Iโ€™m feeling pretty sore after tripping over some clams.

I think I mightโ€™ve pulled a mussel.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 27
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/FinalCaveat
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 12 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I tripped over my wife's bra

It was a booby trap

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 65
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/joeytherealking
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 24 2021
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I just saw my wife trip over and drop a basket of clothes she just ironed.

I watched it all unfold.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 38
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 07 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
A pirate wanted to celebrate his captainโ€™s birthday, so he bought a large quantity of balloons while ashore. Back on the ship, he walked over to hand the balloons to the captain, but he tripped and most of them floated away. The captain said, โ€œArrr! That was a costly mistake...โ€

โ€œWe lost a lot of doubloons.โ€

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 4
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Unfussed
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 28 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I tripped over a box of Kleenex when coming home, needing an ER visit!

Don't worry--it's only tissue damage...

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/thomasbrakeline
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 14 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I tripped and fell down the steps this morning. My son comes running over asking "Daddy, are you alright?"

I said "No, son. I'm half left."

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 17
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Talorn_Celeron
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 20 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I tripped over something in the bathroom and nearly killed myself.

It was a toilet brush with death.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/ErwinFurwinPurrwin
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 17 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
During my trip to Madrid I was staying at this small motel when I grew pretty ill. Thankfully the people at the front desk sent the on call doctor over and he was able to fix me up real quick. I told him I didn't expect such a small place to have such a good doctor, to which he told me

Nobody expects the Spanish Inn Physician

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 18
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/RKO-Cutter
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 08 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I thought I broke my leg when I tripped over a box of Kleenex last night

But the doctor said it's only tissue damage.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 20
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/babblingbrooks1
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 05 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I was doing some work in the garden and tripped over a rock.

Damn it, I soiled myself.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Daintyoaktree
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Dec 10 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I tripped over my wife's bra left on the bedroom floor last night...

Damn boobie traps

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 103
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/dacs1306
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 03 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
For the longest time I couldnโ€™t figure out how I tripped over the remains of that tree.

I was stumped.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 34
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/mynickname86
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 22 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
What did Harry Potter say when he tripped over his broom?

"Ow !! I Hur'-my-knee !!"

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Allgen
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 22 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Did you hear about the chickpea that tripped over?

The fella fell

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/TurboAxolotl
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 11 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
The marine biologist tripped and the chum bucket spilled all over everything

It was an offal mess

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/The_Possum
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Sep 02 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I tripped over a floor tile at work today-

I got floored

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 3
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Spathens
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 11 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
A man from Paris trips over.

He says โ€œOh no! Eiffel!โ€

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Misterhijack420
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 18 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I tripped over my broom and bent the handle.

I haven't been sweeping well lately.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 12
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/accountnumber3
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 17 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Almost tripped over a beanstalk,

Nearly pead myself.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 12
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/fukhed69
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 23 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I took a trip over at Orion's Belt.

Customer service asked me how my experience was. So I answered, "It wasn't the best place, but it was definitely 3 stars."

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Majike03
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 08 2017
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
What do you call a chicken who trips over its own feet?

Scrambled legs.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 16
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/electropriest
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 22 2017
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
We will never run out of puns now!

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. Itโ€™s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind itโ€™s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I donโ€™t think itโ€™s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

Thereโ€™s a new type of broom out, itโ€™s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels canโ€™t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, itโ€™s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldnโ€™t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didnโ€™t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit โžก

show more
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 22
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/communist_scumbag
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 26 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
My wife to me before our trip over-seas

I am a very messy teeth-brusher and some toothpaste was leaking out of my mouth and onto the sink.

Her: "You need to stop dribbling." Me: "Why?" Her: "So we can travel."

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/bad_karma11
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 16 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Robber attempts to escapes after attempting to rob a bank

However, he was running too fast and trips over the stairs on the way out and broke his spine.

You could say he ran at a break neck speed.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/thekuecker
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 22 2021
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Was flying over the Netherlands on a trip to Europe with my dad leans in all very seriously and whispers...

Where do Gerbil go on vacation?

