A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff...

β€œBa-dumm-Tsss”

πŸ‘︎ 11k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/streety22
πŸ“…︎ May 08
🚨︎ report
Sheep in Clothing, Digital, Me
πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CluKInCok
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03
🚨︎ report
Here's a joke about a man and his flock of sheep.

Stop me if you've herd it before.

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Findrel_Underbakk
πŸ“…︎ Aug 12
🚨︎ report
A farmer takes a rest on a bale of hay. β€œI love my job” he says aloud. A sheep replies β€œAll you do is boss me around all day!” The farmer, clearly upset by this statement, responds β€œWhat did you just say??” The sheep replies:

β€œYou herd me.”

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shawmpton
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20
🚨︎ report
What do you call a newborn sheep?

A Baaaaahby...

I'll see myself out.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/N3ss3
πŸ“…︎ Aug 13
🚨︎ report
I just saw a car being driven by a sheep in a swimsuit!

It was a lambikini

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Blood_Quake
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26
🚨︎ report
A sheep dog tells her owner she found all fifty sheep. Her owner says that there should only be 46

The dog says, β€œbut I rounded them up.”

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PoeJascoe
πŸ“…︎ Mar 25
🚨︎ report
What did the blue sheep say to the red sheep?

Voting third party is a waste.

πŸ‘︎ 84
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Urbandale-Apiary
πŸ“…︎ Jul 08
🚨︎ report
Sheep shouldn't eat sweets

They get diableates

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kimenon001
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19
🚨︎ report
Got bit by a sheep tic amidst this pandemic

Now I have corona and lymes

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/tbonemistake
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the sheep riding bandit?

They say he's still on the lamb

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HighPressureH2O
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31
🚨︎ report
I know some really great jokes for people who love sheep

Let me know if you herd them.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/asiers
πŸ“…︎ Jul 29
🚨︎ report
My neighbor ran over from his farm and was sobbing. β€œMy sheep are missing!” He cried. β€œMy sheep are missing! Please help me!”

I said β€œthat sounds like a ewe problem.”

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/clubberin
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12
🚨︎ report
You guys hear about the band made up of sheep and cows?

I like their song β€œBaa Moo Rising”

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RedShirtCashion
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22
🚨︎ report
Where do Sheep go to get haircuts?

The Baa Baa Shop!

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Punx80
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23
🚨︎ report
X a sheep and potato?

A ewe tuber

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/suamigojose
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31
🚨︎ report
What's a sheep's favorite song?

Happy birthday to ewe

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/hotsprings1234
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11
🚨︎ report
My son recently got casted as a sheep in a play but was nervous about forgetting his lines

I said "Son you're just feeling sheepish"

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/liverpool135
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28
🚨︎ report
I saw a sheep in a swimsuit driving a sports car today.

It must have been a Lamb bikini.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/420ZeusNoScope
πŸ“…︎ Jul 26
🚨︎ report
I asked my sheepdog how many sheep we had, he said 40.

"What? We should only have 37!" I replied.

"I know" he said, "I rounded them up".

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Light_bulbnz
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26
🚨︎ report
The neighbour's sheep failed to break into the grain shed.

There was no battering ram.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/xXSparklePonyXx
πŸ“…︎ Jul 23
🚨︎ report
What do you call a car being driven by a sheep wearing a swim-suit?

A Lamb Bikini

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/studentadvisor101
πŸ“…︎ Jul 11
🚨︎ report
I just saw a car being driven by a sheep in a swimsuit.

It was a lamb bikini.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Brucemoose1
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06
🚨︎ report
The thing about the music for the Sheep Waltz...

It has 3 beats to each baa

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dwrk92
πŸ“…︎ Jun 26
🚨︎ report
Why did the ram get in trouble for insulting the female sheep?

Cause he called her an ew!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/space0watch
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01
🚨︎ report
Why don’t cows and sheep get coronavirus?

They have herd immunity.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 18
🚨︎ report
Where do sheep go potty?

In the baa-throom

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pollrobots
πŸ“…︎ Jun 06
🚨︎ report
Sheep and music
πŸ‘︎ 281
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Radish00
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27
🚨︎ report
What do baby sheep do at funerals

They Lambent

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/piratecheese13
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10
🚨︎ report
A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall off a cliff

BA-DUMM-TSS

πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/x_amxxn_x
πŸ“…︎ Jan 23
🚨︎ report
What did the sheep with scoliosis say?

Ow my baaaaaaaack

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mupmurp
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13
🚨︎ report
What is the sound an exploding sheep makes?

Sis’s, boom, baah.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Shadeauxmarie
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16
🚨︎ report
Did you know that it takes 3 sheep to make one sweater?

