I told almost a dozen dad jokes yesterday, and I hoped at least one would get a laugh.
So for the past several days, I've been sending my friend a dad joke per day. I hoped at least one would make him laugh.
Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
(And yes, I really did, just to make this joke to him. The resulting groan was worth the ten-day setup :p)
I went fishing. I was out of worms, but was saving a can of alphabet soup for lunch, so I put some letters on the line and hoped for the best. Moments later, I caught a whopper, and boy, he started talking! The fish said:
"Hooked on phonics worked for me!"
A vendor at the fair told me that he hoped that the rain kept up.
Just so that it wouldn't come down.
Heard that from a deadhead at the Deerfield fair.
Just dad joked another coworker; was as epic as I hoped
A coworker was looking through our tea selection at work and said "I could really go for some sleepy time tea right now, too bad we don't have any at the office."
To which, I replied, "Why would our office stock sleepy time tea? We might as well just have unproductivi-tea."
He just shook his head in disapproval.
Need Hope puns!
So I have this friend who I call Hope (which she finds annoying btw) so I want to tell her hope puns to annoy her. Please help, you're my only hope
my friend just told me, 'I hope you die in a deep hole filled with water'.
What's a doctor hope to gain from a urine test?
Hope that job doesn’t suck
Hope you have a good one!
Hope you are WW2 aviation fans...
Hope a large fraction of y'all have a sense of humour
I apologise if this isn't allowed.
New to this subreddit. I know the point of this thing is to share funny jokes, but since I'm a newbie I hope you'll allow me this one opportunity to make a serious but friendly PSA: If you're lucky enough to have a father, don't take him for granted. Even when they scold or punish you, trust their judgement, it's likely for good reason even if you can't see it at the time. When I was a child I narrowly avoided a horrific accident in which 4 of my friends were electrocuted at a playground we used to play on every day after school. I used to hate my old man for being so strict and disciplining me when all of my friends got to run wild, but if it weren't for him I definitely would have been electrocuted too that day. But I wasn't. I was grounded.
I was hoping some anti-lockdown subs would appear in Popular...
... but they've all been quarantined.
I hope you haven't seen this before, but it needs to be reposted.
I hope this is (Swiss) cheesy enough for my first post
Imagine being held at gunpoint by (bear with me) a literate animal, and the only hope of rescue is (BEAR WITH ME) posting a coded message on social media.
wHo the hEll would beLieve such a thing can hapPen.
Made this one up myself. Hope you like! Did you know there is a Mr Potatohead knock off?
I hope you all enjoy this terrible joke I made
I hope when they're older all the coronials
Will refer to themselves as quaran-teens
I hope not to let everyone down
True story. Wife was cooking dinner and says you know what's odd?
With out hesitation I say: the number 7?
Never did find out what else was odd
There was the person who sent ten puns to friends, with the hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh.
A piece I just finished working on, hope you all like it :)
I hope he said Tank you later xD
What-a-rack! Made these for my boyfriend's birthday. Hope you guys like them.
Just thought of this, Hope it is worthy of this sub... What do you call a walking talking pear tree?
I took the shell off of my racing snail in hopes that he'd be lighter and faster...
But now he's just sluggish
hopefully this wasnt posted here yet; found this on r/memes
This isn’t mine and I don’t know who made it, but it’s been on my phone for so many years and I haven’t seen it on here yet. I hope you all love it as much as I do.
Hope this one doesn’t blow up on me.
The Egyptian government has asked Cairo’s taxi drivers to drive around and sound their horns in the hope that familiar sounds will help calm the residents following the pandemic.
Operation Toot And Calm ‘Em will last a week.
The chemistry teacher broke her leg.
Turned out it was a compound fracture.
I put original copies of "The Fall of the House of Usher", "The Murders in the Rue Morgue", "The Pit and the Pendulum" and "The Tell-Tale Heart" on credit hoping to pay them off slowly. Unfortunately, I couldn't make all payments...
I submitted nearly a dozen entries to a dad joke competition, hoping one would win.
Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.
I hope I never lose my hearing.
It would be ear replaceable.
This is my first comic so I hope it doesn't get ghosted
I hope Elon Musk never gets caught up in a major scandal
I just imagine Elon-Gate would be really drawn out....
Man, 2020 is rough. But I have a little bit of hope for you.
I really hope I don't get addicted to German sausage again
Those days were the Wurst.
Hope this clasifies as a pun.
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