Hamsterdam

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 20
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/World_Chaos
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 23 2015
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I went on a school trip over the weekend, where there was one guy always trying to get everyone to laugh

At one place where we'd stopped for lunch, several people noticed a butt-print on the back of one of our vehicles, and this guy looking rather amused with himself. Once everyone had noticed and was aware of the situation, he proudly said, "Well, looks like the van got rear ended!"

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 62
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Elyezabeth
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ May 21 2014
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
My friend dropped this one as we were driving over a bridge on a road trip across the state

"hey guys did you know that bridges generate static electricity? When we get over the center of the bridge touch the window"

We all touch the windows even though we have no idea where he is going.

"do you feel it? Do you feel the pane?"

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 51
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/cortexgunner92
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 26 2014
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Crossed a bridge over Goose Creek on a road trip

I turned to my girlfriend and said, "Look! Goose creek!"

After crossing over it and not seeing much i said, "Wasn't much to gander."

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 9
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/DJReddyRed
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 14 2014
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
So my kids want to become a Boy Band

I went to their first practice, and they spent the whole time tripping over each other while trying to dance.

I guess they weren't N-Sync.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Calmfan5
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jun 11 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Long story about a tragedy that once happened to me.

A couple of years ago, one night, I was about to propose to my girlfriend when my roommate Joseph barged into the porch out of nowhere, tripped and fell over, breaking a glass table with his face. Totally ruined the mood. Now, I didn't know Joseph THAT well, don't even remember where he was from, but let' just say I put my plans on hold to help him through his injuries.

Joseph had gotten big glass shard in his eye, making him completely blind in that eye. He was walking around with one of those cotton pads on his eye for a couple of months. Then suddenly, he disappeared, along with my girlfriend

Apparently they'd bonded during the time after his injuries, and eloped together , left me behind without as much as a note. I tried to track them down, but never could.

In conclusion, if it hadn't been for cotton eye Joe, I'd have been married a long time ago. Where did you come from, where did you go? Where did you come from, cotton eye Joe?

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 8
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/mickerallen100
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 14 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Tom absolutely loves tractors

A little boy named Tom was approaching his 3rd birthday, and absolutely adored the show "Tractor Tom", partially because of his name being spoken, and partially because he loved tractors.

As the day drew nearer, his parents decided to buy him a toy tractor as a gift. The rest of his toys were gone with the wind at this point, as Tom spent all his waking hours playing with this one tractor toy.

Fast forward a few years, and Tom's now approaching his 10th birthday, with his love for tractors intact and intensified. His parents discuss what to get for him, and decide that a ride-on tractor to replace his bike is the best gift they can give him.

Tom absolutely loves the gift, and spends all of his time out of school riding around the neighbourhood while his bike collects dust in the garage.

We come forward a few more years, as Tom approaches his 18th birthday, with an only intensified adoration of tractors. His father pulls him aside on the morning of his birthday, saying "Now son, I know that we've promised you a car, but we know what you really want."

He leads him outside, to a brand new tractor with a bow on it, saying that this is his welcome to adulthood.

Tom is beyond excited, and spends the next few months going everywhere in his tractor - grocery trips, bars, classes, friends' houses.....

Again, a few years later, Tom is driving down a back country road, in the middle of nowhere, with his tractor, in the middle of a storm. The tractor breaks down, and with no air conditioning or any form of modern comforts, Tom is in a miserable mood until someone finally comes past for him to flag down for help. After this, Tom realises that although tractors are fun, maybe they're not the best transport method out there.

Tom ages through a few more years, and finds himself driving down another road in the middle of nowhere in his car, and sees a house on fire just off the road. Being a good samaritan, he pulls over and heads up the driveway to a woman running out of the house screaming "Please, help, help! My baby is trapped in there! Go and call 911, please!"

Tom turns around, then, before leaving, has a brainwave.

He turns back and walks towards the flames, saying "Don't worry, ma'am, I've got this."

He takes a deep breath in, and the fire disappears into nothingness. As you'd expect, the woman is in awe, and asks, "Oh my God, how did you do that?!"

