do two German Bakers greet each other?
Before the 1st i feel like a baker
I accused my baker son of not achieving anything..
He stood up and said “you breader believe I’m not loafing around, I’m on a roll!”
Why did a baker ask their boss for a raise ?
Because they need the dough
There was once a baker who was secretly dating two women.
Their names were Edith and Kate. And neither one knew of the other.
The baker loved them both, but couldn't decide on who to remain loyal to.
When the women found out about their shared man, rather than fight, they decided to compromise.
The baker was thrilled because he finally could have his Kate and Edith too.
My grandfather was a baker in the army.
He went in all buns glazing.
What did the baker say when he used both turkey and chicken together?
Killing two birds with one scone
How do german bakers greet each other in the morning?
I walked past a bakers who had a cake sale on.
I went in and I asked “how come all these cakes are 50p and this one is £1?”
Baker replied: “That’s Madeira cake.”
My grandad was a Baker before he went into the army, he went in all buns glazing
Why did the baker stop making donuts?
He was fed up with the hole thing!
Did you hear about the baker that stopped making donuts?
He got tired of the hole thing
I wanted to be a baker
But I couldn't raise the dough
What do you call a baker giving out free desserts?
A terrible businessman, but he considers it pie-lanthropy
How did the German baker greet his customers every morning?
I can understand why French bakers hate me.
Why didn't the Indian baker make sourdough bread?
Why did the baker have brown hands?
Why did the baker have brown palms?
Because he kneaded a poop!
What did the mute baker say?
Why was the baker arrested for selling German cake?
Why do you call a red headed baker?
Never date a baker!
They're way too kneady...
Why are bakers in France always in agony?
Because to the French, bread is pain.
I said to the baker “how come all your cakes are 50p but that one is £1?”
He said “that’s Madeira cake”
What did the German say to the baker?