Diploma Puns

A list of puns related to "Diploma"

I was gonna make a joke about diplomas

But i was like nah you wouldnt get it.

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👤︎ u/kingxjulian0
📅︎ Nov 18 2020
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CANNIBAL: “Hey, how did I get this cap, gown, and diploma?”

ME: “it must have been the grad-U-ate”

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👤︎ u/BlackSaliva
📅︎ Dec 06 2018
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For the final piece of coursework in my art diploma, I used my knife to cut a line across Mr Hamill and Mr Wahlberg just after they'd finished eating.

I scored full Marks.

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👤︎ u/QuasarSandwich
📅︎ Sep 28 2018
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Dad joked my dad when my diploma came in the mail today.

Dad: I'm glad you got your diploma, it will really open doors for you out in the real world. Me: How can it when it doesn't have any arms? He wasn't as amused as I thought he would be.

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👤︎ u/akumite
📅︎ Jun 04 2014
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2/3 is a passing grade

but when I lose one of my three kids, everyone freaks out like I did something horrible. 😒

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👤︎ u/OratioFidelis
📅︎ Jun 25 2018
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I finally got my P.H.D.!

Public High-school Diploma

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👤︎ u/Wildefriend1
📅︎ Apr 23 2018
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When talking to my girlfriend about wedding dates

Me: "Let's do it on the 12th, I want to be able to say, 'I got my diploma one week, and my wife the next.'"

Her: "I don't want to have the two events so close together, you can just say 'two weeks later.'"

Me: "It just doesn't have the same ring to it, but I guess it's still the same ring to you."

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👤︎ u/jeremiah1119
📅︎ Sep 13 2016
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On the first day of highschool...

A father looked at his son and said, "I don't want this to be all about a diploma. I want you to think bigger. Try shooting for a B-ploma or even an A-ploma.

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👤︎ u/nickfehlinger
📅︎ Mar 28 2017
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