...just in case I get a hole in one.
In case you get a hole in one
In case I got a hole in one
I guess “hole-in-one” jokes are sub-par.
Last time I got a hole in one
A man swings his club and fails to hit the ball.
Man: God damnit, I missed.
A nun shakes her head in disapproval. The man swings again and misses yet again
Man: Damnit, I missed again!
Nun: Sir, if you keep on swearing like that, you're gonna go to hell.
The man then laughs and dismisses the nun's comment. He makes one more attempt at hitting the ball, but to no avail.
Man: God fucking damnit!
The sky then goes dark, a lightning bolt strikes the nun, and you can hear a thundery voice say, "God damnit, I missed."
In case I get a hole in one.
It's just in case I get a hole in one.
It was a foursome... Al, Jerry and Gerry. To ease confusion, we just call the (G)Jerry’s by the first letter of their name... so Jay and Gee.
Anyways, we were playing the other day and I could tell that someone was wearing cologne. Why on a golf course? I don’t know.
Now I’m kinda sensitive to odors and aromas and, sure enough, after a few holes, my eyes start to water and I start to sneeze.
I turn to Jay and say “I think I’m allergic to someone’s cologne”
Jay responds, “Hmmm, I’m not wearing cologne, it must be Al or Gee’s”
But I stormed off the course when I realized she was trying to drive a wedge between us.
A buddy of mine and I went golfing the other day, and while we both were doing fairly well on the main stretch, his approach when using his 9 iron was always awful. I felt bad for him, so the next time we went golfing, I brought him some pills I thought would, give him some "help".
"What're these for?" he asked.
I replied, "for your Iron deficiency!"
I lacked the drive."
Got a little high and went golfing. Was kicked off the course for taking too long putting. They said, "too much time on the green'.
Good thing since I got a hole in one.
My dad and I went galling this morming, and a flock of birds was sitting on the fairway of the third hole as we got to the tee box. I asked him how many strokes we would get off our score if we hit a bird.
As he stepped up to address the ball, he said calmly "It's an automatic birdie."
Dad loves to golf and he enjoys drinking while golfing. A couple days ago he came over for a visit after a few rounds.
"How was golfing? You seem a little buzzed, did you have a few drinks?"
"Of golf course!"
.....
I cracked up but my husband groaned.
The turtle that was swimming there swam away, frightened. Guess he was shell shocked.
My dad who is an avid golfer steps up to the first tee today and says "You know why they call me BMW?"
Me: Why?
He proceeds to crush his drive down the middle of the fairway and says "because I'm the ultimate driving machine".
... His drive went straight into the woods, bounced off a tree limb, and ended up right in the middle of the fairway.
I said, "Nice bounce."
He said, "Nah, that was my Irish caddy: Rick O'Shea."
My dad tees off and the ball hooks right into the trees. We try to find it but can't...
"I think it's lost in the woods, dad."
"Welp... Guess next spring a new golf ball tree will be sproutin..."
...and my friend got an Eagle. He turns around, very excited and says, "How do ya like that?" So I told him, "Eagles are sub-par."
In case I get a hole in one.
In case I get a hole in one
In case I get a hole in one
Just in case I get a hole in one
Just in case you get a hole in one.
Just in case you get a hole in one.
Just incase they get a hole in one.
Just in case you get a hole in one.
Just in case you get a hole in one.
Just in case you get a hole in one.
In case you get a hole in one!
Just in case he has a hole in one
In case I get a hole in one
In case I get a hole in one
In case you get a hole in one.
In case I get a hole in one.
Dad: you should bring two pairs of pants with you when you golfing tomorrow
Me: why?
Dad: in case you get a hole in one
In case I get a hole in one.
Just in case I get a hole in one.
Just in case I get a hole in one.
Just in case you get a hole in one!
