Why do we have 2 butt cheeks?
Because they make a great asset.
If you cut your right butt cheek...
When you swim in the creek, and an eel bites your cheek
My boyfriend gave me a butt massage today, but only focused on one cheek...
What did one butt cheek say to the other?
Together we can stop this shit
Did you see Thor put some subtle rouge on his brother’s cheeks with just a hint of eye shadow?
I once saw an Egyptian pharaoh honk his horn and put his bum cheeks up to the window of his vehicle.
It was a toot and car moon.
What is it called when one butt cheek is bigger than the other?
So I walked into my daughter's room with a tape measure the other day, and she was lying on her bed reading a book. I stood in the doorway and started slowly extending the tape measure, all the way across the room, until it touched her cheek. "What??" she asked me. My response...
"I'm measuring your patience!"
My kid got sunburned on only one of their butt cheeks
My wife said I did a half ass job applying sunscreen
At one point, I had so much acne on my face, that a blind person mistook my right cheek for braille.
I was so embarrassed. Boy, was my face read
Is butt cheeks one word
Or should I spread them apart?
My aunt always put a wad of Copenhagen between her cheek and gun before swimming...
My brother visited the cemetery today to see our mom. He walked up to her grave stone, closed his eyes and with a tear running down his cheek, said
Look who’s grounded now, mom.
A woman goes to the doctor clutching her cheek...
The doctor asks “What’s the problem?”
The woman removes her her hand to reveal an area of green grass with a tree growing out of the middle, with some people in deck chairs picnicking next to a small lake.
“Oh that’s nothing to worry about” said the doctor, “its just a beauty spot”.
When I see names like this I turn the otter cheek.
What did one but cheek say to the other?
My daughter has a fungal rash on her cheek, so my wife calls her a mushroom when applying the ointment.
I tell my daughter, “It’s ok, I’m a fungi too!”
My wife and I were drinking wine last night, and she looked over to me and said: “Wow... your cheeks get really red when you drink wine, it could be Rosacea.”
I looked back and her and naturally said: “...actually it’s Cab.”
What did one butt cheek say to the other butt cheek when the cops pulled them over?
What do you call a mosquito sitting on your spouse’s cheek?
When your butt cheeks are different sizes...
So I just playfully licked my girlfriend on her cheek...
And my dad says "HEY. You can't do that without a liquor license."
What did one butt cheek say to the other butt cheek?
Between you and me, something stinks!
Did you see Thor put some subtle rouge on his brother’s cheeks with just a hint of eye shadow?
What did one butt cheek say to the other?
Together we can stop this shit
What did one butt cheek say to the other?
Together, we can stop this shit.
What did one butt cheek say to the other butt cheek?
Together we can stop this shit!
What did the left butt cheek say to the right butt cheek?
"If we stick together we can stop this shit!"
What did one butt cheek say to the other butt cheek?
If we stick together we can stop this crap!
What did one butt cheek say to the other butt cheek?
What did one butt cheek say to the other?
Nothing...it just cracked.
If I cut off my right butt cheek...
What did one butt cheek say to the other?
We can stop this shit together
What did the right butt cheek say to the left butt cheek?
If we stick together we can put a stop to this shit
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