A Southern minister decided that a visual demonstration would add emphasis to his Sunday sermon. Four worms were placed into four separate jars.
The first worm was put into a container of alcohol. The second worm was put into a container of cigarette smoke. The third worm was put into a container of chocolate syrup.
The fourth worm was put into a container of good clean soil.
At the conclusion of the sermon, the Minister reported the following results:
The first worm in alcohol -Dead.
The second worm in cigarette smoke -Dead
Third worm in chocolate syrup -Dead
Fourth worm in good clean soil - Alive.
So the Minister asked the congregation - What can you learn from this demonstration?
Maxine was sitting in the back, quickly raised her hand and said,
'As long as you drink, smoke and eat chocolate, you won't have worms!'
That pretty much ended the service.
We had a cleaning service come to the house today, called Two Maids and a Mop. Well, three maids showed up and my dumb husband goes, “which one of you is the mop?”
A church is cleaning up after a service, and they hear a noise in the back. They go to investigate, and they find a bear.
"Have no fear, I will not harm you."
"How can we tell?"
"I was just here to say a prayer."
"Dear lord, thank you for this food."