Aluminum Can Puns

It was soda pressing.

I told him, "For you, they should call them aluminum can'ts."

And put them behind my back. What kind of bird am I holding? A toucan

Dad: Did you know the aluminum in soda cans is thinner than a hair? Or wait, maybe it's thinner than paper.

Me: Which one is thinner?

Dad: Paper must be thinner. You get paper cuts all the time, but how often do you get hair cuts?

I wasn’t feeling quite like myself one day, so when she ran to me and shouted, “Aluminum!” I responded, “Can it! My plans have been foiled and I’m not in the mood to scrap.”

Aluminum cans for burned children is a charity that recycles cans and the proceeds go towards helping burn victims. It still active but not at the level it used to be that I remember in the mid/late 80s. Every time we saw or heard one of their commercials my dad would say "I wonder how many aluminum cans I would need to get a burned child "

Dad: You need to throw away the aluminum cans into a separate trash can instead of the recycling bin.

Me: Why?

Dad: Because that’s your college fund.