I have an addiction to unpowered flight puns, but I don't like to talk about it.

It's a soar subject.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SayLittleDoMuch
πŸ“…︎ Feb 04 2020
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How to fall down a flight of stairs

Step 1:

Step 2:

Step 4:

Step 9 :

Step 17:

Step 36:

Floor

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tubergod1
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2020
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The Captain of our flight called the cops when he saw a film crew

He heard they were there to shoot a pilot

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2020
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What did the baseball player say when the flight attendant asked what seat he was in?

Put me in coach.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KinkyWaluigi
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2020
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Flight of stairs.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dvestisorok240
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
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A vulture was boarding a plane and he brought with him a dead racoon. The flight attendant, mortified by the sight and stench, pointed at the carcass and asked "Sir why did you bring a dead racoon with you."

The vulture said. "Oh this? This is my carrion luggage."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Fearless-Gas
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2020
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I once sat next to a baby on a 10 hour flight. I had no idea that it was possible for someone to cry for 10 hours straight.

Even the baby was impressed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2020
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On a recent flight, my friend asked me, β€œIf the door suddenly opens, you think we will fall out?”

I said, β€œNo, we will still be friends.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2020
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My friend fell down a flight of steps then started looking at me without breaking eye contact...

I'm not sure why he was stairing.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2020
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Dad Flights Inc. is losing business

Some would say it’s a receding airline...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RosselWestbrook
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2020
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I have a joke about flight MH370

But I’m afraid it won’t land

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πŸ‘€︎ u/gotblake
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2020
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It wasn't too long after the Wright brothers took flight..

that pigs flew

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NoMoreTerritory
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
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There was a spider on my flight today

It was an airachnid

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thr33tard3d
πŸ“…︎ Aug 15 2020
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Long ago, a couple of dudes claimed that human flight was possible.

They were Wright.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/-taco-rice-
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2020
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If i’m scared to go on a flight, i always bring a bomb.

Because what’s the chance of being 2 bombs on 1 flight?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/MathiasMathias
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
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Last time I was on a flight, the stewardess approached me and asked, β€œSir, would you care for a drink?”

I asked her, β€œwhat are my options?”

She said, β€œyes or no.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheMikeD1
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2020
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Did you know that flight simulator game sales have increased since the outbreak?

A lot of pilots are working from home too!

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πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
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So I was on a flight the other day when they guy next to me asked me if I heard of β€œbird strikes.”

I honestly didn’t think they could hold signs.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jlionbad
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2020
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A flight to Kansas.
πŸ‘︎ 5k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2018
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The first rule of flight club...

is to take flying lessons. Also know how to read carefully.

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2018
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Apparently, if the Coronavirus outbreak gets worse, they might have to cancel all the flights in and out of John Lennon airport.

Imagine all the people.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jr1477
πŸ“…︎ Mar 05 2020
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A man caught a deadly virus while waiting for his flight at the airport

He's terminal ill

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Feddny
πŸ“…︎ Apr 21 2020
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What did the baby mosquito say after his first flight?

β€œMama, mama! Did you see that? Everyone was clapping for me!”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Leeuwe
πŸ“…︎ Jan 09 2020
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My brother has a pilot's licence but only for private flights. So, he put ads all over his plane.

Now he flies commercial.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wolfyfancylads
πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2020
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Don’t be latte for your flight
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Mafei06
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2019
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I was helping my friend move when I accidentally dropped his box of vinyl down a long flight of stairs.

The distance it fell was record breaking.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Mar 08 2020
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I pushed a chinese person down a flight of stairs

It was wong on so many levels

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sirdafiga
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2019
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Flight of Fight
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Creek217
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2019
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Dad is taking a flight today so asked my mom if he got off without a hitch

β€œYes. The hitch was too heavy to bring along.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TomBradyGoat1212
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24 2020
🚨︎ report
I just sat next to a baby on a 12 hour flight. I had no idea that someone could cry for 12 hours straight.

Even the baby seemed impressed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2019
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I was on the phone to an airline rep booking a flight.

She asked, "Window or Aisle?"

After a moment, I replied, "or you'll what?"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AllAboutGuitar
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2019
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What do you call a Korean high school girl who flights crime in spare time?

Kimchi Possible, obviously

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ArthurRanpo
πŸ“…︎ Nov 01 2019
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Why were the rappers late for their flight?

They forgot Tupac

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πŸ‘€︎ u/vagdryna
πŸ“…︎ Aug 28 2019
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Did you hear about the Chinese quadrublet flight pioneers?

No you didn't. Two Wongs doesn't make one Wright.

Also, edit before anyone sees this: Yes, it's spelled quadruplet. I'm mildly drunk and I can't edit the title.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thegreger
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the rooster miss its flight?

Because it forgot to chick-en.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/-Brainchild-
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2019
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Just got off a long flight home from Chernobyl

And boy are my arms legs.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/sunburnedtourist
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2017
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Why to vultures never check any bags before a flight?

They are carryon birds.

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2019
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What triggers a Spanish man's Fight or Flight response?

His-Panic.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NIRU1497
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2019
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This butter came with my in-flight meal
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πŸ‘€︎ u/weeteuchter
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2017
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My flight was delayed an hour, but we got to our destination on time.

Our pilot must have been flying.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hknewt
πŸ“…︎ Aug 27 2019
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Did you hear about the doctor on the United flight?

[removed]

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πŸ‘€︎ u/AYKW
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2018
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What do you call a Thomas Cook flight going backwards?

A receding airline.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/simplyGagi
πŸ“…︎ Sep 25 2019
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The Flight Attendant kept making jokes...

But none of them seem to have landed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OptimisticAlone
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2018
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[x-post from /r/puns] Why did the rooster miss its flight?

Because it forgot to chick-en

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πŸ‘€︎ u/-Brainchild-
πŸ“…︎ Sep 17 2019
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I never know what to do during long flights...

... they're just so Boeing

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πŸ‘€︎ u/xMZA
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2018
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I was driving to the airport to catch my flight when I saw a sign that said β€œAirport Left” so I turned around and went home.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/devnodegree
πŸ“…︎ Sep 21 2018
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I got an early flight home so I decided to surprise my wife. Got home about 10 PM. Walked in my bedroom, and to my COMPLETE surprise, there is my wife in bed with my best friend. I couldn't believe it.

I then yelled for my dog to get off the bed.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
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The first rule of flight club...

Is to take flying lessons. Also know how to read carefully.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/GodMustafi
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2019
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