It's pretty obvious, that if you run in front of a moving car, you will get tired. But if you run behind it..
..do you just get exhausted ?
Context for non-Indians - Her name is Shilpa. Get it?
I was going to the moon on vacation and I read it gets to -280 degrees at night,
I might need a space heater.
My friend gets in debt and offers to work it off by redoing peoples' kitchens
but I wouldn't accept his counter offer.
I was prescribed medication but I couldn't take it. It was too hard to get the lid off. You might have heard of it...
Get it?
https://preview.redd.it/k4xmc8tix7071.png?width=500&format=png&auto=webp&s=3c1e08aceced35b8e427ebfcba6453786654da57
What's it called when an IT person gets surgery on their fingers?
What’s it called when all the smart people get vaccinated?
How did Canada get its name?
They figured out the fairest way to name their country was to pull letters out of a hat. So they gathered around and a guy started pulling letters...
pulls letter "C, eh."
pulls another "N, eh."
pulls another "D, eh."
And that's how Canada got its name.
When I get sad, I like to get on an elevator. I find it very uplifting.
They say people get a little crazy when it is a full moon,
But when it’s crescent... it’s true lunar C.
If you get an email about spiced meat, don't open it.
Get it? Because it's in Erie, PA
This post might be a little ballsy. And if it gets a lot of attention, I might get cocky.
I admit it’s a repost, but this pun is just a sin... Please let me know if you get it!!!
I stood in the park wondering why a frisbee gets larger when it gets closer
Petco has a new Covid vaccine for animals & humans. In tests, some people have reported excessive hair growth on their hands. I'm going to get it anyway...
but it does give me paws.
What does a beam of light wear when it wants to get kinky?
I read that in medieval times, if you lost your castle to invaders during a siege, it was incredibly unlikely that you’d get the well-fortified tower area back.
Guys back then were playing for keeps.
I was positive she would get it...
If you get and email titled knock knock don’t open it
It’s a Jehovah’s Witness working from home
Don't you hate it when a cranberries song gets stuck in your head
In your head in your heeeaaad
What does the egg say when it gets turnt up?
Gravity is one of the most fundamental forces in the universe. What do you get when you remove it?
How long does it take to get the Belgium waffle all the way from Belgium?
I overheard an older gentleman asking the waitress this before ordering at the diner.
I don't get how it's possible to reduce the social distancing requirement from six feet to three feet.
In almost all cases its impossible to have three feet between 2 people.
How many boats are trying to get through the Suez Canal now that it's unblocked?
I don't get why they call it a Samsung Galaxy.
My buddy keeps asking me to blow cool air on him when he gets hot, and I don’t like it.
Heres a bacteria joke. If you dont get it just google it.
I've been wearing this mask for so long, I wasn't sure I'd even be able to get rid of it.
I went into the kitchen this morning and there was a "Get better soon" card on the table for me. I called out to my wife asking what it was for because I wasn't sick.
She shouted back from the other room "It's an ultimatum."
I had a sheer hope that they’ll get it
Bad as it gets
I was setting up my buddy Rick with this cute gal Tina I knew from work. She was smart, funny and worked in a shop.
Several years ago, she lost all the digits on both feet in a shop accident.
When I told Rick this he did a hard pass on her.
Turns out he is LackToes Intolerant.
If your girlfriend/wife ever gets you a gladiator uniform, it's a pretty good sign.
She wants you to be more Roman-tic.
An old guy goes to the chemist and asks the pharmacist, "Is there some pills that can help with sex?" The pharmacist says, "Yes, Viagra, it's awesome, I take it myself" The old guy asks, "Can you get it over the counter?" Pharmacist replies, "If I took 2 or 3, probably."
What is it called when you get a discount on explosives?
Why can’t the crocodile get it up?
He has ereptile dysfunction and lives in Lake Flaccid
I waited all afternoon to get my Covid vaccine in our small remote village, by the time it was my turn, they were administering them by candlelight...
I’m really not sure how effective they are, seems as if they are a shot in the dark.
Get it? Because...elevators..
So last night my boyfriend left the bedroom door open to get more heat in the room because there are more heating vents in the hallway than in the bedroom. I said, "You might say it's eVENTful." He didn't laugh. So then I said, "You'll laugh eVENTually."
Pirate gets his ears pierced. How much did it cost.
Where does the army get it's higher up officers?
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