If you wear cowboy clothes are you ranch dressing?
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︎ Nov 20 2020
My wife told me to stop cross dressing.
So I packed her things and left.
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︎ Sep 29 2020
Salad dressing
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︎ Nov 02 2020
I thought about dressing up as a plank of wood for halloween
I changed my mind because i would get board quickly.
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︎ Oct 23 2020
What do you call a cross dressing vampire ?
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︎ Dec 01 2020
The way kids are dressing these days makes me think they all have COVID-19...
...they obviously have no taste.
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︎ Nov 28 2020
Field Dressing
Hey guys, relatively new dad here. Pretty proud of myself because this came naturally. My 7 mo daughter, wife and I were hiking yesterday. My daughter was strapped to the front of me, and she started to stink. We found a field to lay her on her changing mat and change her diaper. She had a complete explosion so it required an outfit change. I looked up at my wife and said βlooks like Iβll be performing a field dressingβ. Corny af I know, but it made my wife laugh π!
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︎ Oct 02 2020
A lot of people like French dressing, but my favorite salad dressing is Irish
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︎ Nov 21 2020
This Halloween I'm dressing up as something really scary....
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︎ Oct 29 2020
I remember dressing up as a breakfast pastry for one of my high school plays.
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︎ Aug 21 2020
My friends and I tried to bypass the quarantine laws by dressing up as crows and hanging out together on top of a telephone wire
Unfortunately, someone called the police on us and we got arrested for attempted murder.
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︎ May 12 2020
Me: Whatβs the cowboys favorite salad dressing?
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︎ Jul 07 2020
Checking out your butt in a dressing room is just you looking through a rear-view mirror.
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︎ Nov 26 2019
The local drug dealer in town started dressing as a Jehovahβs Witness so as not to arouse suspicion.
He was arrested when cops saw people actually letting him in.
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︎ Sep 03 2018
It had his favourite dressing on it too
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︎ Aug 12 2019
what if I told you that cowboy clothes is just a fancy way of sayin ranch dressing?
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︎ Aug 23 2019
Making a sign for work. Any puns for thousand island dressing?
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︎ Aug 18 2019
What is the most communist dressing?
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︎ Jan 18 2020
My wife saw me dressing in drag, and now she decided that we were over.
So I packed up her stuff and left.
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︎ Aug 08 2019
I enjoy dressing up.
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︎ Sep 08 2019
For Halloween this year Iβm dressing up as Santa and handing out White Clawβs
Iβm gonna be Santa Claws
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︎ Aug 02 2019
I bought a dressing gown.
I always wear it when putting sauce on a salad.
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︎ Aug 31 2019
My wife got mad at me for kicking the dropped ice cubes under the refrigerator. Then told me I was terrible with directions. And then she added that I should stop cross dressing in her clothes. She also didn't like the female neighbor sun bathing nude in her backyard.
I nearly shit her pants, even though the ice-incident was water under the fridge! I was on the fence about the neighbor sun-bathing nude, but I packed her things and right anyway.
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︎ Mar 09 2019
Dressing to impress
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︎ May 16 2017
In honor of the 10 year anniversary of Michael Jackson's death, Kraft foods has krafted up a new salad dressing.
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︎ Jun 25 2019
I always knock on the refrigerator door before I open it; just in case there's a salad dressing
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︎ Feb 24 2019
I've no problem with people dressing up as a red vegetable, as long as you beetroot to yourself.
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︎ Oct 09 2018
Like /u/jgudnas, my wife also caught me cross dressing
She told me to lighten up.
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︎ Mar 08 2019
I've been banned from the nudist beach for dressing inappropriately
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︎ Dec 23 2018
I like dressing classy
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︎ Nov 18 2018
Where do turkeys go to buy their dressings?
Old Gravy.
(Day late sorry)
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︎ Nov 24 2018
My buddy is a math teacher, and says for Halloween he is dressing up as a tree...
When his students ask him what he is, he's going to say, "Gee, I'm a tree." (Geometry)
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︎ Oct 31 2016
The conceited actress was given a fancy trailer and liked to show off her dressing table
Her full vanity was on display
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︎ Nov 19 2018
I've been battling a serious addiction to dressing like a nun for years. Today I'm happy to announce that I'm 28 days clean.
I've finally kicked the habit.
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︎ May 02 2017
Please pass the dressing
I'm not sure if I can, are you covered with my insur-ranch?
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︎ Mar 19 2017
My friend just told me that for Halloween, he's dressing up as the Archipelago off the southwest coast of Britain....
I said, don't be so scilly.
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︎ Oct 04 2015
My wife caught me cross dressing and told me it was over.
So I packed all her clothes and left.
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︎ Mar 07 2019
My wife caught me cross dressing today and said we're finished
So I packed her clothes and left
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︎ Mar 12 2019
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