If you wear cowboy clothes are you ranch dressing?
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︎ Feb 16 2021
My wife told me to stop cross dressing.
So I packed her things and left.
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︎ Sep 29 2020
Salad dressing
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︎ Nov 02 2020
Stop calling it dressing, you donβt wear it. Itβs stuffing.
Because youβre stuffing your face with it since you know you wonβt see it again until next Thanksgiving.
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︎ Nov 26 2020
I thought about dressing up as a plank of wood for halloween
I changed my mind because i would get board quickly.
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︎ Oct 23 2020
Field Dressing
Hey guys, relatively new dad here. Pretty proud of myself because this came naturally. My 7 mo daughter, wife and I were hiking yesterday. My daughter was strapped to the front of me, and she started to stink. We found a field to lay her on her changing mat and change her diaper. She had a complete explosion so it required an outfit change. I looked up at my wife and said βlooks like Iβll be performing a field dressingβ. Corny af I know, but it made my wife laugh π!
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︎ Oct 02 2020
The way kids are dressing these days makes me think they all have COVID-19...
...they obviously have no taste.
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︎ Nov 28 2020
What do you call a cross dressing vampire ?
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︎ Dec 01 2020
A lot of people like French dressing, but my favorite salad dressing is Irish
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︎ Nov 21 2020
This Halloween I'm dressing up as something really scary....
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︎ Oct 29 2020
My friends and I tried to bypass the quarantine laws by dressing up as crows and hanging out together on top of a telephone wire
Unfortunately, someone called the police on us and we got arrested for attempted murder.
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︎ May 12 2020
I remember dressing up as a breakfast pastry for one of my high school plays.
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︎ Aug 21 2020
Me: Whatβs the cowboys favorite salad dressing?
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︎ Jul 07 2020
The local drug dealer in town started dressing as a Jehovahβs Witness so as not to arouse suspicion.
He was arrested when cops saw people actually letting him in.
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︎ Sep 03 2018
Checking out your butt in a dressing room is just you looking through a rear-view mirror.
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︎ Nov 26 2019
It had his favourite dressing on it too
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︎ Aug 12 2019
what if I told you that cowboy clothes is just a fancy way of sayin ranch dressing?
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︎ Aug 23 2019
Making a sign for work. Any puns for thousand island dressing?
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︎ Aug 18 2019
What is the most communist dressing?
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︎ Jan 18 2020
My wife saw me dressing in drag, and now she decided that we were over.
So I packed up her stuff and left.
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︎ Aug 08 2019
I enjoy dressing up.
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︎ Sep 08 2019
For Halloween this year Iβm dressing up as Santa and handing out White Clawβs
Iβm gonna be Santa Claws
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︎ Aug 02 2019
I bought a dressing gown.
I always wear it when putting sauce on a salad.
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︎ Aug 31 2019
My wife got mad at me for kicking the dropped ice cubes under the refrigerator. Then told me I was terrible with directions. And then she added that I should stop cross dressing in her clothes. She also didn't like the female neighbor sun bathing nude in her backyard.
I nearly shit her pants, even though the ice-incident was water under the fridge! I was on the fence about the neighbor sun-bathing nude, but I packed her things and right anyway.
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︎ Mar 09 2019
Dressing to impress
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︎ May 16 2017
In honor of the 10 year anniversary of Michael Jackson's death, Kraft foods has krafted up a new salad dressing.
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︎ Jun 25 2019
I always knock on the refrigerator door before I open it; just in case there's a salad dressing
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︎ Feb 24 2019
I've no problem with people dressing up as a red vegetable, as long as you beetroot to yourself.
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︎ Oct 09 2018
Like /u/jgudnas, my wife also caught me cross dressing
She told me to lighten up.
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︎ Mar 08 2019
I like dressing classy
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︎ Nov 18 2018
I've been banned from the nudist beach for dressing inappropriately
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︎ Dec 23 2018
My buddy is a math teacher, and says for Halloween he is dressing up as a tree...
When his students ask him what he is, he's going to say, "Gee, I'm a tree." (Geometry)
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︎ Oct 31 2016
Where do turkeys go to buy their dressings?
Old Gravy.
(Day late sorry)
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︎ Nov 24 2018
The conceited actress was given a fancy trailer and liked to show off her dressing table
Her full vanity was on display
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︎ Nov 19 2018
I've been battling a serious addiction to dressing like a nun for years. Today I'm happy to announce that I'm 28 days clean.
I've finally kicked the habit.
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︎ May 02 2017
Please pass the dressing
I'm not sure if I can, are you covered with my insur-ranch?
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︎ Mar 19 2017
If you wear cowboy clothes are you ranch dressing?
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︎ Nov 20 2020
My wife caught me cross dressing and told me it was over.
So I packed all her clothes and left.
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︎ Mar 07 2019
My wife caught me cross dressing today and said we're finished
So I packed her clothes and left
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︎ Mar 12 2019
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