Missed the World Hairdressing Championships on TV last night....

Anyone know if there's a highlight program?

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Twigsnapper
πŸ“…︎ Mar 14 2019
🚨︎ report
I f#cking love a hairdresser pun!
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Charrun
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2018
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What is a hairdressers favourite food?

Barber-que

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/4wwn4h
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2020
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Hairdressers are the most corrupt breed...

They're always making shortcuts

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Persons1001
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2020
🚨︎ report
What would Dory say if she was a hairdresser?

Just keep trimming~

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_kimbers
πŸ“…︎ Jun 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Good pickup line to use at the hairdresser's...

"...excuse me miss, do you comb hair often?"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Every time my wife gets her hair coloured at the hairdresser’s, she records it on her phone.

I think she watches the highlights later.

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2020
🚨︎ report
We will never run out of puns now!

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweepi

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/communist_scumbag
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
A Jamaican man has stormed into my hairdressers and demanded I give him a new style

I'm dreading it

πŸ‘︎ 403
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GaryTheKnight
πŸ“…︎ Aug 01 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife is quitting her job as a hairdresser to become a police officer.

You know what they say: β€œHair today, gun tomorrow.”

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2019
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My wife always records her haircut on her phone when she goes to the hairdressers.

I think she watches the highlights later.

πŸ‘︎ 25
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 03 2019
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Why are hairdressers suicidal?

They just want to dye.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/skylly100
πŸ“…︎ Dec 12 2019
🚨︎ report
What hairstyle did Moses get at the hairdressers?

A middle parting.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2019
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what does a hairdresser say when she murders someone

DYE DYE DYE!

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sleepcow
πŸ“…︎ Jun 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Why are some hairdressers gay?

Because their straighteners are broke.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dens382
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2019
🚨︎ report
The person at the hairdressers asked me, "Are you braiding that girl's hair whilst dyeing it silver?"

I said, "No, platinum"

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/GaryTheKnight
πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a German hairdresser

Herr cut

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Feindish2
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13 2019
🚨︎ report
What's the name of the Sun God's Hairdresser?

Barber Ra

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/paperarrow
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Start my new job as a hairdresser in Jamaica tomorrow.

I'm dreading it.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/brendenmefford
πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2018
🚨︎ report
The hairdresser said she needed to cut my hair wet.

I don't know why she had to be aroused.

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Jul 21 2018
🚨︎ report
The hairdresser showed me a beautiful hair color and also warned me that the chemical is toxic.

I asked him to apply it anyways.

It's worth dyeing for.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sodomicity
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2019
🚨︎ report
"How much do you want off the back?" asked the hairdresser.

"None," I replied. "Only my head."

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2018
🚨︎ report
A gunman was just sighted near my local hairdresser.

If they come under fire I reckon their only option will be to bob and weave.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Viglek
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2018
🚨︎ report
Electrician arrested for forcing hairdressers to give their clients mohawks

victims say it was a shocking, hair-raising experience

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ppoong
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2018
🚨︎ report
"Can you cut my hair like Elvis Presley, please?" I asked the hairdresser.

He said, "Uhuh."

I said, "Thank you very much."

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2018
🚨︎ report
What do you call a Nazi hairdresser?

A Herr Schnipp...

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/XLeoInTheDarkX
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2016
🚨︎ report
My hairdresser always brings their dog to work.

It's a Shampoodle.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LMUK
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2018
🚨︎ report
I once won silver for curling and bronze for the Bob

...yet hairdresser of year still eludes me.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rav4xle
πŸ“…︎ May 23 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a pillaging hairdresser?

A barberian!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iphie287
πŸ“…︎ Apr 19 2016
🚨︎ report
Managed to sneak in a good one at the hairdressers today!

So as the hairdresser was walking past a school boy he caught his foot on the guys rucksack and nearly tripped.

I murmured "That was a close shave."

The school boy looked at me, looked away and started to shake his head, while me and the hairdresser are grinning away...

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AjGoudie
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2013
🚨︎ report
Why was the woman's hair crying?

The hairdresser was teasing it!

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Payasin70
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2019
🚨︎ report
After having my long hair for the last few years, I finally had most of it cut off

Friends and family seeing my new hair cut for the first time have all asked me the same question:

"Oh, you cut your hair off?"

"No", I respond. I let them struggle with an internal dilemma, doubting reality, wondering if they were losing touch life, until I finally respond, "My hairdresser cut it off."

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lovethebacon
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2015
🚨︎ report
A family friend named Lance brought some fatherly flavour to my parents' last Christmas party

[my parents bickering like a married couple] My mom: don't get snippy! Lance: my hairdresser gets a bit snippy sometimes

Everyone else: good lord that was majestic

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2013
🚨︎ report
Negativity joke from my dad. (as emailed)

A woman was at her hairdresser's getting her hair styled for a trip
to Rome with her husband..

She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded: " Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded and dirty.
You're crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there?"

"We're taking Continental," was the reply. "We got a great rate!"

"Continental?" exclaimed the hairdresser. "That's a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and they're always late.
So, where are you staying in Rome?"

"We'll be at this exclusive little place over on Rome's Tiber River called Teste."

"Don't go any further. I know that place. Everybody thinks it's going to be something special and exclusive, but it's really a dump."

"We're going to go to see the Vatican and maybe get to see the Pope."

"That's rich," laughed the hairdresser. "You and a million other people trying to see him. He'll look the size of an ant. Boy, good luck on this

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/joe630
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2014
🚨︎ report
A giant list of puns from r/copypasta

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweepi

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2020
🚨︎ report
514 Dad Jokes

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. It’s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind it’s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I don’t think it’s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

There’s a new type of broom out, it’

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 75
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Josvys
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2019
🚨︎ report

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