Why is it illegal to do reverse cowgirl in Alabama?

Because you don’t turn your back on family.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/robindc_93
πŸ“…︎ Dec 11 2020
🚨︎ report
In Illinois, it's illegal to have legal possesion over fecal matter of any sort.

Can't have shit in Detroit.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Meini_Studios
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2020
🚨︎ report
It should be illegal for London to go into lockdown over Christmas!

...That's capital punishment!

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/queenofthebans
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2020
🚨︎ report
I was going on an illegal half marathon yesterday and the cops caught me.

I decided to run

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dizzie222
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Did you hear the Trump administration is thinking about making it illegal to sell pre-shredded cheese?

Apparently they want to make America grate again.

πŸ‘︎ 366
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πŸ‘€︎ u/smakattak
πŸ“…︎ Jul 19 2020
🚨︎ report
What’s the difference between illegal and unlawful?

One’s against the law and the other is a sick bird.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ“…︎ Oct 27 2020
🚨︎ report
I went shopping at Coles to buy Mayonnaise, but they said it was illegal to buy without cabbage and carrots.

It’s Coleslaw

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ“…︎ Nov 13 2020
🚨︎ report
This is dope. (Yes, weed is illegal in India)
πŸ‘︎ 129
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πŸ‘€︎ u/golubeerji
πŸ“…︎ Jul 18 2020
🚨︎ report
"If organ trafficking is illegal...."

"Then what about pianos?" -my dad

πŸ‘︎ 377
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Alpha_greenwood
πŸ“…︎ Jun 15 2020
🚨︎ report
What drug is illegal under the sea?

Sea weed

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 03 2020
🚨︎ report
The school made the use of "bullet points" illegal because it incited violence in the classroom, and I must admit I couldn't have cared less. That's all changed now, though.

The bus driver isn't allowed to drive my kids anymore because we live on a dead end street.

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πŸ“…︎ Aug 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Where do mice get their illegal alcohol?

At the squeak-easy!

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/pawljames
πŸ“…︎ Jul 25 2020
🚨︎ report
You know those big round bales of hay? they are illegal in Wyoming...

Yeah, It turns out that the animals weren't getting a square meal.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/phlatbroke
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2020
🚨︎ report
Why was the Boston Tea Party illegal?

It was destruction of Private Proper Tea!

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/zigbigidorlu
πŸ“…︎ May 26 2020
🚨︎ report
There was a fire in the illegal weed farm which trapped some cows.

The steaks have never been higher.

πŸ‘︎ 13
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Team_Pineapple
πŸ“…︎ Mar 29 2020
🚨︎ report
Not many people know this, but Boy George had a taste for exotic and somewhat illegal Indian cuisine...

His favourite was the Korma Chameleon.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dongwaffler
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2020
🚨︎ report
What do you call illegal, fermented milk?

Mooshine.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ElsaFrozen2013
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Drawing on yourself should be illegal

The minute you do, you’re a marked man

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KIT-3
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2020
🚨︎ report
What drug is illegal in the ocean

Sea weed

πŸ‘︎ 129
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Luigigamer74002
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2019
🚨︎ report
If you’re thinking about doing something illegal oil yourself up first.

That way you’re a smooth criminal.

πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Bradb717
πŸ“…︎ Jan 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Why can't ants fund illegal activities ?

They have Anti Money Laundering

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dadjokeretailer
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27 2020
🚨︎ report
Watching out for illegal refills
πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/EpicPunz
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04 2020
🚨︎ report
What is the difference between illegal and unlawful?

One is against the law and the other is a sick bird.

πŸ‘︎ 150
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πŸ‘€︎ u/MarkTheBag112
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2019
🚨︎ report
If I could have any superpower, I would choose invisibility. But I wouldn't use it to do anything ILLEGAL...

Just to be clear.

πŸ‘︎ 50
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aphaelion
πŸ“…︎ Dec 04 2019
🚨︎ report
I once tried to drive my Toyota Corolla with a stick shift on the Autobahn, but German authorities flagged me down and informed me that was illegal...

