If Mary is the mother of Jesus and Jesus is the lamb of God
Does that mean that Mary had a little lamb?
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︎ Feb 14 2021
Why is Jesus the "Lamb of God?"
Because he used him as a Scapegoat.
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︎ May 28 2021
What do you call a lamb that taunts and teases the other lambs?
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︎ May 10 2021
Tried stealing a leg of lamb from the store
A staff asked me what I am doing with that. I replied, "Roasted with potatoes, vegetables and a lamb sauce would be great."
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︎ May 18 2021
Last night I made a lamb curry......
But apparently they prefer grass.
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︎ Mar 17 2021
I tried roasted lamb for the first time
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︎ Feb 05 2021
The Science of The Lambs.
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︎ Dec 22 2020
In a field with lots of sheep and lambs roaming around, a giant wolf appeared and swallowed whole a baby lamb. The lamb whined and yelped nonstop for hours on end. After a while the wolf started getting sick, and yet the lamb yelped and whined ever louder.
Finally the wolf died and the baby lamb walked out of the wolf and rejoined itβs momma in the flock of sheep. Turns out the wolf died of internal bleating.
All credit goes to my coworker.
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︎ Dec 09 2020
I bought a lamb today
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︎ Dec 19 2020
How does a lamb, a drum, and a snake sound falling off a cliff?
Baa-dum-sss.
(Told by literally my dad)
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︎ Sep 16 2020
Iβm not surprised Silence of the Lambs won Oscars, its an offally good film
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︎ Jul 19 2020
Why didn't Gordon Ramsey upvote the picture of the lamb Steak?
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︎ May 06 2020
My daughter wants a boyfriend, but hasn't been asked out yet. To comfort her, I bought her a little lamb, and named it "Relation".
It's officially her first relationsheep.
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︎ Feb 15 2020
When Mary had a little lamb, the labor and delivery doctor was surprised...
When Old MacDonald had a farm, the doctor died of shock.
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︎ Sep 02 2020
Why didn't the lamb want to play with their friends?
He was a little sheep-ish.
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︎ Mar 06 2020
A lamb, a drum, and a snake all fell off a cliff
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︎ Oct 05 2019
What do you call it when lambs fall down a mountain?
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︎ Aug 04 2019
My kid (5) was running around saying 'Baa Baa I'm a lamb'
So I asked her to wear a plastic sheet, she goes to my wife and says her line again.
Baa Baa, I'm a lamb.
Wife: What's with the plastic sheet?
Me: She's been..... LAMBINATED
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︎ Aug 22 2019
Why did the lamb go to rehab?
Because he had a gambolling problem.
I made that up and I'm not even a dad.
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︎ Jun 17 2019
Who does a lamb go to if it has back pain?
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︎ Aug 26 2019
Stop basting my Lamb, you lamb-baster
So I came across a word today in my reading that I had heard before and was able to deduce it's likely meaning based in the context it was used, however, to be safe, I looked it up anyway and while reading the book definition came up with what I hope is an original pun (phrase)...
Context: When someone is giving you a hard time you can say, "stop basting my Lamb, you lamb-baster"
lambaste - criticize (someone or something) harshly
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︎ Feb 06 2019
What do you call a frugal lamb?
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︎ Jun 04 2018
You want to hear a funny joke about a lamb?
Nah, honestly it's pretty sheep
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︎ Jul 03 2019
Did you hear about the dwarf fortune teller that's on the lamb?
He's a small medium at large.
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︎ Jul 17 2019
My wife made a delicious lamb Dahl
I complimented her by saying it was the Dahl-i-Lamb-er of curries.
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︎ Jun 15 2019
My lamb used to be really confident.
You know, up until the point where he started getting sheepish.
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︎ Aug 25 2018
Dinner recently with two dishes; one w/ Lamb and one w/ Rabbit.
The waitress asked which one I liked better. I pointed to the rabbit dish and said, "This one, by a hare".
True story.
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︎ Jun 14 2017
My brother asked me to cater his wedding. He wants over 200 servings of roasted lamb chops.
Ain't nobody got thyme for that
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︎ Jun 18 2015
Was making roast lamb for dinner and dropped the tray out of the oven .
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︎ Feb 10 2015
At what piece of furniture does the Silence of the Lambs villain deliver his speeches?
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︎ Nov 01 2015
What kind of car would a lamb drive?
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︎ Sep 05 2014
Lamb Stew
Her: I'll make the lamb today, I need to put some clothes on anyway.
Me: You need to wear clothes in front of the lamb? Feeling a little sheepish?
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︎ Oct 08 2016
Mary had a little lamb.
She also had a bear.
I often saw her little lamb, but i never saw her bare.
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︎ Jan 13 2017
My Dad on lamb. A classic one
My brother ordered a Lamb Patty at a fancy restaurant. He only got about halfway through it by the time dinner was over.
My dad goes, "what's wrong with it? Was it Baaaaaaaaaaad? Making a goat noise as he said it.
I couldn't stop laughing.
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︎ Jul 30 2014
If a ram is a lamb and a donkey is an ass...
...Why is a ram in the ass called a goose?
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︎ Sep 05 2015
Every time he sees lamb on the menu.
Dad: "How's the lamb? I hear it's not baaaad!"
Waiter laughs a little bit and agrees. Brother's palm hits his forehead in disbelief. Repeat at every subsequent restaurant visit at which lamb is offered.
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︎ Oct 08 2013
After my daughter named her stuffed lamb "Yucky"...
Wife: "Yucky like gross?"
Me: "No, Yucky like ewe." (I begin crying from laughter)
Wife (with a blank face): "You think your hilarious don't you?"
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︎ Mar 10 2014
A lamb, a drum and a snake fell off a cliff
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︎ Jul 01 2018
So if Mary had Jesus, and Jesus was the Lamb of God...
Does that mean Mary had a little lamb?
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︎ Aug 06 2018
What sound did the lamb, the drum and the snake make when you threw it from a cliff?
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︎ Aug 11 2018
A lamb, a drum and a snake fall off a cliff
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︎ Jul 31 2018
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