I bought some shoes from a drug dealer the other day. I don’t know what he laced them with but, I’ve been tripping all day....
My Cousin Blames Me For Him Tripping On His Own Driveway.
I don’t understand, it’s his own stupid asphalt.
I just saw my wife tripping and dropping a bunch of clothes she just ironed.
In my my neighbor's home, their huge dog frequently sleeps at the landing at the top of their tall staircase causing a possible tripping hazard. Good advice to them....
Persons in their household should watch their steps, particularly early risers.
What did the Dentist say when tripping balls on LSD?
I’m feeling pretty sore after tripping over some clams.
I think I might’ve pulled a mussel.
I was out in the desert on psychedelics , and I started tripping way too hard. So I took an acid reducer.
It didn't help me one bit!!!!
Look out for tripping hazards today.
It's the first day of Fall.
No laces but I'm still tripping
My friend said she's been tripping a lot lately
I told her she should visit tripadvisor.com
Why did the shoe keep tripping?
It was laced with something.
Did y'all here about the tripping scam?
Road-tripping with the family and coming up on the last rest stop for miles...
"Anyone need to go? Speak now or forever hold your pees!"
These seed pods that our daughter keeps tripping on suck!!
Me: yeah, they really are the pits!
I tripped on my wife's bra...
Always be aware of your surroundings. Even on your midnight toilet trips.
One time on a road trip we drove through Iowa and stopped at a farm around harvest time. I tried to speak to the farmer about buying some fresh corn 🌽 but he had no time for me.
“Sorry, mister,” he said. “I’m up to my ears in work.”
My trip to Oklahoma wasn't great.
What animal is the best at preparing for trips?
Elemphants, cause they are pachyderms.
A man and his boy are out on their first camping trip...
They get into a huge fight about the best way to start the camp fire.
The two sit in silence for a few moments, cold and frustrated
The dad promptly reaches into his backpack, grabs a pair of scissors and tears into the wall of their canvas shelter.
The son yells, "What the heck are you doing, you maniac?!!?!?"
The dad turns to him, looks him dead in the eyes, and says, "Just trying to cut the tent-son."
I once took a trip to Seattle on a plane in which the stewards only served candy made when peanut butter meets milk chocolate...
I don't know how far this Reese eating airline goes...
I looked into taking a trip to Norway in the next ten years...
*On a trip to Rome*
"Wait, did you say a cis teen built this chapel?"
When I left home to go on a business trip, my wife said "Don't forget to write"
I thought, "That's unlikely... it's a basic skill, isn't it?"
I’m planning a trip to the Farsi-speaking part of Ontario
I’ve always wanted to visit the Persian Guelph
What kind of tree nut is best to take out on the boat for an all day fishing trip?
A Pecan
but only if you pronounce it "pee can"
Why did the cyborg have to rest after his long road trip?
Because he had a hard drive
My brother and I both picked up bottles of mouthwash on the same grocery trip...
I guess you could say we really got our Acts together.
I took my laptop with me on a recent road trip.
Carnival is offering a deluxe trip where you leave your senior citizens and kids behind in the snow..
They are calling it “Ted Cruise”
What did the Parisian man say when he tripped?
My friend entered a contest to win a trip to a city on the French Riviera. He didn't win...
Well.. We made another trip around the sun.
But it's the earth's rotation that really makes my day.
Why was the camping trip so stressful?
Because it was in tents...
My buddy Miles went on a Europe trip after his graduation.
He loved the culture so much he changed his name to Kilometres.
Road trip - why did the Dad tell the kids to take out their pencil and pad?
The sign said Draw bridge.
My girlfriend and I have been really stressed and having some issues so we decided to take a mini vacation, a weekend trip to a ski resort.
Everything started off well, but things went downhill really fast.
After all my travel in 2020 was cancelled, I'm now facing the COVID reality that my Spring Break trip is not going to happen either. I just told my suitcases this sad fact...
...and now I'm dealing with the emotional baggage
Here's a step-by-step guide on how to fall down stairs!
Step 28
Step 27
Step 24
Step 21
Step 16
Step 12
Step 7
Step 3
Step 1
My friend David lost his ID during a trip.
Did you hear about the supermodels on a camping trip?
They were pretty in tents.
My lactose intolerant friend had some cheese at the beginning of our eight hour road trip today...
Just got back from a trip to Paris...
That tower of theirs is sure an Eiffel.
I bought a pair of shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with but I’ve been tripping all day.
So I bought some new shoes from a drug dealer yesterday. I don’t know what he laced them with but I’ve been tripping all day
I tripped over my wife's bra
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer today.
I don't know what he laced them with but I've been tripping all day.
I tripped over my wife’s bra...
Recently bought a pair of shoes from my local drug dealer...
Don’t know what he laced them with but I was tripping all day...
I just saw my wife trip over and drop a basket of clothes she just ironed.
I just saw my wife trip over and drop the basket of clothes she just ironed.
Tripped over my wife's bra.
I bought some shoes from my drug dealer
I don’t know what he laced them with but I’ve been tripping all day!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer...
Don't know what they were laced with, but I was tripping all day.
Never buy shoes from a drug dealer...
I don't know what he laced them with, but I've been tripping all day.
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