Graduate Student Puns

A Semi-Professor

Doctor

Doctor

So, I'm a Spanish professor, and I gave a final exam this morning. One of the last parts was that students had to write a paragraph using reflexive verbs in which they describe their daily routine. Since the class only had nine students in it, I told them that if they wanted to wait, I would grade their exams for them and tell them their class grade.

It was an open-book final exam (11 pages long), so I was in my office, and a graduating senior finished first and gave me her exam. When I got to her paragraph, I saw that she had written in Spanish that every day she woke up, got up, took a shower, got dressed, brushed her teeth, ate breakfast, and then she and her friend Emmy went horseback riding. Now, I knew that she didn't go horseback riding, ever, but that it was vocabulary from the previous chapter. The following conversation ensued:

Me: Horseback riding? Really?
Her: Yep!
Me: Every day?
Her: Yep!
Me: Every single day?
Her: Sí, Señor.
Me: I guess you could call it a stable routine then.

My seminar professor emails us, "No BioPsych today guys. We are interviewing 2017 people."

(she's referring to students in Sophomore graduating year who are applying for this concentration)

I respond in my email, "Wow 2017 people! That's practically the size of the entire student body! Good luck!" (we have a small campus)

Can I be a dad yet?

My fiancée is a graduate student. The cat likes to whine until she's picked up. As my fiancée was studying, the cat jumped up onto her desk.

Her (to the cat): "If you come over here, you're going to get held."

Me: "No, you're playing into her hand!"

Her: "She doesn't have any hands."

I must say, I'm a bit proud.