Because they take things literally
I mean, it's not hard.
But I love it when the sparks fly.
Because they photosympathize.
They're in a polyhammerous relationship.
After all, all conversations will end on a 10-4.
It’s about time...
I said whatever. It's what it's.
I really think Disney Villains are misunderstood. You have to respect how they pursue their passions. They usually have henchmen or “employees” so I’m guessing there’s a compensation system in place and they are managing a budget to fund all their evil campaigns. And what business model did they have to follow? Was there an Ursula before Ursula? I don’t think so. These villains are business visionaries and they deserve such respect.
...and right now, I literally Kant even.
He suddenly started talking in a Hyundai Accent.
- Dad jokes are not made to make you laugh they are only meant for dad(s)
- the louder the groan the better the joke.
- A pun and a dad joke ARE NOT THE SAME!!
- Having children gives you credibility not the right to tell dad jokes.
- Not all bad jokes are dad jokes but ALL dad jokes are bad jokes.
It's all becoming clear to me now
I'm away at university and my dad calls me up while I'm doing last minute homework:
Dad: What are you up to?
Me: Just finishing an essay about Dickens' Hard Times for class. I'm really busy, can I call you back in a couple hours?
Dad: Oh, that sounds like a hard time!
Me: (Sarcastically) Well it's not the MOST fun I've ever had.
Dad: (long pause followed by a sigh) Are you having a hard time with the joke?
Me: No, (chuckles) I get it dad... but I've got to go!
Dad: You sound like you're having a hard time.
Me: Dad, I got it.
Dad: (scoff) Ahhh, I'm just giving you a hard time!
Me: Dad.... I've got so much work to do.
Dad: I'll let you go then; glad to be of help during this hard time. Good luck on your essay! (hangs up)
Kleptomaniacs don’t really understand puns ... they take everything literally.
Mom(butting in): I think it's a Word processor...
Keep in mind English is my mom's second language and used to not understand puns or dry humor at all. I want to say I'm proud but I'm not sure that's how it works..
It's pointless.
It makes me sound more photosynthesis.
I said, “That makes two of us.”
But someone else said it was 1 in 5. So which is it?
It just doesn't add up.
Do you think it's stumped?
Too much MUMbling
Then I realised, it was on paws.
I think that's Booleshit.
He ate nothing but a hound dog.
Thank you, thank you very much.....
He said, "What do you mean by that?"
An octagon means stop, the triangle means slow down...
I thought dieting was a piece of cake.
I don’t what is so hard about it. I’m a trapped peas artist.
I told her to get under it!
I said, “No, it’s as easy as 1,1,2,3.
Jack and the beans talk!
My 2 year old has cereal in her snack cup and just showed me that there was a piece of cereal in her sleeve. I said, "Looks like you got some tricks up your sleeve." GUESS WHAT KIND OF CEREAL SHE WAS EATING!.....IT WAS TRIX!
Edit: Thanks for my first gold!
It's a total ripoff!
It's pointless.
Oh, no, wait, she's back. She just went for groceries.
My answer was spot on, upon being asked to give an example on a "Business being completely ruined due to carelessness" All I said was... "A Pregnant Prostitute"
Steven.
I guess they just find them irrelephant.
It is breathtaking.
It was an Apple with limited memory; just one byte. Then, everything crashed.
Because they take things literally.
Because they take things literally.
They take everything literally
Me: That makes two of us.
They always take things, literally.
It just doesn’t add up.
It just doesn’t add up
“No, it’s easy as 1,1,2, 3.”
It just doesn't add up
