Does France ban any activities for its universal healthcare?

I can't imagine the Pierre pressure it would cause...

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2021
🚨︎ report
Why do some types of healthcare professionals only care about themselves?

Because they're nurse assists.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hysnbrg4
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I couldn't stop laughing when I heard what they're going to call Biden's healthcare plan.

JoeCare.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kellzone
πŸ“…︎ Nov 06 2020
🚨︎ report
The American healthcare system is UnBEARable
πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/arc-thicc_phoenix
πŸ“…︎ Feb 20 2020
🚨︎ report
How can we be expected to manage universal healthcare when we obviously haven't even figured out

planetary healthcare?

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Do you know what will happen if we pass universal healthcare?

All bums will be able to get colonoscopies.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/conundrumbombs
πŸ“…︎ May 19 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call a healthcare worker that doesn’t self-isolate after contracting COVID-19?

A hippocritic oaf.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Phaedruswine
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2020
🚨︎ report
I hear you stole my healthcare joke.

You’re gonna pay for that

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rarehipster
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Do you know why i like to tell healthcare jokes?

Eh, I guess it couldn't hurt to tell you.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Vetekatten
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2019
🚨︎ report
If Rick Perry was president Healthcare would be called Perry Care. If the presidents last name was bear it would be Bear Care.
πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lucidus_somniorum
πŸ“…︎ Mar 24 2017
🚨︎ report
Doing healthcare IT support this morning...

An end-user learning a new system wanting to initiate an outgoing letter to a patient: "How do I start a letter?"

Me: "Usually with 'Dear Sir or Madam...'"

πŸ‘︎ 16
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Klopfenpop
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2014
🚨︎ report
Groans from all the other healthcare students.

Im in a healthcare program and im really tall. Tall enough that almost no beds ever can fit my entire body on them. I was the "patient" for an assignment we are working on and the bed came up just short of my ankles. They were standing around me so I pointed to my feet and said "Hey look, i'm hanging two feet over the edge!" It took them a second to get it but there were groans all around.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sirchewi3
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2015
🚨︎ report
Healthcare Dad Joke from today

We use these red sliding sheets to help transfer patients from the operating table to their trolley (they're widely used in hospitals and care environments for various patient manual handling tasks). For those who are unfamiliar, it's basically a double layered, frictionless sheet you position under the patient in order (theoretically) to transfer them with minimal force and effort.

One particular colleague hates them, and today ranted:

"I would love to punch the guy who invented these and has probably made millions of pounds and retired"

To which someone immediately responded:

"I bet he's a right slippery character though".

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/machschau
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2015
🚨︎ report
What vampire is a healthcare professional?

Dr. Acula

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Draxxed_sklounst
πŸ“…︎ Feb 16 2016
🚨︎ report
Someone asked me today if I was ordained

To which I told them I worked in healthcare. When they looked confused by my response I explained that I know how to a minister medication.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CountChappy
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2021
🚨︎ report
I was recently burgled. They took my life preserver, my AED and my portable oxygen tank.

It was my entire life savings,

πŸ‘︎ 753
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Aug 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Kill Bill
πŸ‘︎ 5k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/shu-chi-senpai
πŸ“…︎ Sep 30 2019
🚨︎ report
I have a lot of pain

It's a good job I'm French, otherwise I'd have to pay healthcare...

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/sugar_lettuce
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23 2020
🚨︎ report
A short essay on the benefits of beating the shit out of each other β€” A satirical essay based on a single, overplayed pun

In my opinion we should beat the shit out of constipated people because:

  1. Laxatives are an unhealthy way of dealing with feces. On the other hand, beating the shit out of someone is a good way to practice sports activities like, running, grip strength, punching techniques etc.

  2. Other methods of dealing with feces take alot of money. Laxatives aren't cheap in our flawed healthcare system! On the other hand, there are people that are willing to pay you to beat the shit out of you. By using this method you can become richer and deal with your shitty problems.

  3. Constipation requires being in the bathroom for a long time. This can be very lonely for the people involved. However, beating the shit out of others can be done in any place. Your home, the local park, or even the shady street corner! Not only that it's a very social activity, requiring a minimum of at least 2 people, but usually done in groups of 2-5 people.

Although some people might say, that beating the shit out of each other is violent, most of them have never been to a public toilet and hence are unable to realize how much more painful and violent the alternative is.

In summery, beating the shit out of people is a good, legitimate, and affordable alternative to laxatives and is a better, more progressive way, to deal with constipation.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/a5paperblank
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2020
🚨︎ report
First time he got me in a while

Talking about the expensive healthcare Dad "you need to change your major to become a doctor".
Me "I don't have the patience for that".
Dad "you would if you became a doctor".
Facepalm.

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ezekiel2517_
πŸ“…︎ Mar 30 2014
🚨︎ report
I got dad joked by a 90 year old patient today

So there I was in the process of helping him walk back to his room. During the walk I happen to look over and he is grimacing in pain with a look of disgust. As a worried healthcare provider, I ask him,

"Patient, you look like you're in pain, how do you feel"?

Without skipping a beat, he looks up into my eyes and with a trembling voice through the pain he replies..

"with my hands"

I was taken aback, not realizing what had just happened to me. He then smiled and startled to chuckle, and only then did I realize I had just been had by a dad and started to laugh myself.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/StankyHoodrat
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2014
🚨︎ report
Family get together dad joke

At a big family get together, 30+ people all around a big table eating lunch and my dad asks the whereabouts of his sister. My uncle says she's had to go to the vets, to which he replies:

" Could she not afford a doctor!?"

The simultaneous groans were amazing, and he had the biggest grin on his face!

However seeing as we have "free" healthcare here in the UK, it doesn't really make too much sense, but we let him have his moment

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/vincepg13
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2014
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.