If I could be a superhero I'd be Aluminum man...

That way I could foil crime.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/mickerallen100
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2021
🚨︎ report
What did the leftovers covered with aluminum say?

Foiled again!

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ShadeTreeMechanix
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2021
🚨︎ report
My cat kept trying to climb my Christmas tree so I put aluminum around the base of the tree.

Her plans have been foiled.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/callmefinny
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2020
🚨︎ report
What did the aluminum bandits say when they were caught?

We've been foiled.

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/xj3ewok
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2020
🚨︎ report
I tried to rob a bank but the vault was covered in a thin layer of aluminum

Needless to say, my plans were foiled

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ElizaWolf8
πŸ“…︎ Jun 19 2020
🚨︎ report
Why are all-weld aluminum boats so boring?

They have never done anything riveting.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/observer2017
πŸ“…︎ Apr 28 2020
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Aluminum foil
πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jjfan01
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2019
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What happens after you eat aluminum?

You sheet metal

πŸ‘︎ 70
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VolsungtheGreen
πŸ“…︎ Jun 27 2019
🚨︎ report
What kind of music do aluminum cans play?

Heavy Metal

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VagariTurtle
πŸ“…︎ Mar 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I went to the grocery store today, planning to steal some aluminum.

My plans were foiled by the police.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2019
🚨︎ report
I have 2 part-time jobs. For one, I put sodas into aluminum containers. For the other, I document a person's desires regarding what happens to their property after death

I can and I will.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I had to stop crushing aluminum cans for recycling.

It was soda pressing.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Newbosterone
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2019
🚨︎ report
I keep having to remind my wife & kids not to throw aluminum in the regular trash.

Their commitment to recycling is uncanny.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/casimir1978
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call burned aluminum foil?

Burnt Reynolds

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lexluthzor
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Drill sergeants like wearing aluminum hoodies.

They're full metal jackets after all.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pun-isher42
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2019
🚨︎ report
I mistakenly answer Ai instead of Al as the symbol for aluminum.

foiled again.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/buckeyespud
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2018
🚨︎ report
A coworker tried fitting an aluminum can into the paper slot of a recycling bin, and it got stuck.

I told him, "For you, they should call them aluminum can'ts."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cl350rg
πŸ“…︎ Apr 02 2018
🚨︎ report
I take two aluminum cans...

And put them behind my back. What kind of bird am I holding? A toucan

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AttaxWithImpunity
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2014
🚨︎ report
Girlfriend's dad ripped the aluminum foil: "Damn, foiled again!"
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dadosky2010
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2013
🚨︎ report
Discussing how thick aluminum cans are.

Dad: Did you know the aluminum in soda cans is thinner than a hair? Or wait, maybe it's thinner than paper.

Me: Which one is thinner?

Dad: Paper must be thinner. You get paper cuts all the time, but how often do you get hair cuts?

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Edgefactor
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2013
🚨︎ report
What happens when you eat aluminum foil?

You sheet metal.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Link_s09
πŸ“…︎ Dec 28 2019
🚨︎ report
What happens when you eat aluminum foil?

You sheet metal

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WJ_Stedback
πŸ“…︎ Aug 14 2019
🚨︎ report
What happens when you eat aluminum foil?

You sheet metal.

πŸ‘︎ 46
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RageMonster17
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2018
🚨︎ report
what happens when you eat aluminum foil?

you sheet metal.

πŸ‘︎ 28
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πŸ‘€︎ u/deadmaanposting
πŸ“…︎ May 08 2019
🚨︎ report
What happens when you eat a roll of aluminum foil?

You sheet metal.

πŸ‘︎ 36
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bigbucsnowhammies
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2019
🚨︎ report
What's happens when you eat aluminum foil?

You sheet metal

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/santafesmike
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2019
🚨︎ report
What happens when you eat a ball of aluminum foil?

You sheet metal

πŸ‘︎ 31
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Nicolaskg
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2018
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the aluminum bandit?

The police just foiled his plans.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Keauxbi
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26 2018
🚨︎ report

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