i went to a restaurant and the waitress threw a piece of meat on the ceiling. she offered me $100 to go and get it off and i replied:

No, the steaks are too high!

👍︎ 7
💬︎
👤︎ u/mferrari24
📅︎ Oct 19 2020
🚨︎ report
My local meat market is offering Wookie meat

it's chewy

👍︎ 10
💬︎
👤︎ u/bibs4353
📅︎ Mar 06 2020
🚨︎ report
I was in a farmer's kitchen.

He was showing me his food. He grabbed a slab of meat from the fridge and dropped it down on the counter in front of me. "This meat is from the best cows in town," he said.

I said, "It's a nice offer, but tell them they haven't cooked it properly."

👍︎ 3
💬︎
👤︎ u/TommehBoi
📅︎ Oct 15 2018
🚨︎ report
I can produce a good one every now and then...

Watching the news with my two roommates. Story on about a woman allegedly offering sexual favors in exchange for food stamps.

Rommate 1: Seriously, selling yourself for food stamps?

Me: Produce-tituion

Roomie 2: facepalms

Roomie 1: Well she wont have to worry about getting any meats at least.

Roomie 2: Double facepalms

👍︎ 2
💬︎
📅︎ May 28 2015
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.