Athletes get athlete's foot. What do astronauts get?

Mistletoe (missile-toe)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Wookieefaced1
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2021
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Did you know athlete’s foot is only in the US?

The rest of the world calls it athlete’s meter

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RaunchyAppleSauce
πŸ“…︎ May 18 2021
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As a huge sports statistics geek, I tend to store all my documents related to high school and collegiate athletes up high.

That way, I can keep a low pro file.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/astrosmash77
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2021
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What do you call a world class athlete who injuries their leg?

An O-limp-ian

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CrusaderTbone
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2021
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What is it called when an athlete lowers the bar...

Limbo

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πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
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Why did the athlete raise the bar in their sport?

They were tired of hitting their head

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πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
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We’re you aware that the NFL has a rule on professional athletes and the animals they can own as pets? They are prohibited from owning a duck as a pet!

It’s considered a foul

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πŸ‘€︎ u/OH-Beans
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2021
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I'm getting bored of hearing these Olympic athletes say .. 'how much work they've put in and the sacrifices they've made.'

What do they want a medal?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cotswoldboy
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2020
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What do athletes wear during winter?

Bad mittens

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mercolorecords2
πŸ“…︎ Nov 19 2020
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Potential storage loft for salaried athletes’ prosthetics is in question:

...could be pro-limb-attic!

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πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
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What's an athlete's favorite food?

Championchips

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πŸ‘€︎ u/charmandernews
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
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I learnt about the symptoms of sever athletes foot

It’s quite a peeling

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πŸ‘€︎ u/lukeurmyson
πŸ“…︎ Sep 15 2020
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I am awaiting news from my doctor to see if I have athlete's foot.

I'm on my toes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TickLikesBombs
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2020
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Why don’t athletes like traveling by train?

Too many coaches.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/adamhoolhorst
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2020
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I am a unique hybrid of two exceptional athletes. My mom was all-American sprinter and my dad qualified for the Olympic marathon.

So naturally, I have been genetically gifted with the ability to run relatively slowly over very short distances.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2020
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If an athlete tears their ACL,

They’ll probably kneed surgery.

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2019
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Who would win in a fight. Athletes or Prisoners?

It's hard to say, they have their pros and their cons.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2020
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Why did the Olympic athlete throw his reading assignment away?

His professor asked him to discus it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/StanggTwin
πŸ“…︎ Oct 02 2018
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Why did the athlete eat a lightbulb? (OC)

Because it was an electro-light!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/NoZellin
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2019
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An athlete from Finland tried to outrun the other athletes

He said he wanted to pass the Finnish line

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πŸ‘€︎ u/filthyaverage
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2019
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After a world-renowned athlete lost an important match, his wife suggested that in the future he wear a pair of her panties in his shoes for good luck to boost his confidence.

He’s been undie-feeted ever since.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/beeeeen
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2019
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Why are athletes so cool?

They have a lot of fans

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bluespider89
πŸ“…︎ Jun 21 2019
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What kind of athlete makes the best kind of neurologist?

Swimmers, because they have to learn all about strokes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/LunOverdose
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2019
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What did the athlete ask, when he lost a screw?

U sain my bolt?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sponska
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2019
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What do you call a Chinese athlete caught cheating ?

Do Ping

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Junkil
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2018
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There was some controversy in the sports world this week, when they allowed some athletes to try out for the Olympic gymnastics team more than once

I thought it was just revaulting

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πŸ‘€︎ u/The_Possum
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2017
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My friend text me that he got a new job testing athlete for doping in the next olympics. I think he’s just taking the piss.....
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πŸ‘€︎ u/feckthis
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2019
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What do British spies use to prevent athlete's foot?

Bond. Gold Bond.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dgrubbnasty
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2018
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If a Russian athlete wins in a Pyeongchang event, does that mean they're Medaling with the Olympics?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/49RedBulls
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2018
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About a year ago, my girlfriend left me for a Kenyan athlete. We remained friends, but I haven’t heard from her in a while.

I guess Lorraine’s down in Africa.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/great_red_dragon
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2018
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What do you call a boring lady with athletes foot?

Anti fun gal.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/flabden
πŸ“…︎ Dec 13 2017
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I told my friend, β€œYou should take care of your athlete’s foot.”

He said, β€œThat’s what makes me a fun guy.”

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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2018
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Why did the athlete buy discounted protein?

Because it was whey cheaper

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 06 2018
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What do you call athletes in France?

They're called Jacques.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/DystanceLambda1
πŸ“…︎ Sep 20 2018
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What do you call an Irish athlete with erectile dysfunction?

An O'Limpdick athlete.

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 23 2016
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My friend is a collegiate athlete. She said she wanted to quit swimming.

I said, "That's fine but please be careful. If you quit swimming at the wrong time, you could die."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Luke_Warmwater
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23 2016
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Which athletes keep the warmest in the winter?

The Triple-Jumpers

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πŸ‘€︎ u/RandyChristmas
πŸ“…︎ Nov 11 2017
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Who's the most famous Rasta athlete?

Tom Braidy! I'm sorry, that was dreadful.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PaxPaw
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2018
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NFL Bad Joke Telling: All the Classic DadJokes and with Athletes.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aqxBFY-M1KM

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πŸ‘€︎ u/nothumbs78
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2017
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Picked up a mild case of athlete's foot

But I treated it before it got a toe hold.

Wife's eyes almost rolled over completely when I laid that one on her.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mjbehrendt
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2016
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Why did the athlete decapitate the other athlete?

To get ahead (a head) of the competition

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πŸ‘€︎ u/StumptheTrump1
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2017
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Why did the occasional athlete run between clocks?

Because he only exercised from time to time.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/fort221
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2016
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What do you call a world class athlete who injures their leg?

An O-limp-ian!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/dirkles
πŸ“…︎ Mar 13 2021
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If athletes get athlete’s foot then what do astronauts get?

Missile toe.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/unsaneasylum
πŸ“…︎ Nov 26 2019
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If athletes get athlete’s foot, what do astronauts get?

Missile toe!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/wopper51
πŸ“…︎ Dec 18 2018
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If athletes get athletes foot, what do astronauts get?

Missle toe.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/N1NJA_CAR1B0U
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11 2018
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If athletes get althlete's foot, what do astronauts get?

Mistle toe!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Ms-Creant
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2017
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