Tom simply responds, "Well you see ma'am, I'm an extractor fan."

show more
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 7
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Asurarkt
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 09 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I tripped over my wifeโ€™s bra...

It was a booby trap

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 69
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/3cansofbeans
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jan 20 2021
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I just saw my wife trip over and drop the basket of clothes she just ironed.

I watched it all unfold.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 144
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/porichoygupto
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 15 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
Tripped over my wife's bra.

It was a booby trap.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2k
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/gustavotherecliner
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 07 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I walked into the bedroom today and tripped over my wifeโ€™s bra.

It was a booby trap.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 55
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Bakedschwarzenbach
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 19 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I tripped over my girlfriends bra

seemed to be a booby trap.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 993
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/rickmartingt
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 29 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I tripped over my wifeโ€™s bra today,

It was a booby trap.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 5
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Partybomber3214
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Jul 22 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I tripped over my wife's bra

It was a booby trap

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 15
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/southwoodhunter
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Feb 20 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I tripped over my wife's bra....

...It seemed to be a booby trap.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 493
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Owlbear15
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 17 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I tripped over my girlfriend's bra.

It was a booby trap.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 14
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Ketchupchilli
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Apr 08 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I tripped over my girlfriends bra

seemed to be a booby trap.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 2
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/rickmartingt
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Oct 28 2019
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I walked into my wife's room and tripped over her bra...

It was a booby trap.

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 17
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/Just_John_
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Aug 14 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
I walked into the bedroom today and tripped over my wifeโ€™s bra...

It was a booby trapโ€ฆ

๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 15
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/madazzahatter
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Mar 17 2018
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report
A giant list of puns from r/copypasta

A giant list of puns

What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.

I would avoid the sushi if I was you. Itโ€™s a little fishy.

Want to hear a joke about paper? Nevermind itโ€™s tearable.

Why did the cookie cry? Because his father was a wafer so long!

I used to work in a shoe recycling shop. It was sole destroying.

What do you call a belt with a watch on it? A waist of time.

How do you organize an outer space party? You planet.

I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.

Do you know where you can get chicken broth in bulk? The stock market.

I cut my finger chopping cheese, but I think that I may have greater problems.

My cat was just sick on the carpet, I donโ€™t think itโ€™s feline well.

Why did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? Because it was well armed.

How much does a hipster weigh? An instagram.

What did daddy spider say to baby spider? You spend too much time on the web.

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

Thereโ€™s a new type of broom out, itโ€™s sweeping the nation.

What cheese can never be yours? Nacho cheese.

What did the Buffalo say to his little boy when he dropped him off at school? Bison.

Have you ever heard of a music group called Cellophane? They mostly wrap.

Why does Superman gets invited to dinners? Because he is a Supperhero.

How was Rome split in two? With a pair of Ceasars.

The shovel was a ground breaking invention.

A scarecrow says, "This job isn't for everyone, but hay, it's in my jeans."

A Buddhist walks up to a hot dog stand and says, "Make me one with everything."

Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body? He's alright now.

What do you call a girl with one leg that's shorter than the other? Ilene.

I did a theatrical performance on puns. It was a play on words.

What do you do with a dead chemist? You barium.

I bet the person who created the door knocker won a Nobel prize.

Towels canโ€™t tell jokes. They have a dry sense of humor.

Two birds are sitting on a perch and one says "Do you smell fish?"

Do you know sign language? You should learn it, itโ€™s pretty handy.

What do you call a beautiful pumpkin? GOURDgeous.

Why did one banana spy on the other? Because she was appealing.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef.

What do you call a cow with all of its legs? High steaks.

A cross eyed teacher couldnโ€™t control his pupils.

After the accident, the juggler didnโ€™t have the balls to do it.

I used to be afraid of hu

... keep reading on reddit โžก

show more
๐Ÿ‘๏ธŽ 6
๐Ÿ’ฌ๏ธŽ
๐Ÿ‘ค๏ธŽ u/HornyBastard37484739
๐Ÿ“…๏ธŽ Nov 26 2020
๐Ÿšจ๏ธŽ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.