What an EGGcelent idea.
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︎ Nov 22 2020
Which game was a result of a mind blowing idea?
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︎ Nov 22 2020
Snap ideas
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︎ Nov 12 2020
Why is it a good idea to put more books in prison libraries?
Because the prose outweigh the cons.
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︎ Oct 23 2020
I have an idea for a math tutoring service.
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︎ Oct 17 2020
My wife didnβt like my idea to market a line of belts with little clocks built into the buckle.
She said it was a waist of time.
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︎ Nov 16 2020
I think animal testing is a terrible idea...
They get all nervous and give the wrong answers.
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︎ Nov 22 2020
My wife was disappointed at my idea to put her shoes outside last night......
I thought I'd just put the Fila's out there
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︎ Dec 02 2020
I have this idea for a takeaway restaurant which just sells dairy
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︎ Oct 31 2020
Why's it a bad idea to date celery?
Because when you break up you know it'll keep on stalking you.
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︎ Nov 13 2020
I'm thinking of entering a talent show. I have two ideas for my act. Either a Blues Traveler cover band, or an impression of Richard Nixon.
I'm hoping to win, by Hook or by Crook.
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︎ Nov 29 2020
Do you have any idea what they do to eggs in prison?
I'll tell you thisβ It ain't over easy.
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︎ Oct 01 2020
What do you say when anxious ideas won't leave you alone?
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︎ Oct 28 2020
I have an idea for a new product: a butter substitute mixed with an aphrodisiac.
I'm calling it Margarine of Eros.
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︎ Oct 24 2020
My 16 year old son was in the kitchen baking up a storm when my wife came downstairs. "What are you doing?" she asked him. "I'm going to have a bake sale to buy a car," he answered. "Where on earth did you get that idea? We're in a pandemic! No one is going to buy baked goods!" He said...
"I heard on Reddit that you need cake to get the car, ma."
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︎ May 06 2020
I invented a new idea:
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︎ Sep 13 2020
I have no idea what to get now...am I supposed to get both?
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︎ Sep 24 2020
Iβm pretty open to the idea of getting bionics
Honestly, Iβd pay an arm and a leg for them!
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︎ Oct 04 2020
You think you have an idea but you have...
What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye-deer. What do you call a deer with no eyes or legs? Still no eye-deer
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︎ Sep 27 2020
My infant son is a bit constipated. My wife was like "I want to weigh him today" and I said that's not a good idea. She asked why...
Because he is full of shit.
She responded "you shouldn't say that"
I responded "what he just lies all day."
Real convo
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︎ Nov 03 2020
My wife went into labor today, so I read the front page of /r/DadJokes to her as a distraction from the pain. Unfortunately, she didnβt laugh once, was clearly not amused and I have no idea why...
It must have been the delivery...
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︎ Aug 26 2020
I once sat next to a baby on a 10 hour flight. I had no idea that it was possible for someone to cry for 10 hours straight.
Even the baby was impressed.
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︎ Oct 06 2020
Why is it a bad idea to swallow toothpaste?
Because youβll destroy your stomach cavity!
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︎ Oct 19 2020
I quizzed my daughter, "If thereβs a bee in my hand, whatβs in my eye?" Reluctantly, she admitted, "I have no idea. What?" I chuckled...
"Beauty, because beauty is in the eye of the bee-holder!"
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︎ Jul 23 2020
I recently watched a documentary on Mike Tyson. I had no idea he was so religious...
He kept saying he likes to hit people in the FAITH!!!
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︎ Sep 30 2020
If you tell me what my idea of a perfect date is...
I personally think it's DD/MM/YY. The rest are a bit confusing.
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︎ Oct 21 2020
Shout out to whoever first came up with the idea to shred cheese.
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︎ Aug 05 2020
I dumped the idea of throwing the garbage in my neighbor's backyard
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︎ Sep 04 2020
What's your idea for a perfect date?
MM/DD/YYYY. I find other formats confusing.
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︎ Sep 01 2020
What do you call a baby squid with a great idea?
I dunno, but I've got an inkling...
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︎ Sep 30 2020
Me: I had no idea our daughter would go this far.
My husband: I know, this trebuchet is amazing. Let's get our son!
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︎ Jul 13 2020
I thought going to a playground for a date was a good idea...
Turns out it was a swing and a miss.
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︎ Sep 10 2020
Why is whispering in public a bad idea?
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︎ Sep 09 2020
Suggest to post here, I HAVANT an idea how well it will do
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︎ Aug 01 2020
Iβm already outta ideas
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︎ Jul 23 2020
People might like the idea of driving a transparent car, but I donβt.
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︎ Aug 01 2020
I got a parking ticket for being parked illegally the other day and Iβve no idea why. I mean...
The sign clearly said, βFine for parkingβ.
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︎ Jul 20 2020
I dated a communist once. I had no idea. She seemed sweet. But it did NOT end well
Honestly I should have noticed all the red flags
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︎ Oct 24 2019
I have absolutely no idea what a cloning machine does!
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︎ Jul 20 2020
Iβm already outta ideas
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︎ Jul 23 2020
Why is farting on an apple store a bad idea?
Because they have no windows.
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︎ Jun 28 2020
Iβm already outta ideas
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︎ Jul 23 2020
My idea for a Tic-tac-toe movie failed
Although it looked good on paper
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︎ Aug 09 2020
I dumped the idea of throwing the garbage in my neighbor's yard..
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︎ Sep 04 2020
Some people might think transparent cars seems like a cool idea, but I donβt.
I would steer clear of them.
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︎ Jul 15 2020
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