Cakeday post: Another Publix Packaging Pun. imgur.com/7FSMR7D
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Electronicwaffle
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2015
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Bad packaging

I recently spied a bag of gummy worms which said β€œNo Artificial Flavors”.
Which got me to wondering: who is buying gummy worms hoping they’ll tast like real worms?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheMightyViking
πŸ“…︎ May 12 2021
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Why did the C++ programmer do so well at his new job as a packaging and design engineer?

Because he was very good at orienting objects.

(Okay this is a really technical dad joke, but isn't that what they're supposed to be?)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/jarvedttudd
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2018
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My girlfriend and I were making macaroni and cheese today. Before showing her my method of re-packaging the Velveeta, I said to her...

Don’t worry, I’ve been around the block a few times in my day.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/tbdakotam
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2018
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Apparently the grammar on tobacco packaging costs money.

My friend was very annoyed about the extra he had to pay for the "syn-tax".

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πŸ‘€︎ u/shelvac2
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2016
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Does anyone want a package of dead batteries?

They're free of charge.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/bob9109
πŸ“…︎ May 24 2021
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My wife tried to buy an exotic snake on line. When the package arrived, it only contained feather scarves.

Looks like, the boa cons tricked her.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04 2021
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My friend said he got a package containing soaps from around the world...

But it was a pack of lyes.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2021
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How did the detective describe the mysterious package he received?

He said it was an open and shut case.

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πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2021
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The most important part of a mail pun, is the delivery.
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πŸ‘€︎ u/potato_patataa
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20 2021
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I just opened a package from my dad which contained canned ham.

He told me it was his first attempt at spam mail.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheFutonEng
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2021
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Hey MC Snow, your wife’s package has been delivered.

Inform her.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zedhead0628
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2021
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I was left a package this morning. On the front in big red letters it said, "PLEASE DO NOT BEND"

I thought to myself, how the f**k am I supposed to pick it up?

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
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After checking the delivery tracking app, my wife yelled in a fit of rage, β€œnow my package isn’t coming for another 5 days!”

I replied, now you know how I feel.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/zion2199
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2020
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Why do women have a difficult time working for the postal service?

It’s mail-dominated.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SecondRateHack
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2021
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Why did the Amazon package wake up in a bathtub full of ice?

Because it was de-livered.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CMoy1980
πŸ“…︎ Dec 15 2020
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I bought a package of trail mix and it only had cashews, almonds, and pistachios.

That's just nuts!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/SayLittleDoMuch
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
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I let my out of town girlfriend know her vegetable service delivered a package today and I had some bad news.

She asked what had happened to it,

I told her the box had a leek in it.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CptnBo
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2020
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The U.S. needs to stop selling pre-packaged shredded cheese!

Make America Grate Again!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/sweetmonkeylove
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2020
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My wife returned a package of pantyhose that she bought online, but they only refunded 90% of the purchase price...

...they claimed the 10% was a re-stocking fee.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12 2020
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My fiancΓ© just said this one. Me: A package came for our cat today.

FiancΓ©: Oh, I didn't realise she was ordering packages.

Me: She must've gone to the bank to get herself a debit card.

FiancΓ©: Nah, she just went to the neighbours tree.

Me: Huh?

FiancΓ©: The local branch.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Maturius
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2020
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Here’s your package

πŸ™‹β€β™€οΈThanks mailman

πŸ™‹β€β™‚οΈYou’re welcome female woman

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πŸ‘€︎ u/inanimated
πŸ“…︎ Aug 06 2020
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What do you call a former FBI agent who now works delivering packages?

A Fed-Ex Ex-Fed!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/slekrons
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
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Lipton probably saw many different pitchers of its brewed beverages before settling for the one on its iconic package...

They auditioned many before choosing the best model tea.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jul 24 2020
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My mail carrier got a sex change, so now she's really a post-man ...

guess she had the wrong package.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PeeSeaBayBee
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2021
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Why do balloons filled with helium cost more than balloons sold in packages?

Inflation

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πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2019
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How do you get a cat to deliver a package?

You call USPSpspspspspspsps.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ajaklakwnwbwhs
πŸ“…︎ May 02 2020
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I jokingly asked my mailman if they test all packages for coronavirus, but he didn't laugh, and now I'm not receiving any letters.

I think my delivery may be off.

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πŸ“…︎ Mar 10 2020
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Guess the Visual Pun
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PunPics
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2020
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Microwaving a TV dinner without opening the package to allow steam to escape is the best way to cook it!

It will be bursting with flavor!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2020
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I was running down the aisle to grab the last package of toilet paper, but I slipped and fell before someone else grabbed it.

You could say I completely wiped out.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kwoolery
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2020
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How do you package French bread?

You baguette.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pfheonix
πŸ“…︎ Jun 14 2019
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Two ants seemed to be having a race on a package.

A 3rd ant joined, and beat them both, and started gloating about it.

The two ants said, "that wasn't a race. We were just following instructions."

The 3rd ant asked, "what instructions?"

The two ants said, "see right here, it says 'tear across dotted line.'"

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πŸ‘€︎ u/aiaor
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2020
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Found a nice self-contained, already packaged one for y'all!
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rogaricel0914
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2019
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What’s the new FedEx and UPS merger going to be called?

FedUp.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kileni
πŸ“…︎ Oct 15 2020
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I ordered a self help tape called, "How to handle disappointment."...

When the package came....the box was empty.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24 2021
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100% certain

Me: Are you sure the small package will completely cover my house for potential intruders?

Security company: Verisure!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/kildemoles
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10 2021
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I worked with this guy Rob once...

...who was trying to hide he was bald. He damaged his hairpiece, not sure how, and was having a new one shipped to the office.

He was already kind of embarrassed and told us all, if you see a package for Peters (his last name) just put it on my desk. So I happen to be the one who sees it and as I'm bringing it to him my other coworker Paul asks what I have in my hands.

"Oh this?" I say, "this is Rob Peters' toupee, Paul."

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πŸ‘€︎ u/JSNhova
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08 2021
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My transformation is almost complete

So my wife is currently working from home and her employer decided to send her a hamper package in the mail. It was quite nice but pretty standard stuff. Wine, some cookies, crackers and also a bottle extra virgin olive oil (came with a cheese platter kit)

Wife was pretty happy about the fancy packaging and showed it to me saying "look they even sent extra virgin olive oil in this little fancy bottle for cheese platters!"

My response? "Aww that poor olive oil bottle never had sex? So sad!"

...Pls send help

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hyperpuma
πŸ“…︎ Dec 02 2020
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My wife tried to order an exotic snake online, but when the package arrived, it contained only feathered scarves...

Looks like the boa cons tricked her...

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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ May 13 2020
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