Need customer service puns

I'm looking for anything pun wise or clever in the area of customer service. Like "Minimum Rage" but something else.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/isaakwells
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 09 2017
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I have an idea for a math tutoring service.
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/maxcellane0us
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 17 2020
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Did you hear that U.S. Mail is starting a freight delivery service to compete with FedEx and UPS?

It’s called β€œS Cargo”.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/blizzardwizard88
πŸ“…οΈŽ Nov 11 2020
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I personally find Tinder not that great of a dating service.

I prefer e-bae

πŸ‘οΈŽ 24
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ggfchl
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 01 2020
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Amazon has come up with a new service where they deliver custom made suits to your house in 48 hours.

It’s called Tailor Swift.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 28 2020
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I’ve started an organization that grants scholarships to former armed services individuals that want to become animal doctors. Grantees are awarded based on an interview process.

I call it β€œBest bets for vetting vets for vets”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DinglebarryHandpump
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 01 2020
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Public Service Announcement: In order to meet the energy budget for 2020....

the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.

Thank you and have a nice day.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JadedByEntropy
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 14 2020
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What did the secret service yell when Disney sent assassins after our president?

Donald, duck!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Anddditburns
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 13 2020
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It's an essential service.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/orlanthi
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 22 2020
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The secret service has a new protocol if there's a threat in the room with the president

They used to yell down. Now it's

"Donald duck!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Boreddudemo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 13 2020
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New dating service launched in Prague!

It's called Czech-Mate.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 60
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/t44s
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 06 2020
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I frantically rushed to the computer service center to repair my storage device before it died

It was a hard drive

πŸ‘οΈŽ 9
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Chronoz42
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 29 2020
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The United States Postal Service got jokes
πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/GreenLeafGreg
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 10 2020
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I went to a Norwegian restaurant the other day. The food was delicious. The service was superb. The only problem was...

I couldn't a-fjord it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/nonononer
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 13 2020
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I let my out of town girlfriend know her vegetable service delivered a package today and I had some bad news.

She asked what had happened to it,

I told her the box had a leek in it.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 20
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/CptnBo
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 19 2020
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Eric refunded his memory extraction service

It wasn't what he had in mind

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/pingi2015
πŸ“…οΈŽ Sep 26 2020
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Hulu Is The Streaming Service Of Hulugans.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Cat_Loving_Trio
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 25 2020
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I tried to tell a joke about the Postal Service...

But nobody got it because I messed up the delivery.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 26 2020
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I can get you a great deal on cremation services....

But you have to urn it.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Ravanik
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 23 2020
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Why did the feminist want to boycott the Postal Service?

Because it is predominantly mail.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 27 2020
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The secret service isn't allowed to yell "Get down!" anymore when the president is about to be attacked.

Now they have to yell "Donald, duck!"

Edit: Wow! My first Silver and my first Gold! I am honored. What an amazing community. It's a great place to visit after a challenging day.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 14k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/H2O_is_Great
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 07 2019
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Did you hear about Hooters’ new contactless delivery service?

For a while it was knockers, but now it’s just honkers

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/dadzoned3
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 10 2020
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What do you call a fortune teller that provides his services for free?

A not-for-prophet

πŸ‘οΈŽ 46
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thesabermaniac
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 22 2020
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I went to one of those insect restaurants, and the service was terrible

Apparently it’s because fly-tipping is not allowed!

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/substantiallypartial
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 11 2020
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The US Postal Service doesn't have enough machines to differentiate the mail.

They're all out of sorts.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/JoeFas
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 22 2020
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Man with a picaxe was refused service...

they dont serve miners

πŸ‘οΈŽ 26
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Parkwad
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 11 2020
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"Back so soon? I thought you went for a haircut, dad?" asked my son. "Well..." I replied. "My barber wanted me to sign a long term service agreement before giving me a haircut, but I refused."

"I couldn't accept all those perms and conditions."

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 31 2020
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The secret service isn't allowed to yell "Donald, Duck" anymore when the president is about to be attacked

But their grandchildren still listen, in spite of rule 4, because hearing dear old grand-da be excited about his stories is just so sweet, whether he remembers tellin them or not

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+ 24 others

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/The__Odor
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 08 2020
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Excellent customer service.

I bought a T-Shirt the other day but it kept giving me static electric shocks every time I tried to wear it.

I took it back to the store and they kindly replaced it with another one free of charge.

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PringyUK
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 01 2020
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Today a naked man ran into our church and disrupted the service...

He was eventually caught by the organ.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Lostinthesauce336
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 19 2020
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I mean normally the customer service at the chip shop is fine. But when there's huge lines and only a few teens working there? Then it's...
πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ElvisGrizzly
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 15 2020
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As part of my community service, I had to hand out cans of pineapple to needy families...

I Doled it out.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 25 2020
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What cell service provider do track stars use?

Sprint

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/funnydeadpool
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 27 2020
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There’s a new Apple service for leaving angry reviews.

iRate.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 321
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Punnygeist
πŸ“…οΈŽ Dec 14 2019
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What's the name of the largest cell service provider for alien life forms?

ET&T

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Youwantfuckame
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 02 2020
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When we dropped off the car for service, we got the last courtesy car on the dealer's lot.

It was the loner.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 09 2020
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A judge is hearing a case. 'The people V. United Parcel Service' and determines that the trucks area nuisance and a danger to the town. He decides to ban all their trucks from the town and calls his ruling:

'UPS Truck Shun of Justice'

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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/UnexampledSalt
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 22 2020
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Garbage Public Service Announcement

It's very important to make sure that one always has a trash can at one's disposal.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/fisherkingpoet
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 02 2020
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Customer Service imgur.com/Tn9n136
πŸ‘οΈŽ 30
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ChuckZombie
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 09 2020
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The new Uterus Rental service...

Wombs-To-Go

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Just_Make_It
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 27 2020
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The secret service isn't allowed to yell "Get down!" anymore when the president is about to be attacked

now they have to yell "Donald, duck!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 44
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ALizardKing
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 07 2020
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Amazon has started a new service where you will get custom made shirts delivered within 48 hours.

It’s called Tailor Swift.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 07 2020
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Amazon is starting a new service where they deliver custom made shirts to your door within 48 hours.

They are calling it Tailor Swift.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 27 2020
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The secret service isn't allowed to yell "Get down!" anymore when the president is about to be attacked.

Now they have to yell "Donald Duck!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 82
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Overlevendeftw
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 22 2020
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The secret service...

... isn't allowed to yell "Get down!" anymore when the president is about to be attacked. Now they have to yell "Donald, duck!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Anon_777
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jun 10 2020
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The secret service isn't allowed to yell "Get down!" anymore when the president is about to be attacked.

Now they have to yell "Donald, duck!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 27
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Tankerman05
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 06 2020
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The secret service aren’t allowed to yell β€œGET DOWN” anymore if the president is about to be attacked.

Instead they say, β€œDONALD, Duck!”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 351
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/franz-hanz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Oct 26 2019
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The secret service isn't allowed to yell "Get down!" anymore when the president is about to be attacked.

Now they have to yell "Donald, duck!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 46
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Anam_Cara
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 24 2020
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The secret service isn't allowed to yell "Get down!" anymore when the president is about to be attacked.

Now they have to yell "Donald, duck!"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ferrisjuulersdayoff
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 06 2020
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