I need to learn how to take care of my new tree
So I'm going to nursery school.
UFO's have been in the news a lot lately but no one seems to care.
Frankly, I think it must be over most people's heads.
People who take care of chickens are basically....
Someone was talking to me about kitchen utensils, something I really couldn't care for.
I told them to sieve it for someone who cares.
Nobody cares about Golden Retrievers
I'm looking for someone to take care of my toddler that doesn't do drugs or smoke cigarettes.
Seriously, he's been teetotal for months now.
No one cares about me - that's why I can't evaporate
What did the French snail say when he couldn’t find his care
"I don't care where those damn cows ran off to."
....said the farmer, callously.
I usually don't care what other people are saying...
....until they start whispering.
How to call a fish who cares only for oneself?
“So, the US is pulling out of the war right? Like, we don’t care about their fighting anymore?”
I ordered a Hit Man to take care of my business partner the other day.
After a change of heart I cancelled the order, but it was too late.
He'd been despatched.
My elderly neighbor had some landscapers take care of his lawn every weekend for several years. Recently, he hired a new crew, but forgot to fire the old crew. So this weekend they both showed up to mow his lawn, and got into a fight over who should be there.
He had no idea he had started a turf war.
What do you call someone who takes care of chickens?
I don't understand how some people don't care about elephants being an endangered species.
I guess they just find them irrelephant.
Why didn’t the geologist care about his foliated metamorphic rock?
Four Seasons Total Lawn Care created some good ones after the bizarre press conference Saturday such as "Lawn and Order" and "Make America Rake Again" - I don't see them using this one on their promotional materials though:
Told my dad I took care of getting the propane tanks at the house filled. His response?
Why do some types of healthcare professionals only care about themselves?
Because they're nurse assists.
Some say it’s sad that so many kids are shuffled through foster care.
Others might call it reWARDing.
I know. I’m sorry.
How much do I care about the environment?
Even the bags under my eyes are reusable.
People who take good care of their hair with just shampoo and water...
must love it unconditionally.
My lawn care guy had to give up mowing when his mower broke down.
Probably already here but who cares?
When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. Somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the shed, the boat, making beer. Always something more important to me...
Finally, she thought of a clever way to make her point.
When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors.
I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house.
I was gone only a minute and when I came out, I handed her a toothbrush.
I said, "When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway."
The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a slight limp...
Therapists only care about one thing
And it’s fu*king discussing
My freind: no body cares about car rental company jokes
How do you call a Sea creature that only cares about himself?
These days everyone seems to be going for progressiveness until it comes to something they really care about.
& hence I don't care 'bout anything.
I don’t care if all of the other giants see me as a big joke for filing a restraining order on a guy I’ve got 75 feet on.
Beanstalked is a serious matter.
Are you Tina Fey-mished? Would you care for Adele-ectable Meal? Come to Celebrit-Eats
Help me think of more celebrity food puns please!
The menu includes such dishes as:
-Marilyn Mon-roast beef
-Patrick Stew-art
-Tim Curry
-The Cate Blan-cheddar burger
-The Audrey Hep-burger
-Hayden Panet-tiramisu
-Leonard Nim-oysters
Add moreeeee
Hats off to all the doctors and health care professionals
How did the mathematician take care of his constipation problem?
He worked it out with a pencil.
What do you call a dinosaur that takes good care of his teeth?
Where do prematurely born calves go to get care
Why do I care that my son’s phone was at 18%?
Cause it was the minimum age of percent.
Last time I was on a flight, the stewardess approached me and asked, “Sir, would you care for a drink?”
I asked her, “what are my options?”
She said, “yes or no.”
What do you call people that care for chickens?
What are you if you take care of a chicken?
What do you call someone who takes care of chickens?
What's the deal with those people who take care of chickens?
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