My wife and I went to a concert today and someone in the audience started clapping before the music finished. It was a case of premature adulation.
In fact, he nearly rectum
50 Cent featuring Nickelback
Band aid
Because they stole the show.
It's for all in tents and porpoises
My deaf friend: heard immunity
Because it isn't a fan
Unfortunately, due to lockdown, they had to push it
If you’re hot blooded, they’ll check it and see.
Bad idea, Heinz-Sight 2020.
Me: wow that’s disconcerting
Wouldn't Wanna Beya's
Because he was Baroque
So, she walks over and takes a seat next to him on the bench, turns to him and says, "Sorry to bother you. I know this may be a little forward but I would love to grab coffee with you some time."
Flattered, the man responds, "Sure... but what makes you so certain you and I would get along so well?"
"Well..." the woman says. "A couple things, actually. I noticed you were wearing an Iron Maiden t-shirt. Iron Maiden are my favorite band of all time. When they went on their reunion tour in 1999, my parents took me to see them in Cleveland. I was 12 years old and it was the first concert I ever went to. I absolutely love Iron Maiden."
The man can't believe it.
"I saw them play Cleveland in '99! First concert I ever went to on my own. My best friend Jimmy Spitz and I told our parents we were sleeping at each others' houses, snuck out, took a bus into the city and saw them play at the Plain Dealer Pavillion!"
Naturally, they're both shocked.
"If that isn't weird enough..." says the woman. "I noticed you're reading Mark Twain. I was a communications major in university and I actually wrote my thesis on Mark Twain and how he used satire as a lens to comment on current events of the time, comparing him to satirical news sources of today. He's my favorite author."
Now the man is really taken aback, "Get out of here! I was an English major in university! I specialized in 19th century American literature and this is like my fourth or fifth time reading Tom Sawyer, I absolutely love Mark Twain."
They both can't believe it...this has got to be a match made in heaven.
"Ok..." the woman says. "Well, buckle up because here's the icing on the cake. I noticed you're eating a prune. Prunes are my absolute favorite fruit. When I was a kid, my grandfather lived on a farm. He had an orchard that mainly grew apples and some lemons, but he knew how much my sister and I loved prunes so he kept a couple of plum trees. Every year at the end of the summer, we'd go up and harvest the plums with him. He'd dry them and by the time we'd go back to his place for Thanksgiving he'd always have those prunes saved just for us. They're my favorite fruit! I love prunes, you're eating a prune, this has got to be fate. What do you say?"
The man puts down his fruit and responds,
"It's a date!"
They're a pretty good garage band.
An operate!
Postponed Malone
Halfway through the show, the music stops and Bono stands middle stage clapping his hands every few seconds. "Every time I clap my hands, a child in Africa dies" Without missing a beat, from somewhere in the front of the crowd a man bellows out in a thick Irish accent: "Well stop fucking doing it ya evil bastard!"
I thought “wow, that’s pretty metal.”
...that the band 'Toto' was not made up of former members of the band 'Kansas'.
but I partied like it's $19.99.
They mostly wrap.
It was 50cent featuring Nickelback.
...because they are huge metal fans.
It’s a good thing his bedroom is soundproof
It is a long standing commitment.
"50 Cent featuring Nickelback!"
50 Cent featuring Nickleback.
50 Cent featuring Nickelback.
50 Cent featuring Nickelback!
50 Cent featuring Nickelback!
50 Cent featuring Nickelback
Unfortunately, due to the coronavirus they had to push it
50 cent featuring Nickelback.
50 cents featuring Nickelback
50 Cent featuring Nickleback
50 Cent and Nickelback
45 Cents.
A 50 cent and nickelback concert.
50 Cent ft. Nickelback
