Two prawns were swimming around in the sea

One called Justin and the other called Kristian. The prawns were constantly being harassed and threatened by sharks that inhabited the area:

Finally one day Justin said to Kristian. "I'm fed up with being a prawn. I wish I was a shark and then I wouldn't have any worries about being eaten."

A large mysterious cod appeared and said. "Your wish is granted" Low and behold, Justin turned into a shark. Horrified, Kristian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his old mate.

Time passed (as it does) and Justin found life as a shark boring and lonely All his old mates simply swam away whenever he came close to them. Justin didn't realise that his new menacing appearance was the cause of his sad plight.

While swimming alone one day he saw the mysterious cod again and he thought perhaps the mysterious fish could change him back into a prawn..

He approached the cod and begged to be changed back, and, lo and behold, he found himself turned back into a prawn.

With tears of joy in his tiny little eyes Justin swam to Kristian's home. As he opened the coral gate, memories came flooding back. He banged on the door and shouted. "It's me, Justin, your old friend, come out and see me again."

Kristian replied. "No way man, you'll eat me. You're now a shark, the enemy and I'll not be tricked into being your dinner." Justin cried back. "No, I'm not. That was the old me. I've changed....... I've found Cod. I'm a Prawn again Kristian!!.. ðŸĪŠðŸĪĢ

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ðŸ‘Ī︎ u/OwenJthomas89
📅︎ Oct 17 2020
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Been home for 2 days and the jokes are flooding out of my step-dad

For example:

Mum: Your cousin is having a baby this Christmas. Step-dad: Everyone else is having turkey though. Mum: sigh

Mum: Guess what was in iceland today. Step-dad: Freezers.

The list goes on.

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ðŸ‘Ī︎ u/Tomoose08
📅︎ Dec 22 2013
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The tale of Ivan Ivanavich (Long)

There once was a man from the Ukraine named Ivan Ivanavich. Now Ivan and his family were dirt poor, in fact they were so poor, that they had to sell the cockroaches and rats they found in their hovel to make some spare change to to feed their many family members. One day, Ivan decided it was time to travel to the United States to try and have a better life and miraculously he managed to get aboard a ship to the States. Now his journey on this ship was miserable, he was down in the bowels of the ship, which was flooded with rats and feces, but he hunkered down and gave it his all to survive this terrible journey. finally, one day he hears commotion above, they had arrived at last. Ivan walks up to the topside of the old ship and sees the New York Harbor. He stands there amazed seeing such a beautiful sight. Ivan starts his life in New York but he doesn't have a significantly better life than the one he left behind. Nobody is interested in hiring immigrants but eventually he lands himself a gig of selling old newspapers. He would go through garbage cans to find old papers and would sell them to people in the poorer part of town. He makes slightly more spare change, but not really enough to live a better life. In his spare time, which he had plenty, he decides to start free diving in the bay. He goes there each day, and started to get really good at it. One day, an owner of a Circus spots him diving and is amazed at how good he is. He decides to offer Ivan a job at his circus doing performance diving. Ivan eagerly accepts and begins his career as a circus member performing amazing high jumps into really small containers of water. After a few months of doing this he suggests to the owner one amazing jump to wow everyone and put his circus on top of the entertainment world. The owner contemplates this and eventually agrees. He rents a ship much like the one Ivan arrived in and placed the smallest container yet. The radio and tv crews, journalist all arrive to spectate the event of a lifetime. The hour arrives and Ivan begins his climb up a massive lighthouse on the edge of the cliff, and the ship is positioned into place beneath him. Ivan is very nervous but decides it's go time, and jumps from the massive lighthouse. As Ivan falls, he takes perfect form heading straight towards his target. As he dives a sudden wave pushes the ship ever slightly throwing off the careful alignment. Ivan hits the deck and goes straight through the top of the ship. The spectato

... keep reading on reddit ➡

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ðŸ‘Ī︎ u/Entophreak
📅︎ Jan 31 2017
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A dad joke of flooding proportions.

Me and my brother (looking after his son) having a conversation after I got back from a short holiday.

Me: I can't get into my house at the moment...

Brother: Why not?

Me: Turns out it flooded while I was away, hot water pipes burst...

Brother: That must have dampened the mood!

Brother proceeds to move his sons mouth into a mock laughing motion as he chuckles to himself.

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ðŸ‘Ī︎ u/TatManTat
📅︎ Dec 19 2013
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My girlfriend is a dad

While driving into Phoenix, Arizona from Flagstaff, my SO pointed out an area of road that was flooded yesterday due to the monsoon rainstorms. Looking at the crew that was cleaning up the debris from the road, I simply said, "Damn."

She replied, "Yeah, they could have used one.

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ðŸ‘Ī︎ u/herbertvacuum
📅︎ Aug 20 2014
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A grave joke.

So the area around us is flooded. When my family got together for lunch, we drove by a graveyard.

Aunt: Oh dear, the graveyard is flooded! All the bodies must be swimming in water!

Dad: That's good, they don't get out much.

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ðŸ‘Ī︎ u/Clodhoppin
📅︎ Feb 24 2014
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My Dad thinks this is hilarious on so many levels...

Two prawns, Justin and Christian, were constantly harassed by sharks.

Finally Justin said to Christian, "I'm fed up being a prawn. I wish I was a shark, then I wouldn't worry about being eaten by one."

A large, mysterious cod appeared and said, "Your wish is granted", and lo and behold, Justin turned into a shark.

Horrified, Christian immediately swam away, afraid of being eaten by his former friend.

Time passed, Justin found life as a shark boring and lonely. All his old pals simply swam away whenever he came close to them.

While swimming alone one day he saw the mysterious cod again and Justin begged to be changed back to a prawn. And he was!

What a miraculous thing!

With tears of joy in his tiny little prawn-eyes, Justin swam back to his friends. But looking around the reef couldn't see his old pal.

"Where's Christian?" he asked. "He's at home, distraught at his best friend changing sides to the enemy and becoming a shark," came the reply.

Eager to put things right, Justin set off to Christian's abode. Opening its coral gate, memories came flooding back.

He banged on the door and shouted, "Christian! It's me, Justin, your old friend! Come out, and see me again!

Christian replied, "No way man, you'll eat me. You're now a shark, the enemy, and I'll not be tricked into being your dinner."

Justin cried back, "No, I'm not. That was the old me. I've changed...

"I've found Cod! I'm a prawn again Christian!"

👍︎ 84
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ðŸ‘Ī︎ u/skinnyminx
📅︎ Sep 18 2013
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