Amazing, I didn't even know they could knit.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AustralianGroan
πŸ“…︎ May 05
🚨︎ report
A sheep shot
πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kuplub
πŸ“…︎ May 05
🚨︎ report
What's a sheep's favorite car to drive?

A LAMBorghini!

πŸ‘︎ 24
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πŸ‘€︎ u/FullSass
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10
🚨︎ report
I read an article earlier that said it actually takes three sheep to make one sweater…

I didn't even know they could knit!

πŸ‘︎ 62
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πŸ‘€︎ u/madazzahatter
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16
🚨︎ report
Why did the sheep dog bring home 30 sheep, when there were only 26?

Because he rounded them up!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/chichi1011
πŸ“…︎ May 20
🚨︎ report
What do you call a sheep grandma?

Baaa-nana

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ultimatedelman
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30
🚨︎ report
Sheepdog: Yep, that’s 40 sheep there. Farmer: What, there should be only 37?

Sheepdog: Hey, I rounded them up!

πŸ‘︎ 68
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πŸ“…︎ Mar 21
🚨︎ report
What car would a racer sheep drive?

A lamb-orgni !!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crickypop
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17
🚨︎ report
A sheep dog says to the farmer, "I'm going to round up the sheep."

The dog comes back with 50 sheep. The farmers says, "we only have 48 sheep." The dog replies, "Yea, I told you I was going to round them up."

πŸ‘︎ 6k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NeGuy1
πŸ“…︎ Sep 10 2019
🚨︎ report
Sheepdog: That's all 50 sheep Shepherd: What? We should have only 47

Sheepdog: I know, I rounded them up

πŸ‘︎ 80
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πŸ‘€︎ u/x_amxxn_x
πŸ“…︎ Mar 11
🚨︎ report
If I had a sheep...

I would name him Mr. Wool Wide

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DNAdrian95
πŸ“…︎ May 14
🚨︎ report
A farmer asked his dad if he could round up his 36 sheep

β€œSure,” said the dad β€œ40.”

πŸ‘︎ 79
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dandan_56
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17
🚨︎ report
A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall down a cliff..

Baa dum tss!

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cyberwiz91
πŸ“…︎ Apr 24
🚨︎ report
What’s a sheep’s favorite instrument?

Two-baaaas

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Electrick23
πŸ“…︎ Apr 03
🚨︎ report
Sheep kept complaining to the Shepard over and over and over until the Shepard says...

I herd you.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/kylejay915
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30
🚨︎ report
A sheepdog tells the farmer he's going to round up the sheep and comes back with 50 sheep and the farmer says "We only have 48 sheep."

The dog replies "I said I was going to round them up,"

πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Trtlman
πŸ“…︎ Feb 25
🚨︎ report
Some thieves recently made off with a bunch of sheep by riding them away.

Be careful, I herd they were on the lamb.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Apr 20
🚨︎ report
What laptop would a sheep use?

A toshi-baa

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/crickypop
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17
🚨︎ report
Sheep dog: here are your 40 sheep!

Shepherd: Wait, I only had 37!

Sheep dog: I know, I rounded them up!

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dfarni
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31
🚨︎ report
Shaun the sheep wine...
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zaffhome
πŸ“…︎ Mar 04
🚨︎ report
I have this weird talent where I can control sheep just by listening to them.

I herd it with my own ears.

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Feb 10
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the guy that robbed banks and his get away "vehicle" was a baby sheep?

He's still on the lamb.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11
🚨︎ report
I'm pretty sure I just saw a sheep granting wishes alongside a really nice car

I'm not sure if it was a lamborghini

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/timmshady
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12
🚨︎ report
Two farmers were talking. "Mate, why do all your sheep have those black stripes on their sides?"

" It's my new counting system, see that special collar on me dog, it's got a camera and it scans the sheep as the dog rounds them up. "

"Damn me, what'll they think of next? What's it called?"

"Baa codes mate"

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AustralianGroan
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22
🚨︎ report
Who is a sheep's favorite performer?

Ed Shereen.

πŸ‘︎ 11
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πŸ‘€︎ u/VonMeatstein
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09
🚨︎ report
How do you turn 8 scattered sheep into 10 sheep?

By rounding them up

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OFWILLBEDONEFOR
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28
🚨︎ report
A sheep, an idiot, and a snake walk into a bar.

Baaaa dumb hisssssss

πŸ‘︎ 194
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πŸ‘€︎ u/stoponby
πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2019
🚨︎ report
A sheep, a drum, and a snake fall down a cliff.

Baa-Dumm-Tsssss

πŸ‘︎ 94
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07
🚨︎ report
I just saw a scantily-clad sheep driving a sports car

it was in a lamb bikini

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/smartasskicker
πŸ“…︎ Feb 11
🚨︎ report
What do you call a sheep dipped in chocolate?

