I've been wearing this mask for so long, I wasn't sure I'd even be able to get rid of it.
Why did Mozart get rid of his chickens?
They kept saying Bach, Bach.
Why did the witch get rid of her new broom?
It was a bit thin and she couldn't get used to driving a stick.
I'm having trouble getting rid of my old magazines.
What do you call a scary icing that you can't get rid of?
I decided not to get rid of my tumor anymore
I dont know why, i guess it just grew on me
My wife said she wanted to try and get rid of her love handles...
I said she'll look stupid without any ears 👂
Why did The conservative get rid of his alarm clock?
Because every morning it wanted him to get woke
No matter what shampoo I use, I can’t seem to get rid of my dandruff.
It’s a real head scratcher.
So they're getting rid of the essay portion of the SAT
Just calling it the T exam now.
After a few uses, I decided to get rid of my vacuum.
How do you get rid of a witch’s hex?
Why would Biden get rid of Trump's Muslim Travel Band ?
I didn't even get to hear them play live yet
We are so happy to finally be rid of 2020
But next year will be 2022
(Inspired by the latest joke I read here by u/callingYouForMoney )
Getting rid of an annoying crease on a piece of paper is pretty easy.
All you have to do is wait, eventually it’ll crease to exist!
I finally came up with a plan to get rid of the ice on my driveway
I have it all thawed out.
Who do you call when you want to get rid of wrinkles
"What part of your body would you get rid of?"
"My spine. It holds me back."
If you take a dozen cows and get rid of two you'll have nine
There would be 10 but they lacked 8
I got rid of my son’s drum kit but he went behind my back and bought a new one.
There’s going to be serious repercussions.
I used to own a Subaru. I never should’ve gotten rid of it.
Did you hear about the guy who got rid of his vacuum cleaner?
It was just gathering dust.
Sorry. Won't do another vacuum joke. They suck.
getting rid of this lifestyle bc out of date
How do you get rid of a Witch in the desert?
I usually toast my sand Witches.
How did the bagel shop owner get rid of the competition on his block?
He ran a pretty intense schmear campaign
Help! I started arranging them by artist but that wasn’t right. Then by title, but that wasn’t right either. Nor by colour. Nor alphabetically by first track title. Finally, I arranged them by number of tracks, but I just couldn’t get them in the right order. So I got rid of them all. Do I have 0CD?
Have you heard the joke about getting rid of covid?
You could say, I’ve never gotten rid of my bad vices
How do you get rid of someone’s dirty thoughts?
I can't believe my wife wanted me to get rid of my silt collection!
It's like she doesn't understand the sedimental value!
If I had to get rid of one body part it would be my spine
Sometimes I feel like it's holding me back
How do you get rid of fleas?
I'm thinking about getting rid of my spine
It's always holding me back.
I had a real problem when your mom got rid of that crooked chair my dad made.
I don't know why, it just never sat right with me.
I got rid of that hair lice I've been having for a couple weeks the other day.
That problem's finally out of my hair.
Did you hear about the government scheme to get rid of deodorant?
They said that they are going to axe body spray.
What do priests say to get rid of insects in the church?
My friend declared bankruptcy and disappeared to get rid of all his bills...
My brother wanted to stop getting his hair cut for 6 months, but now he doesn't want to get rid of his long hair anymore...
I got another wrist watch for my birthday, so I wanted to get rid of the old ones. Looking through how many I had
I decided to give them a new purpose and turn them into a nice belt. But it ended up being too short.
This whole project was a waist of time.
It's my dream to become the CEO of Subway, if for no other reason than to get rid of the horrible job title "Sandwich Artist."
I just feel like they need a more accurate job title, like Sub Humans.
Everyone was really excited when we got rid of the dynamite by burying it.
What does an ant take to get rid of heartburn?
An antacid
I'm a single mom so I feel its ok for me to post this (and it made my daughter facepalm)
My dad is always embarrassed about cutting himself while getting rid of his beard, so he locks himself in the bathroom...
I guess he’s just trying to shave face…
If I had to get rid of one part of my body, I'd get rid of my spine.
Sometimes I feel like it's holding me back.
"what part of your body would you get rid off?"
"My spine, It holds me back."
I finally got rid of my head lice
That problem's outta my hair
Why did Mozart get rid of his chickens?
All they could say was BACH!
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