What’s the difference between a baked sweet potato and a forcefully flying pig?

One is a heated yam, and the other is a yeeted ham.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Columbus_Explorer
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2021
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What did the baked couch potato do when the game console locked up?

He pressed the russet button, of course.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/centstwo
πŸ“…︎ Mar 31 2020
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What happened to the allergic baked potato?

It broke out in chives (Original content, thank you very much)

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πŸ‘€︎ u/pinkyporkchops
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2018
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What does Sean Connery put on his baked potato?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/logicson
πŸ“…︎ Nov 28 2017
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Did you head about the evil baked potato?

His plans were foiled.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/cheeto-bandito
πŸ“…︎ Mar 28 2018
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Baked Potato :) imgur.com/TOppM
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πŸ‘€︎ u/UnicornFvcker
πŸ“…︎ Dec 19 2012
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No wonder all my baked potatoes are so self-assured upsidedowngrin.com/collec…
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πŸ‘€︎ u/upsidedowngrincom
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2015
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Step out of the car
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πŸ‘€︎ u/spinnaker190
πŸ“…︎ Sep 24 2020
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What do you call a lazy person that’s stoned?

A baked potato.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThatOneBassGuy17
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2020
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she's my sweet potato
πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wolflambert
πŸ“…︎ Sep 08 2018
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Did you hear the one about the secret agent that was captured behind enemy lines with a sheepdog as part of his disguise?

When he was put to death, his captors ground him up and baked him in the oven covered in gravy and mashed potatoes.

When questioned as to why such a cruel and unusual punishment was administered, they stated that this was the only way to correctly execute a shepherd spy.

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πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2020
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What do you call an Irish stoner?

A baked potato.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/CoastalTW
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03 2020
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My Waitress Tonight Told I Had To Post This

Scene: Dinner for my mom's birthday at a very nice (expensive) restaurant.

Waitress: Your steak comes with a choice of the vegetable of the day or a twice baked potato.

Me: Are twice baked potatoes and refried beans prepared similar ways or is that just a naming coincidence?

W: Laughing Oh my God. Our bartender and I were just talking about funny "dad jokes" on reddit! I didn't expect to hear one in person. Do you use reddit?

M: Umm... Yeah... I actually follow r/dadjokes but I'm not a dad and

W: You should post that joke there!

I have no idea if she will see this but my wife said I had to let everyone know about a redditor interaction. I hope she does because the food was awesome and she was a fantastic waitress beyond being a fellow redditor.

I still have no idea if twice baked potatoes and refried beans have any link...

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πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2019
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What do you call an old computer that smokes weed?

A baked potato

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πŸ‘€︎ u/hoodja42
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2019
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scientists have inserted the gene for THC into yams

they can now grow baked potatoes

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πŸ‘€︎ u/berninicaco3
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
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Confused Mom and a belly laugh from Dad

We were eating dinner. Mom was complaining about her Wendy's broccoli & cheese baked potato. She quietly said "gee whiz...", so I give it a second and respond "no. CHEESE whiz."

After a few more seconds my mom mutters "whaaat?" while my Dad's face is contracting.

Unreasonably high levels of pride followed.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/r3ynoldswrap
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2014
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We were at Outback Steakhouse...

I asked the waiter what was on a dressed baked potato and my dad chimed in with "a suit and tie". The waiter and I lost it while the rest of my family stared.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/YourShoeIsUntied
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2014
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Bacon Puns

Why didn’t the drunk Mexican druglord find the Bacon Tree? Because he walked into a Ham Bush!


Whats green and smells like bacon? Β Kermit the Frog’s finger! Why do we cook bacon and bake cookies?


Why did the pig go into the kitchen? He felt like bacon.


Which actor is now being quarantined for Swine Flu? Β Kevin Bacon


If you can’t get Swine Flu from eating bacon what can you get? A1: Obesity A2: Heart Disease A3: Hardening of the Arteries


Whats the name of the movie about Bacon? A1: Frankenswine A2: Hamlet Why do pigs go to New York City? To see the Big Apple.


Why was the meat packer arrested? For bringing home the bacon.


What do you get when you cross a pig and a chicken? The best bacon-and-eggs of your life.


Why did the pig kill the farmer? To save his own bacon. What do you call a bacon wrapped dinosaur? Jurrasic Pork.


What do you call a pig that can tell you about his ancestors? History in the bacon.


How do they get up there? In pigup trucks. What do you get when you cross a pig and a centipede? Bacon and Legs.


What would happen if pigs could fly? The price of bacon would go skyrocket.


What did the boy bacon say to the girl bacon? Girl, you’re bacon my heart melt.


What are they warned to watch out for? Pigpockets.


First Carter Page and now Betsy DeVos. Trump’s cabinet is like a game of six degrees of Kevin Bacon except with Russia.


Everything must be wrapped in bacon, including bacon.


If Kevin Bacon doesn’t whisper β€œHere comes the Baconator” before he has sex all my faith in humanity is lost


I’ll acknowledge Canada Day when they finally acknowledge that’s not bacon


If Donald Trump really KNOWS the average WORKER then where are the pics of Trump hungover in 7-Eleven buying bacon in sweat pants?


This guy ordered a vegetarian sandwich and then added bacon. It was like watching someone have a mid-life crisis and then find a cool hobby.


If we don’t build a wall on our northern border, they’ll soon be maple syrup & Canadian bacon trucks on every corner.


I signed an Executive Order to make Saturday morning bacon and eggs and pancakes with triple butter and syrup non-fattening.


My bedroom smells like maple, bacon and beaver…because I’m Canadian.


When the waitress calls you Babycakes you know you’re getting extr

... keep reading on reddit ➑

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Punsville
πŸ“…︎ May 27 2017
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Froggy the Waiter

This isn't a joke that came from a dad or anything but I hope it's worthy!

My father started waiting in 1979 and took one of his first jobs at this extremely fancy and expensive restaurant. The type of place that the waiters wore tuxedos and whatnot. Anyways my dad worked with this guy named Froggy (nickname of course) whom my dad still praises to this day that he's one of the best waiters he's ever worked with.

Anyways, one night it's extremely busy and both my father and Froggy were rushing around trying to keep up. Well Froggy had this table with about 5-7 people all who looked like they wore expensive clothing, ordered the best food and so on. Well one of the guys ordered a baked potato as a side and Froggy proceeds with typical waiter stuff as asks if he wanted sour cream with his baked potato. The man says yes so Froggy scoops the cream and attempts to place it on the potato. Well... as he was moving to place it on, the cream slipped off and right onto this guys extremely expensive sweater... Completely in shock, the customer turns to Froggy and without missing a beat, Froggy slowly turns his head in a comical fashion towards the ceiling and proclaims "Those damn pigeons!"

Needless to say every single person in that table were crying with laughter, including my father one table over who observed the whole ordeal. Froggy said he'd pay for the dry cleaning and the customer said not to worry about it because it was the most hilarious thing he's seen in ages.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/KickedInTheHead
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2013
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Dad joked the wife over cooking...FTW

I've got oven preheated to 420f for baking sweet potatoes, wife course corrects and tells me she wants the oven set to 450f... "What, 420 isn't HIGH enough for you?"

Teenage kids reaction in the kitchen, priceless! Got a high-five from stepdaughter too!

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πŸ‘€︎ u/PaulyMcBee
πŸ“…︎ Apr 17 2014
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What do you call a potato that had too much pot?

A baked potato.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/UlvakSkillz
πŸ“…︎ Nov 29 2016
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