A Hershey Baa

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/j8L2850
πŸ“…︎ Jan 07
🚨︎ report
I get really strong after shaving the wool off of my sheep, William.

It's my sheer Will power.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/rapidwave
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13
🚨︎ report
What would happen if a man had sex with a sheep?

That would be BAAAAD.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Valdagast
πŸ“…︎ Jan 30
🚨︎ report
A sheep dog tells a farmer, "I've gathered up 40 sheep". The farmer replies, "But we only have 37 sheep?" The dog responds..

"I've rounded them up"

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DipNotes
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28
🚨︎ report
Why won't the dog listen to the farmer's sheep jokes?

Because he has herd them all.

πŸ‘︎ 111
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πŸ‘€︎ u/iknowthisischeesy
πŸ“…︎ Nov 17 2019
🚨︎ report
Men who date sheep in the late afternoon...

...are just looking for CaSiO3.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Rocknocker
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06
🚨︎ report
What do you get if you cross a sheep dog with a daisy?

A Collie-flower!

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tommetucker
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06
🚨︎ report
Where does a female sheep with severe hypothermia go?

The ICU.

πŸ‘︎ 36
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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_friendly_one
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2019
🚨︎ report
Why was the sheep upset with the criminal?

Because he was on the lamb!

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Why could the flock of female sheep never remember anything? /r/Jokes/comments/f3aoj0/…
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/patchy72
πŸ“…︎ Feb 13
🚨︎ report
What is a sheep’s favorite insult

You baa-stard

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/-FBI_CHAN-
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
🚨︎ report
A farmer asked me if I can help him round up 18 sheep

I said sure, it's 20

πŸ‘︎ 175
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ar1stocrat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 31 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you mix a cricket with a sheep?

A sleepless night.

^(Source: My sister)

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SneakieSnek
πŸ“…︎ Jan 24
🚨︎ report
My friend, who happens to be a female sheep, made a clone of herself and had sex with her clone. My entire friend group was totally disgusted, but I encouraged it, and said...

Ewe do ewe.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Youtuatoot
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08
🚨︎ report
Sheep jokes are bad.

Really baaaaaaa-d.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoshB82
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Sheep’s name at local fair.
πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ“…︎ Aug 26 2019
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I don't understand why the Australian authorities haven't called out the lady sheep to deal with the fires. Everyday, when I was a child, Smokey the Bear was on TV telling me,

"Only EWE can prevent forest fires."

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/slowshot
πŸ“…︎ Jan 08
🚨︎ report
What did the sheep say about the vibrating beetle?

BAH HUMBUG!

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/omadude82
πŸ“…︎ Dec 24 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend loves sheep so much he decided to propose!

"Will ewe marry me?" Said he.

"Baaah!" Replied she.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
🚨︎ report
How did the sheep farmer become best in his field?

Shear luck.

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/joeChump
πŸ“…︎ Dec 07 2019
🚨︎ report
Where do sheep go to get their hair cut?

The baa-baa shop

πŸ‘︎ 31
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ThePhantomAli
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
🚨︎ report
My 10-year-old daughter gave me this one: My friend asked me to round up her 36 sheep.

So I told her 40.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/freshstart321
πŸ“…︎ Oct 09 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call music written by sheep?

Lambic pentameter

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JonSolo1
πŸ“…︎ Dec 09 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you cross a bee and a sheep?

A bah-humbug.

πŸ‘︎ 10
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear that New Zealand came up with a new use for sheep?

They now use them for wool

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/beerbellybegone
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2019
🚨︎ report
My sheep-powered computer was starting to run slowly

So I added more ram

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GaryTheKnight
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2019
🚨︎ report
My girlfriend is a sheep farmer. When she starts to have orgasms, she wants me to shout the names of local movie showplaces.

She likes coming to a theater near ewe.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a buffet for sheep?

All you can bleat!

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/styxdyxx
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2019
🚨︎ report
What's a sheep's favorite art style?
πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ElvisDumbledore
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Shepherd: Did you get all the sheep in?

Sheepdog: Yep. All 30 of them.

Shepherd: We've only got 28 sheep.

Sheepdog: I rounded them up.

πŸ‘︎ 26
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pelipar
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2019
🚨︎ report
How do you measure the circumference of a Sheep?

Shepherds Pie

πŸ‘︎ 19
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Neko_Queen
πŸ“…︎ Oct 17 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a sheep with no legs?

A cloud.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2019
🚨︎ report
Sheep to Farmer: All you do is boss me around all day!

Farmer: What did you say?

Sheep: You herd me.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Pozd5995
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23
🚨︎ report

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