Oh sheet.. look at my S!
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HovadoMoravske
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Google sheets
πŸ‘︎ 1k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/T1_L
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
My uncle's friend won the Olympic gold with an epee made from a disposable thin metal sheet often used in cooking...

It was a good aluminum foil

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2020
🚨︎ report
A midget escaped from prison by using bed sheets tied together and scaled down the outside wall. He left a note detailing his escape plan, highlighting the prison guards stupidity and incompetence.

The Warden said "he's a little condescending"

πŸ‘︎ 14
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πŸ‘€︎ u/johnblu5
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Did I tell you that I excel between the sheets?
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Overlordbb
πŸ“…︎ Jul 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I told me son he was a big pile of sheet

It was more of a blanket statement.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Cauterberri
πŸ“…︎ Jun 25 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the sheet factory?

It folded

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tungur_Knivur2020
πŸ“…︎ Jun 23 2020
🚨︎ report
Gloria in Excel sheets Deo
πŸ‘︎ 59
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πŸ‘€︎ u/johnny2_yespapa
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2019
🚨︎ report
A freak in the sheets.
πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/7sterling
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2020
🚨︎ report
Have You Ever Tried to Fold a Fitted Sheet?

It's pointless.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Calicorpse
πŸ“…︎ Mar 16 2020
🚨︎ report
I bought a discount bed sheet off of Facebook.

Turned out to be a sham...

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Grimstache
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Dryer sheet
πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bad-gamer35
πŸ“…︎ Mar 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I wanted to try a different method when putting sheets on my bed

But I just made it up as I went along.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/leeericewing
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2020
🚨︎ report
I had an employee at the hotel that ironed the bed sheets. I noticed that as the days wore on, the number of sheets ironed was going down.

Her job performance was de-creasing.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ May 14 2020
🚨︎ report
... in Excel sheet Deo!
πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/potatostomach
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Someone keeps putting very thin sheet metal around my garden...

They keep foiling my plot!

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01 2020
🚨︎ report
Our toddler woke us up, ripping the sheet off our bed last night...

... it’s ok but, we recovered.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 07 2020
🚨︎ report
I just want to wear a sheet out in public

Is that sarong?

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ja-mez
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2019
🚨︎ report
Oh Sheet.
πŸ‘︎ 473
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Hamees007
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2018
🚨︎ report
Wow I was a wreck last night -- t-shirt under sweat clothes, under two cotton sheets, under a polypropylene comforter, and a quilt on top of that! I could NOT get warm!

I can't imagine how miserable I'd be if I didn't have that can of Pringles in the cupboard....

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Naitraen
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear the joke about a sheet of paper?

It was terrible.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sprocketvgc
πŸ“…︎ Feb 05 2020
🚨︎ report
My pet viper swallowed a sheet of window glass causing the snake severe physical discomfort.

It was a real pane in the asp.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DreadMoor
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
🚨︎ report
I watched an interesting documentary about how to fasten two sheets of metal together.

It was riveting.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RegalBen56
πŸ“…︎ Aug 21 2019
🚨︎ report
Oh sheet.
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MovinPerera
πŸ“…︎ Jun 24 2019
🚨︎ report
I'm way, way too proud of my company's April Fool's bit: YOUcalyptusβ„’, a brand new brand by Sheets & Gigglesβ„’ imgur.com/gallery/JolTuiG
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SheetsGiggles
πŸ“…︎ Apr 01 2019
🚨︎ report
I lost my job as a sheet metal worker.

I don't know what happened but I gave it my awl.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Apollonius_Cone
πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2019
🚨︎ report
While browsing the bookshop, I stuck a sheet of A4 paper to my wife's spine.

She said she wanted a paperback for her birthday.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2019
🚨︎ report
I once played Texas Hold Em against a sheet of paper.

It folded.

πŸ‘︎ 16
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bonanza86
πŸ“…︎ Jun 12 2019
🚨︎ report
How did the sheet music theft know how to steal music so well?

He started off by taking notes

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DavdHale
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2019
🚨︎ report
I just finished a great documentary about the process by which metal sheets are fastened together with steel bolts.

It was riveting.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/the_iraq_such_as
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2019
🚨︎ report
*covers face with sheets*

FiBEr OPtiCks

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/fat-bandit
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2018
🚨︎ report
They just don’t give a sheet . . .
πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dweeston
πŸ“…︎ Sep 23 2018
🚨︎ report
I once accidentally sat down on a sheet of glass

It was a massive pane in my ass

πŸ‘︎ 56
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Idlehackss
πŸ“…︎ May 09 2018
🚨︎ report
I was talking to my boyfriend about difficult it was for my band to sight read sheet music by Stevie Wonder.

He said "of course it's hard, he was blind you know!"

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/vsaholic
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31 2019
🚨︎ report
I just watched a video on joining two pieces of sheet metal together. It was riveting.

I didn't watch the hole thing though. That would be boring.

πŸ‘︎ 62
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RichardHuman
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2017
🚨︎ report
Is a Sheet Rocker...

a Ghost with a guitar?

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/slowshot
πŸ“…︎ Dec 05 2018
🚨︎ report
Someone tried to steal my silk sheets and replace them with a cheaper fabric.

Not today, satin.

Not today.

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NeverBob
πŸ“…︎ Jul 17 2018
🚨︎ report
People keep telling me that sheets and comforters are so great.

But I think those are just blanket statements.

πŸ‘︎ 60
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KyleMistry
πŸ“…︎ Jul 15 2013
🚨︎ report
What did one sheet of plywood say to the one right next to it?

We’re totally screwed.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/roguespectre67
πŸ“…︎ Dec 23 2017
🚨︎ report
My wife was asking where the baking sheet for pizzas was...

I responded, "Well, I dunno, but if it was a pizza sheet, then I probably threw it away."

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/flumanchu
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2018
🚨︎ report
I had the same sheets on my bed for five years, but last night they ripped. Today I put new sheets on my bed.

I shed a tear.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PhilNHoles
πŸ“…︎ Jun 17 2018
🚨︎ report
I tried telling a bunch of jokes about knocked-over plywood sheets.

They all fell flat.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Philboyd_Studge
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2018
🚨︎ report

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