Someone threw a jar of mayo at me!

What the Hellman?!?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bradb717
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
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My new horse’s name is Mayo.

Mayo neighs.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rob_Haggis
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2020
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I got a horse named Mayo

and Mayo neighs

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πŸ‘€︎ u/allisongibson
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2020
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I ordered my burger with no mayo.

When I took my first bite I said, β€œWhat the Hell Mann?!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/xeazlouro
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2020
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Someone spilled mayo all over me

I was like what the Hellmann!?!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Spicoli0525
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
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Sauces tell me that you mayo die of laughter at this pun
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πŸ‘€︎ u/i_like_miniwheats
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2020
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Happy sink of the Mayo
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πŸ‘€︎ u/veknilero
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
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Someone threw a bottle of mayo at me!

I was like what the Helman!!!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Whlightning
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
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Hold the Mayo..
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MilPens
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2020
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If you were treated at the Mayo Clinic

for mustard gas exposure, would you ever catch up to previous health levels?

Food for thought

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πŸ‘€︎ u/rqstewart
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2020
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Sorry I’m late for cinco de Mayo. What do you call churros that have sat out on your counter all day?

Room tempera-churros.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Discount_Dracula
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2020
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Following instructions to make mayo

Teacher: -So, add sunflower oil and stir

Me: -Hmm, I didn't quite understand that. I guess I'll ketchup later!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Davis_Schina
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2020
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Why is Mrs Mayo mad at Mr Ketchup?

She caught him watching the salad dressing again.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/breakone9r
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2020
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Mayo neighs
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πŸ‘€︎ u/recnemorcen
πŸ“…︎ Jan 29 2019
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I don’t want mayo thanks
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rockerpoem
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2019
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Any left over cabbage shall be shredded and mixed with mayo!

-Cole’s Law

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πŸ‘€︎ u/browserleet
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2019
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The amount of cabbage is directly proportional to the square root of the carrots divided by the volume of the Mayo.

That’s Cole’s Law.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2019
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What do birds eat on Cinco de Mayo?

squackamole.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ram3nbar
πŸ“…︎ May 03 2019
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Mom to Dad: Please bring the mayo, but check if it hasn't gone bad

Dad looking for mayo: I think its gone rogue

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Juris_B
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2019
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I HATE Cinco de Mayo!!

Said No Juan Ever.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mintyporkchop
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2018
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Happy Sinko de Mayo!
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ElderCunningham
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2016
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It's Cinco de Mayo

The one day a year I wipe off mayo into the sink.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/breedweezy
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2019
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Every time I have cabbage I'm out of mayo, and every time I have mayo I'm out of cabbage. It's like some kind of Murphy's Slaw.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rawlingstones
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2016
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I don’t celebrate Cinco de Mayo, but I do celebrate Seis de Mustard.
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πŸ“…︎ May 05 2018
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I have discovered the optimal ratio of cabbage to mayo!

And I shall name it Cole's law

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dretland
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2017
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Happy Sinko de Mayo
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SnowyBox
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2015
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Why do we celebrate Cinco de Mayo?

https://i.redd.it/g9jsxzwnmvg01.jpg

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πŸ‘€︎ u/billythepilgrim
πŸ“…︎ Feb 18 2018
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How do SWAT teams celebrate Cinco de Mayo?

With Tac-taco rations

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PaxPaw
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2018
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Cinco de Mayo
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dogeislord3637
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2014
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Cinco de Mayo

When I was growing up I asked my dad what Cinco de Mayo was about. He said it was Mexico's version of the Boston Tea Party, where they threw mayo off a ship and people were yelling "sink-o de mayo!"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/justkayla
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2013
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I ordered a liver sandwich from a local deli and all I got was 2 slices of bread with mayo on it.

It was delivered.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Calthropstu
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2017
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My dad would like to celebrate Cinco de Mayo with you all!

http://imgur.com/E0Shp1O

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoystickMonkey
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2016
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Cinco de Mayo

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Smy7OjDF6x8

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πŸ‘€︎ u/spursfan20
πŸ“…︎ May 04 2015
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I named my horse Mayo.

Mayo Neighs

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πŸ‘€︎ u/qu1etus
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2019
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Spotted this Cinco de Mayo dad joke on Facebook

http://imgur.com/JQdspcn

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πŸ‘€︎ u/couchparsnip
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2014
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My dad just posted this on Facebook for Cinco de mayo

Typical dad... http://imgur.com/EpqV8jr

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/brandmaster
πŸ“…︎ May 05 2014
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