It's propaganja.
It's tearable
Fly, you fool!
Two chemists walk into a bar.
The first one says, "I'll have some H2O."
The second says, "I'll have some water too. But why'd you order it like that? We aren't at work."
The firstο»Ώ chemist excuses himself and weeps in the bathroom. His assassination plot had failed.
It just wasn't it's type.
Neighsayers
A womb with a view
So they can see the battlefield
It was quite a breathtaking view.
More on this story as it unfolds
They're in a parent.
And haven't looked back since!
The Ariel view.
I never looked back!
She glanced in the rear view mirror and said, βYes, Officer, thatβs me!β
I think we're going to have to agree to diss a grebe.
I donβt know how this will unfold.
A Duplo mat
His father shouted, "Jim! You make a better Door than a window!"
It's only available to watch on the paper view channel
Supposedly it was a sold out tour, fairly apparent considering not a single seat was available on the bus!
At one point we happened to come across a field FULL TO THE BRIM with cows, and so I pleaded the bus driver to stop so we could take it all in.
We disembarked and took our places at the field fence, taking in the view of cow after cow.
I wondered to myself how it was so easy for folk to distinguish between cow and bull so readily, and so voiced my frustrations to the farmer close by.
βExcuse me sir, Iβve looked at your cattle and canβt for the life of me pick out a feature to help tell me the sex!!!!β
The farmer looked at me for a brief moment, painted with concern before asking,
βWhat about the uddersβ¦?β
I shook my head and frowned, and with mounting uncertainty replied,
βNot sure, youβd have to ask them!β
Sun-off-a-bach!
Itβs really cool. Only problem is itβs paper view.
Haven't looked back since.
So I removed the whole mirror.
I havenβt looked back since.
Unbereavable...
I said, βWhoopi Goldberg is ok, but I donβt like the other women on the show.β
The pay per see.
So, I took the family to Monterey this past weekend. Went to the aquarium, and when it came time for me to choose something to do, I decided to take them to pebble beach. Beautiful views, great time all around. On the drive, I kept explaining to the 8 year old how everything and everyone around us were rich.
So, weβre leaving the beach, and on the way out past the putting greens of the golf course, we see a family of deer. The kid asks, hey, are the deer rich out here as well?
I replied no son, probably worth a few bucks.
The mortician asked the deceasedβs wife how she would like the body dressed. He points out the man looks good in the black suit heβs already wearing. The widow however said she thought her husband always looked his best in blue, and she would really like him in a blue suit. She then hands the mortician a blank cheque and says βI donβt care how much it costs, but please have my husband in a blue suit for the viewing.β The woman returns the next day for the wake. To her delight she finds her husband dressed in a gorgeous blue suit with a subtle chalk stripe. Remarkably, the suit fit him perfectly. She says to the mortician, βwhatever this costs Iβm very satisfied, you did an excellent job and Iβm incredibly grateful. How much did you spend?β To her astonishment the mortician presents her with her blank cheque, and he says βthereβs no charge.β Shocked she replies βno really, I feel like i must compensate you for the cost of that exquisite blue suit.β βHonestly maβamβ, the mortician says, βit costs nothing, you see a diseased gentleman about your husbands size was brought in shortly after you left yesterday. He was wearing an attractive blue suit. So I asked his wife if she minded if her husband went to the grave wearing black. She had said it made no difference so long as he looked nice. So from that point on it was really just a matter of switching the heads.β
But I can see where you are coming from.
Kneel in front of me.
Says she canβt see me in camouflage.
You get a womb with a view
So I removed the whole mirror.
I havenβt looked back since.
