A relatable inanimate object pun that I drawded.
πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2019
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My friend and I started a business where we weigh tiny objects.

It’s a small scale operation.

πŸ‘︎ 45
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 30 2020
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What is the object oriented way to get wealthy?

Inheritance.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MjarjoSAC11
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2020
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My wife is such a sex object.

Every time I want sex, she objects.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/psburrito
πŸ“…︎ Nov 24 2020
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A report just came out exposing how the government's mishandling of an explosive object could've caused the deaths of hundreds of civilians

It was a bombshell

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MRTJ115
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2020
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I have started freezing different objects at -273.15Β°c and blowing them up. Seeing with items reacted differently.

I call it the 0k boomer experiment.

πŸ‘︎ 9k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Anthonybrose
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2020
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My wife got mad at me for have sexual affairs with inanimate objects

I told her it was one night stand...

πŸ‘︎ 137
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πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2020
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We preserve objects very well these days.

Soon, artefacts may just become a thing of the past.

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πŸ‘€︎ u/Artifcial_autism
πŸ“…︎ Sep 12 2020
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Who would run a country where there are only objects used for geometrical drawing?

The Supreme Ruler.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Alepanino
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2020
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My wife said I can't treat people like objects.

I'm not so sure I can live with that.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zachpledger
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2020
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What is the most sexual object in the world?

A door, because it wont stop banging the frame.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SirSnuffy
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2020
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The Muppets teamed up with NASA to name a newly discovered celestial object.

Upon its first sighting, the Jim Henson Company issued a press release, "Comet Defrog here."

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/salawm
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2020
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This one weird object will literally shock you!
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ“…︎ Jun 08 2020
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A clock is the most likely object to get corona

because it always has its hands on it's face

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thatsgregbuddy
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2020
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It’s funny they call them β€œunidentified flying objects”

I could identify them right away. those are ufos.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/bbloobr
πŸ“…︎ Apr 30 2020
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If you die from smoking weed does that mean that you were killed by a blunt object?
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πŸ‘€︎ u/moses10960
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11 2020
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How do flat round throwing objects sort their opinional differences?

A Discussion

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Assfrontation
πŸ“…︎ Mar 23 2020
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I think I lost my sense of object permanence

Never mind its back

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jimi444
πŸ“…︎ Feb 02 2020
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Why are three-dimensional objects so good at cutting down trees?

They have three axes.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/whomikehidden
πŸ“…︎ Jan 18 2020
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Them: Don’t treat women like objects

Me: Women women = new Women();

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/paoerfuuul
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2019
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I just found out that a circle is the most pointless object
πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jwp04
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2019
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I made an object that simulates how something travels downhill

I called it a roll model

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LashGips
πŸ“…︎ Aug 25 2019
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What fee is connected to every wedding and no-one objects?

Photography

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Soylent_X
πŸ“…︎ Oct 06 2019
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My wife was just swapping out objects on the mantle, and my son asked why she was putting bamboo up there.

I told him she was decorating for Halloween, and they both just gave me a flat look. Then with a grin on my face I simply said bamBOO!! Much to my wife’s dismay my 6 year old has been repeating it for the last 20 minutes.

πŸ‘︎ 190
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lancer611
πŸ“…︎ Oct 25 2018
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β€œDear Diary, I think I have trouble distinguishing between inanimate objects and human beings.”

My therapist: Yes, I see that. Stop calling me Diary.

πŸ‘︎ 26
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jun 03 2019
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A 1-D object and a 2-D object walk into a bar

The 1-D object turns to the 2-D object

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/S4T4N1C
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2019
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Why is it painful when you're hit with a vibrating object?

Because it Hertz.

πŸ‘︎ 15
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mukundan_chariar
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2018
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What happens when an unstoppable force meets an immovable object?

They shake hands.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/broodjebushalte
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2019
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What do scientists use to study high speed objects running into each other from a safe distance?

A collideoscope

πŸ‘︎ 12
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πŸ‘€︎ u/LeafyOneTwo
πŸ“…︎ Aug 10 2018
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Bells are really obedient objects.

They only sound off when they are tolled.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/gravydae420
πŸ“…︎ Apr 16 2019
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Have you heard about those new glasses that only focus on blunt objects

I can't see the point

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TannedCroissant
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2018
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Wonder what they’d call a collection of exactly 1009 assorted objects back in Ancient Rome
πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ErikMFoss
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17 2019
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My eye doctor is concerned because I keep walking headlong into objects...

He thinks it's a matter of life and depth.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 07 2019
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My friends and I started a business where we weigh tiny objects. reddit.com/r/3amjokes/com…
πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MrMakeItAllUp
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06 2019
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I've always gotten small shocks when touching metal objects, but that stopped recently.

Needless to say, I'm ex-static.

πŸ‘︎ 127
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zamoose
πŸ“…︎ Jan 10 2017
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What is the shortest object in the living room?

The pil-low.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Pdonkey
πŸ“…︎ Dec 29 2018
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My friend and I started a business where we weigh microscopic objects.

It’s a small scale operation.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/BillyBob_TX
πŸ“…︎ Nov 07 2020
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I just started a business where we specialize in weighing tiny objects.

It’s a small scale operation.

πŸ‘︎ 10k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Feb 17 2020
🚨︎ report
I've just started a business where I weigh tiny objects.

It's a small scale operation

πŸ‘︎ 43
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πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2020
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My friend and I just started a business where we weigh tiny objects.

It’s a small scale operation.

πŸ‘︎ 7k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 08 2019
🚨︎ report
I call my wife the sex object.

Anytime i want sex, she objects.

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/mrcharlesboyle
πŸ“…︎ Jun 02 2020
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My friends and I started a business where we weigh really tiny objects.

It’s a small scale operation.

πŸ‘︎ 30
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2019
🚨︎ report
I just started my own business where we weigh tiny objects.

It’s a small scale operation.

πŸ‘︎ 326
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2019
🚨︎ report
My friend and I started a business where we weigh tiny objects.

It’s a small scale operation.

πŸ‘︎ 173
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Nov 09 2018
🚨︎ report
I always used to get small shocks when touching metal objects, but it recently stopped.

Needless to say, I'm ex-static.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Eleventhearlofmar
πŸ“…︎ Oct 04 2018
🚨︎ report

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