When he found out I was sick, my friend messaged me, hoping that I will quickly find a deep hole in a ground full of water.
I'm happy he wished me to get well soon.
π︎ 5
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︎ Jan 04 2021
I was hoping some anti-lockdown subs would appear in Popular...
... but they've all been quarantined.
π︎ 6
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︎ Nov 24 2020
I submitted nearly a dozen entries to a dad joke competition, hoping one would win.
Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
π︎ 44
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︎ Aug 19 2020
I put original copies of "The Fall of the House of Usher", "The Murders in the Rue Morgue", "The Pit and the Pendulum" and "The Tell-Tale Heart" on credit hoping to pay them off slowly. Unfortunately, I couldn't make all payments...
π︎ 2
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︎ Oct 01 2020
I post a pun everyday on this subreddit hoping itβll blow but Iβm disappointed.. every time!
π︎ 10
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︎ May 21 2020
I entered 10 puns in a contest hoping one would win.
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︎ Apr 10 2020
Hoping this pun grows on people..
π︎ 4k
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︎ Feb 04 2019
So I gave my friend 10 puns hoping that one of them would make him laugh.
Sadly, no pun in ten did.
π︎ 15
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︎ May 07 2020
Someone kidnapped the Easter Bunny, hoping to steal his stash of candy. But the Bunny was steadfast and wouldn't talk.
Couldn't get a Peep out of him.
π︎ 5
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︎ Mar 20 2020
So i posted this OC in r/jokes a while ago and it only got 2 upvotes. Hoping you intellectuals will appreciate it more ....... Why do environmentalists iron their clothes?
To decrease the materials being used.
π︎ 6
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︎ Jul 23 2019
Iβm hoping L is J/K.
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︎ Jul 30 2018
Hoping it was whale worth posting this.
π︎ 89
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︎ Jan 30 2019
Iβm hoping in the next iOS update Apple releases they include more jack o lantern emojis.
But I donβt want to count my pumpkins before they patch.
π︎ 7
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︎ Oct 30 2019
Hoping to collect on insurance, I bought a bumper sticker for my old car saying, "Please Steal Me." Unfortunately it didn't work.
They stole the sticker and left the car.
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︎ Oct 20 2019
Everyone keeps talking about some dude named Les who is really sad and Iβm hoping to meet him soon and cheer him up.
Then he will be.......Les Miserable.
π︎ 6
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︎ Jul 07 2019
Going out on a limb here, hoping this wood help with rekindling our relationship.
π︎ 12
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︎ Mar 16 2019
I've been searching for a job, hoping maybe there'll be a bakery hiring
I'll knead a little bit of dough to get by.
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︎ May 10 2019
I was hoping my friend would catch the lemon-lime soda i tossed her.
But unfortunately Sierra Mist
π︎ 18
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︎ May 29 2019
I went on Deal or No Deal hoping to win a million dollars.
But that turned out to be not the case.
π︎ 3
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︎ Aug 02 2019
The nurse called me and said, βUnder βmedical historyβ, we were hoping for something specific to you...β
You wrote down βFleming discovered penicillin in 1928.β
π︎ 19
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︎ Mar 14 2019
I posted this hoping to get some upvotes...
π︎ 14
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︎ Jul 07 2018
I was hoping to buy a new car but I was after decent onboard storage so after the salesman specified lots of features about it, I asked "Cargo space?"
He replied "Car no do that, car no fly"
π︎ 12
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︎ Mar 26 2018
Looking for shark puns! Hoping I could get some help here.
π︎ 17
π
︎ Jan 09 2015
I am really hoping Justin Beiber sings at my funeral.
Then itβll be the second worst thing happening to my friends that day.
π︎ 10
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︎ Aug 22 2018
I recently started a new cheese diet. Iβm hoping to cheddar few pounds
π︎ 10
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︎ Aug 04 2018
Really hoping this new app is worth it's weight in gold.
π︎ 7
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︎ Apr 08 2016
I showed my dad the 'Suicide Squad' trailer, hoping he would come to see it with me.
He said, "it wouldn't last very long..."
π︎ 31
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︎ Jul 28 2015
I'm stuck in a migraine clinic hoping to get some relief. IVan is my new buddy
imgur.com/yM0ejnb
π︎ 34
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︎ Nov 15 2013
My wife saw that the mail had already arrived and said "darn, I was hoping to catch the mailman"
So I said "maybe you're using the wrong bait"
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︎ Dec 17 2015
This one came to me, now I'm hoping my girlfriend doesn't have something to tell me.
I was out walking the dog today when I passed by a young woman.
"Cute dog," she said. "Is he purebred?"
"No, I'm pretty sure he's pure dog"
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︎ May 08 2014
[REQUEST] I was hoping to see if it was possible for people to just a picture of their dad's reaction.
I feel like half the fun of a dad joke is always your father's reaction. You know that stupid grin or him slamming on the steering wheel. I mean I was wondering if it was possible for people to try to get a snap shot of their father in action. I know dad jokes is text only but I thought it would make the joke more funny with a quality visual.
π︎ 2
π
︎ Jan 03 2014
A man entered a pun contest and said ten pins, hoping one would win...
Unfortunately no pun intended
π︎ 5
π
︎ Jun 17 2020
I submitted ten puns to a pun contest hoping that one would win,
π︎ 5
π
︎ Nov 11 2019
I entered 10 puns into a pun contest hoping at least one would win.
π︎ 139
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︎ Sep 08 2018
There was a pun contest in my town, so I entered ten submissions under different names, hoping one of my puns would win
π︎ 2
π
︎ Aug 01 2019
I entered 10 puns into a contest, hoping that one would win
π︎ 5
π
︎ May 01 2019
So I told my friend 10 puns, hoping that one of them would make him laugh.
Sadly, no pun in ten did.
π︎ 239
π
︎ Jun 18 2017
So a guy gave one of his friends ten puns hoping that one of them would make him laugh...
Sadly, no pun in ten did.
π︎ 9
π
︎ Jan 12 2019
I submitted ten puns into a contest hoping one would win
π︎ 36
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︎ Aug 20 2014
I submitted 10 puns to a newspaper contest hoping they would be featured. Unfortunately no pun in ten did.
π︎ 29
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︎ Mar 06 2014
I submitted 10 wordplays to a pun contest hoping one would win best quip...
π︎ 5
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︎ Mar 26 2016
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