Had a blonde moment
Or something like that.
The young guy says, “That’s okay. It’s a coincidence. I’m looking for my wife, too. I can’t find her and I’m getting a bit anxious.”
The old guy says, “Well maybe we can help each other. What does your wife look like?"
The young guy says, “She is 28 years-old, tall, with brown hair, blue eyes, long legs, big boobs and she’s wearing tight white shorts. What does your wife look like?”
The old guy says, “Doesn't matter, let’s look for yours.”
I’ll try harder in 2018.
I worked right thru my coffee break !
They both require having no extra THOTs.
"You're all a bunch of phonies!"
I was playing a video game, and the protagonist mutters "I don't remember this place."
Dad: "I don't either!"
Me: "Maybe you should pay attention more!"
Dad: "Eh, Attention doesn't deserve the money."
One example of this was his tendency to drive down One Way roads, going the opposite direction.
My mother would say, "Hun, it's a one way road."
To which he'd respond, "Good thing I'm only going one way."
Aware Wolf
Turns out it was a big dill. I’m allergic.
they're always like, "Notes me, senpai"
But I dont have any money
Crickets.
She then said I need to pay more attention at school pick up.
Me: So Stop, Collaborate, and Listen?
I never pay attention
“Pay attention, I think this may be the mane event!”
The head veterinarian at a zoo noticed something alarming in a patient’s record. A monkey that had been a healthy weight at its last checkup was now recorded as being only half that.
Fearing for the monkey’s health, he went and saw it, expecting it to be sickly and skeletal. However, the monkey seemed totally normal. Confused told his staff to weigh the monkey again.
They did, but the number they reported was still astonishingly low. Sure it was a mistake, he went to weigh the monkey for himself. But when he put the monkey on the scale, it showed a number that was still far too low, and couldn’t possibly be right.
After a moment he spotted the problem: behind the scale was a grab bar on the wall, and the monkey had stealthily grabbed it with its tail, and was supporting some of its weight off the scale that way.
So the monkey's weight was fine, they just weren't paying attention to de tail.
I told her, "I do pay attention. I just don't always leave a very good tip."
What a strange way to start a conversation with me...
What is often characterized as a very conservative organization has taken a stance against racism. I'm not surprised at all though. To anyone who's been paying attention, from its very beginnings, NASCAR has always been veering to the left.
A few minutes later she came back and my husband wasn’t paying attention so I said “give her another, dad.” And he responded with “what’s wrong with the dad she’s got?”
One's a crusty bus station and the other's a busty crustacean.
sees you later or in a while.
I never pay attention
She then said I need to pay more attention at school pick up.
She said I need to pay more attention at school pick up.
By paying attention to whether it sees you later, or in a while
by paying attention to whether the animal sees you later or in a while.
by paying attention to whether the animal sees you later or in a while