So I drove down the manualbahn instead.

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CalmingVisionary
πŸ“…︎ Dec 27 2019
🚨︎ report
Whait that's illegal
πŸ‘︎ 48
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Shoplifting is illegal, but that's whisk I'm willing to take
πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Jvarblow
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2019
🚨︎ report
Do you know the difference between unlawful and illegal?

One is a crime and the other's a sick bird.

( Ν‘~ ΝœΚ– Ν‘Β°)

πŸ‘︎ 19
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Soylent_X
πŸ“…︎ Nov 10 2019
🚨︎ report
What do illegal immigrants hate about the winter?

ICE

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Longjumping_Pie
πŸ“…︎ Sep 04 2019
🚨︎ report
I used to make extra money by selling illegal tennis equipment on the side, but I was approached by some thugs who told me to stop.

I guess they control the Tennis Racket around here.

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 12 2019
🚨︎ report
I got injured in one of those illegal cockfighting pits.

Can you believe they let the other guy bring a bloody chicken!

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/phelyan
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2019
🚨︎ report
I tried to open a bar inside a cave but the police stopped me. They said it was illegal to sell alcohol to miners..
πŸ‘︎ 27
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CHEEZY_21
πŸ“…︎ Sep 27 2019
🚨︎ report
What's the difference between unlawful and illegal?

Unlawful is against the law. Illegal is just a sick bird.

πŸ‘︎ 3k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/TheStabbingHobo
πŸ“…︎ Aug 05 2017
🚨︎ report
Did you see they made round bails of hay illegal in Wisconsin? It’s because the cows weren’t getting a square meal.
πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ruchi565
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2019
🚨︎ report
If you were moving something illegal, and a cop caught you, but you started dancing....

Who 'bust a move'? You or the cop?

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/PacMook_Bro
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2019
🚨︎ report
So Donald Trump (or "the Don" as some call him) has realized that illegal immigrants must be deported at night so that no one will see them leaving and complain...

The problem, however, is that there isn't enough light for the immigrants to find their way back to Mexico. Because of this, the Don institutes his "Early Light" plan in order to give the immigrants a way to see. One immigrant, Jose, is partially blind, so they are wondering if the "Early Light" program will still allow him to see. The ask him: Jose can you see by the Don's "Early Light."

πŸ‘︎ 18
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πŸ‘€︎ u/JoahTheProtozoa
πŸ“…︎ Aug 08 2018
🚨︎ report
Watched a documentary on illegal drugs last night. Five Stars.

Most documentaries are more enjoyable that way.

πŸ‘︎ 959
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Mar 19 2018
🚨︎ report
I'm addicted to robbing chemistry stores. It is what I live for. I know that it's illegal, I know that it's dangerous. I've even nearly been killed a couple of times. But I don't care,

I'll diluting.

πŸ‘︎ 17
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πŸ‘€︎ u/analblades
πŸ“…︎ May 11 2019
🚨︎ report
Do you know why stealing is illegal?

Because they bandit

πŸ‘︎ 54
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dagusiu
πŸ“…︎ Jul 03 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you hear they made round hay bales illegal?

Cows weren't getting a square meal.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/aussietin
πŸ“…︎ Jun 13 2019
🚨︎ report
An alternate world where it's illegal to make or even touch puns. Punsmiths are protesting against this.

There's a pun crying to be made here, but I can't put my finger on it.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/buttsecks42069
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call an illegal ant?

A tor-ant.

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/StuxieDev
πŸ“…︎ Apr 25 2019
🚨︎ report
What is the difference between unlawful and illegal?

Unlawful is something against the law, illegal is a sick bird.

πŸ‘︎ 40
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ZannerTheBanner
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Did you see they made round bails of hay illegal in Wisconsin?

It’s because the cows weren’t getting a square meal.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/lobsterbash
πŸ“…︎ Feb 06 2019
🚨︎ report

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