Someone offered me a nice cup of green tea

So naturally I said yes, matcha-bliged

πŸ‘︎ 14
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bigolbrian
πŸ“…︎ Nov 05 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the Marxist only drink green tea?

Because all proper tea is theft!

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/adidassamba
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Have you heard about the new subscription service, that Gary Lineker has launched? 28 portions of green tea delivered monthly.

It’s called Matcha the Day

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hairyfacedhooman
πŸ“…︎ Jul 31 2019
🚨︎ report
My wife spilled some green tea on her shirt yesterday.

I told her don't be upset now you have a green tea shirt.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jan 06 2019
🚨︎ report
Waking up after a night of drinking my girlfriend asked me to bring her some green tea to aid her hangover

I came back with this http://imgur.com/9KgUeRK

Dad jokes are the best medicine

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/deutschbag17
πŸ“…︎ May 25 2015
🚨︎ report
I was trying to make green tea and called my dad to ask where the honey was.

She's at work!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheRealCC3
πŸ“…︎ Apr 26 2015
🚨︎ report
So my dad took my sister and I through a coffee shop drive through...

Dad: we'll get a black coffee, a hot chocolate, and a green tea. Drive through attendant: would you like anything in the green tea? Dad: no, just green.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/jayasunshine
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2018
🚨︎ report
Not a dad, but caught my mom out with this once.

My mom was making a cup of tea and since I was getting something out of the fridge, asked me if I could pass her the "green" milk, wanting the skimmed milk that comes in cartons with green coloured caps.

Me: "No, we've only got the white stuff".

Made my dad proud.

πŸ‘︎ 107
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mister_Biscuit
πŸ“…︎ May 17 2016
🚨︎ report
Fried Ice Cream

Sister in law was watching my kids and my wife and I went out for dinner. Sent her a picture of my wife's dessert and the following conversation happened.

Me: Mmmmmmmmm Fried Ice Cream

S-I-L: Ugh haven't had that in forever!

Me: It's green tea ice cream. How long has that been?

SIL: Never tried green tea ice cream. But I love fried ice cream. Well, I use to anyway haha. Nothing tastes the same since I had kids.

Me: Yeah, that's why I never ate my kids. Leaves a foul taste in your mouth forever.

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/YoPhilly
πŸ“…︎ Mar 27 2016
🚨︎ report
Tim Hortons employees are probably tired of this dad joke

> Dad: Can I get a large green tea, nothing in it? > > Cashier: You want one large green tea, black? > > Dad: No, I want it green! > > Cashier: [...]

Of course then he starts laughing his ass off, while she forces a smile and quickly tries to get away.

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MattJokir
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2014
🚨︎ report
My English teacher asked me what I think about loyalty...

I said I prefer Green tea!

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sexy_Krampus
πŸ“…︎ Mar 18 2016
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.