Unlawful Puns

Yeah, it’s called a Sin-tax.

One’s against the law and the other is a sick bird.

One means it's against the law. The other is a sick bird.

-Told to me by my dad, about 40 years ago.

Don't know why I was carrying it around in the first place.

I was charged with unlawful possession of a firearm.

I'm surprised that Switzerland can get away with using people as currency. I'm even more surprised they can find so many people named Frank.

Backstory: I play in a small band that does a "tour" of southern Wisconsin every year. The bands name is the Petty Thieves. This is my first year with them, but every year they come up with a tour name and make nice t-shirts and material with the tour name on them. Last two tour names were "Sticky Fingers" and "Busted!" We are looking for something related to the band name. Something clever and crime related. If it has mild sexual innuendo, all the better, but not overtly obscene. Some tour names we came up with are: Five Finger Discount, Backdoor Tour, Snatching Kisses, Kissing Snatches, Robbing the Cradle, Something something Miss Demeanors, Spread 'em, Felonious Funk, Unlawful Entry, Rhymes against Humanity, etc...

If you have anything punny, please throw it out there. Top 3 upvoted names get reddit gold. If we use your tour name, I'l send you the tshirt. Thanks kind sirs!

They said it was unlawful use of a fire-arm.

While having a conversation with my wife's uncle about how it's illegal to round up the wild horses around my neighborhood, he came out with this joke:

Uncle: "Well do you know what the difference between unlawful and illegal is?"

Me: "What's that?"

Uncle: "Well unlawful is against the law, and illegal is a sick bird".

One is against the law and the other is a sick bird.

One is a crime and the other's a sick bird.

( ͡~ ͜ʖ ͡°)

Unlawful is against the law. Illegal is just a sick bird.

Unlawful is something against the law, illegal is a sick bird.

Unlawful is against the law and illegal is a sick bird.

Ones breaking the law and the others a sick bird.

One is against the law, and the other is a sick bird.

One gets you in trouble and the other is a sick bird.

Unlawful means "against the law" and illegal is a sick bird.

Unlawful means something is against the law, while illegal is a sick bird.

Unlawful is against the law and illegal is a sick bird!