Well I mean I would be mad...
Two books meet in a Library. One says ' You don't look too well ' and the other replies..
... Just had my Appendix removed.
Here's a well written pun
My doctor recommended exercise to slim down as well as some orange juice for vitamins
It’s the weight and c approach I guess
Why did the blind man fall into the well?
Because he couldn't see that well.
Asking a toddler how well he does something...
“Poor old fool.” thought the well-dressed gentleman as he watched an old man fish in a puddle outside a pub. So he invited the old man inside for a drink. As they sipped their whiskeys, the gentleman thought he’d humor the old man and asked, “So how many have you caught today?”
The old man replied, “You’re the eighth.”
You know why they call it well water?
Because no one wants bad water.
Did you hear about the old man that fell down the well?
He couldn't see that well
What is the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well dressed man on a bicycle?
When chrome starts hogging the road as well with slickity slackity rims.
I passed my forklift test today. I did very well.
My carer says I should be able to try the spoon tomorrow.
Happy Father's Day applies to all humans and animals as well. But apparently it doesn't matter to elephants.
For them, it's irrelephant.
Well, whale, wale, wail, whail, Weil
What are the similarities between good yogurt and a well-traveled man?
Back in the day when sparrows had names, sparrows named Gus wouldn’t fare too well.
People love eating Asparagus.
If you want to test how well vehicles perform during automobile crashes...
You have to be a real dummy.
Are French speaking people celebrating 420 as well? Or do they just call it 80?
I get my deep well of empathy from my mother, obviously.
TIL that there is one country that has the most well-rested citizens
what do you call a dog breed, bred to hear really well?
what do you call a dog breed bred to hear really well?
corn bread
*this was a pun i made a while ago to see how many puns i could fit in a short joke.
Some said my last post wasn't a pun. Well, this one definitely is.
Well we are closed now but the boards still come.
well yes, bus actually also yes
Why did the dad fall down a well?
Obviously he couldn’t see that well.
My wife shouted, “You’re shirtless and also covered in oil?” I chuckled, “Well, you’re always saying I never glisten.”
“Listen! You never listen!”
I proclaimed to my wife that the world does not revolve around our little girl. Perturbed, she shot back, "Why on Earth would you ever say that!?" I explained, "Well, it's really quite simple you see, she's our daughter..."
My husband walked into the proctologists office, and I knew then that the doctor must have a child as well when I heard the words from the other side of the door,
My nephew does well in marathons but poorly in the 100 yard dash...
He's better off in the long run.
Well that escalated quickly
We may as well have aliens attacking this year. WHO knows?
I dated a communist once. I had no idea. She seemed sweet. But it did NOT end well
Honestly I should have noticed all the red flags
Well, it's one of the three colors he asks for
Well I kneed to share this one
Everyone braging about big Dicks, well I have a medium Dick, it can talk to ghosts
A guy wakes up from surgery. "How'd it go, Doc?" "Well, I've got good news and bad news. The bad news is that we amputated the wrong leg...
The good news is that your other leg is all better."
Why do parallel lines get on so well?
Because they’re straight up with each other.
What do they say about the Doctor who fell down a well?
He should have tended to the sick and left the well alone.
A well-loved parrot died, and was digitally immortalized in a 3D rendering
Polygon but not forgotten.
Sir, I'm Sikh. - Oh shit man, get well soon. (Especially funny with Australian accent, as Sikh and sick sound the same. Also funny because of how many people mistake Sikhs for Muslims. In no way intended to insult anyone for their beliefs. Just a funny pun.)
Well, I'm at home for the time being.
I heard that Big-Ben workers get paid very well.
They work around the clock.
My friend keeps saying "cheer up man it could be worse, you could be stuck underground in a hole full of water." I know he means well.
Most of the things Jesus did are very well known, but I haven't seen people mentioning that he was also a pioneer in sports
I mean, he was doing CrossFit almost 2000 years before it became popular!
Well I was doing speedy shopping, until I stopped and had hat to break to see this. Quality puns at the mall.
well
What do you call a Fish with no eye????
.... FSH
I tried really hard to do well in my Home Ec class...
...but my performance was just sew sew.
My brother wanted cold hard cash for Christmas. I think I delivered well
I heard stores are running out of butter as well.
That's not even margarinely funny
Well yes, but actually no
Thor went on a game show and did really well!
He crushed the lightning round.
"Hey, I'm Bill." "Well! I'm Bill as well." "Then I guess we are the Bills."
"Hmm. Then who's gonna pay us?"
I don't think I'm well-suited for this job as a newspaper editor.
Even my blood is a Type O!
What did Kim Jong Un said when he was not feeling well?
Does anyone know if that Corona Virus goes well with Lyme Disease?
Well since quarantine is making me stay at home...
I’ll be making mostly inside jokes
Home Depot receipt done well
Today I met a fish and the meeting went pretty well. I told him I would like to meet him again, but it got upset and swam away.
I guess, "I'll catch you later" wasn't the right phrase.
Well, you can't end a sentence with a proposition.
Why did the blind man fall into the well?
Why did the girl fall in the well?
She didn't see that well.
What is the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well dressed man on a bicycle ?
What's the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well dressed man on a bicycle?
Why did the old man fall in the well?
Because he couldn’t see that well.
What's the difference between a poorly dressed monkey on a tricycle and a well-dressed monkey on a bicycle?
Why did the old man fall in the well?
Because he could not see that well.
What is the difference between a poorly dressed man on bicycle and a well-dressed man on a tricycle?
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