Have you heard the one about the bad pole vaulter
It never goes over very well
People act like the North and South poles are exactly the same
...but really, thereβs a whole world of differences between them.
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︎ Dec 16 2020
Did you hear about the red-haired elf in the baking dept. at the North Pole?
Heβs a gingerbread man.
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︎ Dec 21 2020
What is the deadliest vegetable at the North Pole?
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︎ Dec 21 2020
Iβve always wondered what itβs like to be a telephone pole...
I bet it would be electrifying
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︎ Dec 08 2020
How do you clean your hands at the North Pole?
You use hand Santa-tizer.
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︎ Dec 18 2020
Why is everyone thirsty at the north pole?
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︎ Dec 18 2020
A group of bedazzled tarps and a bunch of poles walk into a restaurant and order some stakes....
Things became pretty tents.
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︎ Dec 05 2020
I asked my psychiatrist for an update on my phobia of becoming a wooden pole
She said, I'll keep you posted...
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︎ Oct 31 2020
Did you hear that the latest north pole expedition was ended two weeks early?
They got there ok but then things went south.
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︎ Sep 29 2020
As I was walking down the street, I noted a man with a large pole in his hand and stopped to ask, "Are you a pole-vaulter?"
His response was, "No, I'm German, but how did you know my name was Walter?"
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︎ Oct 02 2020
How is everyone staying safe during the pandemic at the north pole?
They use a lot of hand santatizer.
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︎ Oct 10 2020
An American, an Armenian, an Australian, an Austrian, a Burmese, a Chinese, a Canadian, a Dutchman, a Dane, an Englishman, an Estonian, a German, a Japanese, a Korean, a Mexican, a Nepalese, a Pole, a Russian, and a Welshman all walk into a posh bar. The doorman says sorry, we have standards.
You canβt come in without a Thai.
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︎ Sep 23 2020
Why do polar bears live only in the north pole?
Because if it also lived in the south pole it would be bipolar
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︎ Aug 13 2020
What did one fishing pole say to the other?
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︎ Sep 17 2020
What is the name of the polar bear therapist living at the north pole?
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︎ Sep 07 2020
A pole to help with your next debate
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︎ May 16 2020
Ever heard of the polar bear that lives on both north & south poles, is manic depressive and attracted to both sexes?
Hes known as the bi-polar bi-polar bi polar bear.
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︎ Aug 04 2020
Did you hear about the man who invented a more efficient way to set up the high jump and pole vault?
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︎ May 26 2020
My friend was very irritated because his fishing pole broke and he had to wind up the fishing line manually.
He was being a reel crank.
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︎ Jun 11 2020
I have a friend who was born on October 10th. Every year for his birthday I get him a 3 foot long pole. He hates it.
It might be stupid, but 10/10 wood post again.
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︎ Oct 10 2019
I walked into a pole
Iβve now got post traumatic stress
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︎ Jun 23 2020
Why did the turtle retire and move to the south pole?
He couldn't handle any more hare-racing adventures
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︎ Mar 22 2020
I can't believe someone stole my limbo pole the other day...
I mean, how low can you go?
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︎ Jan 06 2020
So I saw a group of people crossing the street tonight carrying ski stuff the one guy in the front of the group was tasked with carrying the ski poles...
So I guess you can say that they put him in pole position
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︎ Dec 21 2019
Please help: taking a pole
Just don't tell anyone, I'll return it shortly
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︎ May 11 2020
What do you call a bear that has been to both the north and south poles?
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︎ Mar 03 2020
I took a pole today and found out that 100% of people get upset when a tent falls on top of them.
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︎ Sep 18 2019
I almost caught a fish today, but my fishing pole wouldnβt pull it in properly.
It was a reel bad situation.
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︎ May 06 2020
Someone broke into my garage last night and stole my limbo pole.
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︎ Mar 20 2020
Thereβs a guy in a European airport, and he sees a man carrying a ten foot metal pole. He asks the guy, βAre you a pole vaulter?β
The man says, βActually, Iβm German, but how did you know my name is Walter?β
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︎ Apr 03 2020
How do you get a one-armed man down from a flag pole?
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︎ Jan 31 2020
On my yacht, I make one of the crew dress in cute costume to stand for the pole supporting the yards, booms, and rigging...
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︎ Jan 28 2020
Friend of mine at work won a fishing pole and tackle box at the Christmas party.
He drives a mustang and was trying to figure out how to get it in his car.
Friend: βHow do I get this thing in my car? Itβs almost as tall as I am!β
Me: βGuess youβre just gonna have to angle it.β
Friend and everyone in a 30 foot radius: -groan and facepalm-
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︎ Dec 23 2019
I once went on a trip to the North Pole.
It all went south from there.
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︎ Nov 29 2019
Why is it hard to keep secrets in the North Pole?
Because your teeth chatter
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︎ Nov 24 2019
A guy broke into my garage and stole my limbo pole last night...
Seriously, how low can you go?!
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︎ Oct 10 2019
My girlfriend visited both the North Pole and the South Pole this month
I guess you could say sheβs bipolar
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︎ Dec 21 2019
A bear that lives in both the North Pole and South Pole...
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︎ Nov 28 2019
I have a friend who was born on May 7th. Every year for his birthday I re-gift him a pristine 3 foot long fence pole. He hates it, but I have a perfect record.
It might be stupid, but it's a perfect 5/7, wood repost again.
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︎ May 07 2019
I have a friend who was born on October 10th. Every year for his birthday I get him a 3 foot long fence pole. He hates it.
It might be stupid, but 10/10 wood post again.
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︎ Nov 20 2018
Why did the turtle retire and move to the south pole?
He couldn't handle any more hare-racing adventures
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︎ Mar 22 2020
I have a friend who was born on October 10th. Every year for his birthday I get him a 3 foot long fence pole. He hates it.
It might be stupid, but 10/10 wood post again.
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︎ Oct 10 2019
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