A Little Town In Mexico And Their Love Of Mayonnaise

There was a little town in Mexico, right across the border from Texas. They got a taste for Mayonnaise from the Cowboys crossing the border to eat. Soon they created a festival for their love of Mayonnaise. They’d have every type of mayonnaise you could think of. Folks loved it. The 10th anniversary of the festival was coming up and they decided they wanted to do something special. They heard of a place in England that made the worlds very best. They placed their order and was told it would be shipped overseas to them by boat. Because they had placed such a large order, the only ship capable of carrying it was the Titanic. The folks were waiting excitedly until the morning that the Titanic had hit a iceberg. When the news came that they wouldn’t get their shipment and to honor those lives lost, they decided to rename their festival. It became known as β€œSinko De Mayo.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedDirtCountryBoy
πŸ“…︎ May 05
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I got attacked the other day by two guys when they threw a bottle of mayonnaise at me.

I was in so much shock all I could retaliate with was "what the Hellmann's"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RodimusMajor84
πŸ“…︎ May 10
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Someone just threw a jar of mayonnaise at me!

What the Hellman?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Texgymratdad
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16
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What do you call a funny jar of mayonnaise?

LMAYO

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 27
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I saw another coworker using the mayonnaise with my name on it from the fridge in the break room.

I said to him, β€œWhat the Hellman?”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ggfchl
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10
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what do you call a laughing mayonnaise

lmayo

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BigLittlePenis
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09
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I recently switched from using mayonnaise to using butter for making grilled cheese sandwiches. My wife said she liked them more with the butter, but kindly asked me if it was more work this way?

I answered: "It is, but only margarinely more."

Note: this really happened.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LemonAdeAid
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
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Im gonna tell my kids that the Titanic was carrying a lot of mayonnaise

And that it sunk on the 5th of May which is why we commemorate the Sinko de Mayo

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cannedsand3
πŸ“…︎ Jan 05
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The Mayonnaise!
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Radish00
πŸ“…︎ Nov 12 2019
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What do you call a laughing jar of mayonnaise?

Lmayo

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Horses77
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
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What was invented before mayonnaise?

Aprilonnaise.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/supergush
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
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I went shopping at Coles to buy Mayonnaise, but they said it was illegal to buy without cabbage and carrots.

It’s Coleslaw

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πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
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Someone threw a jar of mayonnaise at me today...

...I was like, "What the hell-man?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/smdouglas2
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2020
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Whatdya call someone drowning in mayonnaise ?????????

Sinko de mayo !!!!!!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bythewater9
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2020
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What’s nicer than mayonnaise?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Norbingot
πŸ“…︎ May 01 2020
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Just caught my kid eating mayonnaise out of the jar...

What the hellman?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TomWaah
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2020
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My mayonnaise is trying kill me

or so my sauces tell me.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2020
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Why didn't the mayonnaise want to go back in the fridge?

Because it saw the salad dressing

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Scottlebutt
πŸ“…︎ Apr 22 2020
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Apparently if you buy cabbage from coles supermarkets you are legally obligated to buy carrots and mayonnaise

They call it, Coles law

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πŸ‘€︎ u/StarvedAsian
πŸ“…︎ Jan 14 2020
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Mayonnaise a lot of good puns in this sub.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/coadnamedalex
πŸ“…︎ Dec 10 2018
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We should enjoy Mayonnaise while we still can!

From Saturday onwards, it's gonna be Juneonnaise!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/BigDisk
πŸ“…︎ May 29 2019
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How do you call a cockney garlic mayonnaise?

An oi-oli.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MiKeseMiCasa
πŸ“…︎ Oct 28 2019
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I have a joke about mayonnaise!

Ugh never mind. You might spread it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/maybnfc
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2019
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Everyone knows that Old King Cole was a merry old soul, but few know about his mandate that all his subjects had to eat cabbage and mayonnaise

It was Cole's Law.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fragglet
πŸ“…︎ May 07 2019
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What is the scientific principle which describes the movement of cabbage in mayonnaise

Cole’s Law

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Scorpoll
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2019
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Making mayonnaise is hard work.

Some would even call it egg-sauce-ting.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
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What’s the Devil’s favorite brand of Mayonnaise?

Hellman’s

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πŸ‘€︎ u/HoobaDooba420
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2019
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My 4 y.o. was eating a bit of mayonnaise that fell out of her sandwich ...

... and she goes "Dad, this is mayonazing!".

I couldn't be more proud :]

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dannyk6
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2017
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I dropped my phone in mayonnaise today,

What the Hellman

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πŸ‘€︎ u/eprocket
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2018
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Too late I realized the new jar of discount mayonnaise felt light. When I opened it up the pristine surface collapsed into a large air pocket.

Yes it was a sinkhole de mayo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JazzboTN
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2018
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I went to Cole's this morning to buy cabbage, apparently its a legal requirement for me to also purchase carrots and mayonnaise when purchasing cabbage.

It's Cole's Law.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eng69
πŸ“…︎ Sep 13 2018
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Most people don't know that back in 1912, Hellmann's mayonnaise was manufactured in England...

In fact, the Titanic was carrying 12,000 jars of the condiment scheduled for delivery in Vera Cruz, Mexico, which was to be the next port of call for the great ship after its stop in New York . This would have been the largest single shipment of mayonnaise ever delivered to Mexico. The Mexican people loved Mayonnaise so much and this loss was so devastating that the Mexican people declared a National day of Mourning which happens every year on the day the shipment was supposed to arrive. This day of course is May 5th or more commonly known as Sinko de Mayo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lucy_dogg90210
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2017
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Mexicans love mayonnaise

In fact, back in 1912 the Titanic was loaded with 1000 cases of mayonnaise that were to be delivered to Mexico after the ship briefly stopped in New York. But as we all know, the ship hit an iceberg and sank. The Mexican people were so sad they created a special day to honor the event. Sinko de Mayo.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jsushe01
πŸ“…︎ Feb 15 2017
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Hey have you heard about Steven Tyler's new line of sweetened mayonnaise?

No? Well maybe you've heard the jingle "Sweet Emulsion."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FancySkunk
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2017
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Does anyone else here eat vanilla pudding out of a mayonnaise jar?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Boom223
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2018
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What did the mayonnaise say to the refrigerator?

Close the door, I’m dressing!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/smjb
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2017
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I have just spilt mayonnaise down my shirt...

Fucking HELLMANS

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DankBronson
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09 2017
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WHY IS MY SINK FILLED WITH MAYONNAISE?

Sinko de Mayo

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tnethacker
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2015
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My mayonnaise is trying kill me...

...or so my sauces tell me...

πŸ‘︎ 239
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2018
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What do you call a laughing jar of mayonnaise?

Lmayo

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrMorlonelycat
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2015
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