I have an addiction to unpowered flight puns, but I don't like to talk about it.
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︎ Feb 04 2020
How to fall down a flight of stairs
Step 1:
Step 2:
Step 4:
Step 9 :
Step 17:
Step 36:
Floor
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︎ Dec 27 2020
The Captain of our flight called the cops when he saw a film crew
He heard they were there to shoot a pilot
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︎ Dec 31 2020
What did the baseball player say when the flight attendant asked what seat he was in?
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︎ Dec 25 2020
Flight of stairs.
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︎ Nov 08 2020
A vulture was boarding a plane and he brought with him a dead racoon. The flight attendant, mortified by the sight and stench, pointed at the carcass and asked "Sir why did you bring a dead racoon with you."
The vulture said. "Oh this? This is my carrion luggage."
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︎ Oct 18 2020
I once sat next to a baby on a 10 hour flight. I had no idea that it was possible for someone to cry for 10 hours straight.
Even the baby was impressed.
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︎ Oct 06 2020
On a recent flight, my friend asked me, βIf the door suddenly opens, you think we will fall out?β
I said, βNo, we will still be friends.β
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︎ Aug 16 2020
My friend fell down a flight of steps then started looking at me without breaking eye contact...
I'm not sure why he was stairing.
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︎ Oct 29 2020
Dad Flights Inc. is losing business
Some would say itβs a receding airline...
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︎ Sep 10 2020
I have a joke about flight MH370
But Iβm afraid it wonβt land
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︎ Aug 24 2020
It wasn't too long after the Wright brothers took flight..
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︎ Sep 23 2020
There was a spider on my flight today
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︎ Aug 15 2020
Long ago, a couple of dudes claimed that human flight was possible.
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︎ Jun 07 2020
If iβm scared to go on a flight, i always bring a bomb.
Because whatβs the chance of being 2 bombs on 1 flight?
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︎ Jul 20 2020
Last time I was on a flight, the stewardess approached me and asked, βSir, would you care for a drink?β
I asked her, βwhat are my options?β
She said, βyes or no.β
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︎ May 08 2020
Did you know that flight simulator game sales have increased since the outbreak?
A lot of pilots are working from home too!
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︎ May 26 2020
So I was on a flight the other day when they guy next to me asked me if I heard of βbird strikes.β
I honestly didnβt think they could hold signs.
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︎ Apr 21 2020
A flight to Kansas.
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︎ Sep 28 2018
The first rule of flight club...
is to take flying lessons. Also know how to read carefully.
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︎ Oct 25 2018
Apparently, if the Coronavirus outbreak gets worse, they might have to cancel all the flights in and out of John Lennon airport.
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︎ Mar 05 2020
A man caught a deadly virus while waiting for his flight at the airport
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︎ Apr 21 2020
What did the baby mosquito say after his first flight?
βMama, mama! Did you see that? Everyone was clapping for me!β
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︎ Jan 09 2020
My brother has a pilot's licence but only for private flights. So, he put ads all over his plane.
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︎ Mar 10 2020
Donβt be latte for your flight
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︎ Oct 05 2019
I was helping my friend move when I accidentally dropped his box of vinyl down a long flight of stairs.
The distance it fell was record breaking.
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︎ Mar 08 2020
I pushed a chinese person down a flight of stairs
It was wong on so many levels
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︎ Nov 05 2019
Flight of Fight
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︎ Nov 01 2019
Dad is taking a flight today so asked my mom if he got off without a hitch
βYes. The hitch was too heavy to bring along.β
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︎ Feb 24 2020
I just sat next to a baby on a 12 hour flight. I had no idea that someone could cry for 12 hours straight.
Even the baby seemed impressed.
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︎ Sep 27 2019
I was on the phone to an airline rep booking a flight.
She asked, "Window or Aisle?"
After a moment, I replied, "or you'll what?"
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︎ Nov 28 2019
What do you call a Korean high school girl who flights crime in spare time?
Kimchi Possible, obviously
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︎ Nov 01 2019
Why were the rappers late for their flight?
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︎ Aug 28 2019
Did you hear about the Chinese quadrublet flight pioneers?
No you didn't. Two Wongs doesn't make one Wright.
Also, edit before anyone sees this: Yes, it's spelled quadruplet. I'm mildly drunk and I can't edit the title.
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︎ Dec 29 2019
Why did the rooster miss its flight?
Because it forgot to chick-en.
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︎ Sep 17 2019
Just got off a long flight home from Chernobyl
And boy are my arms legs.
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︎ Dec 02 2017
Why to vultures never check any bags before a flight?
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︎ Oct 03 2019
What triggers a Spanish man's Fight or Flight response?
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︎ Mar 15 2019
This butter came with my in-flight meal
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︎ Oct 14 2017
My flight was delayed an hour, but we got to our destination on time.
Our pilot must have been flying.
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︎ Aug 27 2019
Did you hear about the doctor on the United flight?
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︎ Sep 25 2018
What do you call a Thomas Cook flight going backwards?
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︎ Sep 25 2019
The Flight Attendant kept making jokes...
But none of them seem to have landed.
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︎ Sep 21 2018
[x-post from /r/puns] Why did the rooster miss its flight?
Because it forgot to chick-en
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︎ Sep 17 2019
I never know what to do during long flights...
... they're just so Boeing
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︎ Nov 06 2018
I was driving to the airport to catch my flight when I saw a sign that said βAirport Leftβ so I turned around and went home.
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︎ Sep 21 2018
I got an early flight home so I decided to surprise my wife. Got home about 10 PM. Walked in my bedroom, and to my COMPLETE surprise, there is my wife in bed with my best friend. I couldn't believe it.
I then yelled for my dog to get off the bed.
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︎ Jun 12 2019
The first rule of flight club...
Is to take flying lessons. Also know how to read carefully.
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︎ Jul 30 2019
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