Are German puns allowed??
πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/neur0nic
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 07 2019
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German pun
πŸ‘οΈŽ 36
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Shipless_Captain
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 20 2018
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An American, a Frenchman, a Spaniard and a German where all attending a Zoom meeting. The Supervisor asked β€œcan you see me ok?”

To which they answered β€œyes” β€œoui” β€œsi” β€œja”.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 1k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Raised_via_chancla
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 09 2021
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German Wifi
πŸ‘οΈŽ 119
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/frazyn
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 04 2021
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A German women was arrested for faking her taxes

They were FRAUdulent.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/katsulambert
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 30 2021
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A waiter at a german restaurant warned me that the meat they used for sausages was suspicious. I replied: " It's okay...

... I've had wurst."

πŸ‘οΈŽ 28
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/FreeksTheFly
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 19 2021
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Did you hear about the new Chinese-German fusion restaurant?

The food is great but an hour later you're hungry for power.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 4
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/brahkce
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 03 2021
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What did the protestor yell in the German bakery?

This is stollen land!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Coupevillian
πŸ“…οΈŽ May 01 2021
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What do German cannibals eat at parties?

Frankfurt-ers and Hamburg-ers.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Ivegot_back
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 24 2021
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A German spy gave themself away when I sneezed. They said, "gesundheit!"

It was a blessing in disguise.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 42
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kevographic
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 11 2021
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What kind of a belly button does a German car mechanic have?

An Audi

πŸ‘οΈŽ 7
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kickypie
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 23 2021
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How do you greet a German Car salesman?

Audi you do

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/glezgatoon
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 13 2021
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What do Germans call the first day of wheat harvest, and also a popular children's game where kids chase each other around a wheat field?

Gluten Tag

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/HennyPennyBenny
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 22 2021
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I interviewed the leading German herb gardeners and compiled their knowledge into a book.

It's called "Wisdom of the Kraut"

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Hasanowitsch
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 17 2021
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Your weather may be wet, but German weather is wetter.
πŸ‘οΈŽ 16
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Dutch_Midget
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 17 2021
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A German guy built a bathroom around his table

Bad um Tisch

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Dutch_Midget
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 22 2021
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Why was the German Blitzkrieg in WW2 so effective?

Because their enemies did NAZI it coming

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/this_my_lurk_account
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 13 2021
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I just read an article about a German stealth division from WWII that never had a single casualty

Guess it’s true what they say, you can not hit what you can Nazi

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/turkyman3
πŸ“…οΈŽ Apr 04 2021
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Oh NO!!! Just found out I failed my German exam...

Sacre Bleu.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 25 2021
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Just found out I’m part German.

They said it was nein%

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/DustyBunny42
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 30 2021
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Don't you hate when the deli is out of lunch meats and you must settle for German sausage?

That is, the wurst.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 23
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 17 2021
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What do you called a german made quadrilateral?

A reichtangle

πŸ‘οΈŽ 12
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Major_Cupcake
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 08 2021
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Why did the German army not get presents from Santa during WWII?

Because they were naught-zis (Nazis).

(My 6 year old came up with this joke on his own out of the blue.)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/talin342
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 01 2021
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A German boy pushes his brother off a cliff.

β€œLook mom, no Hans!”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 361
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/cyclopropagative
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 10 2021
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Today marks the 77th anniversary that my grandfather was responsible for bringing down 4 German bombers in one day during the war

He was the worst mechanic the luftwaffe ever had

πŸ‘οΈŽ 26
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/2canVANdam
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 02 2021
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Did you hear that Elon Musk is trying to add Anti-German features to the new Tesla?

He is trying to add Hans free steering.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 21
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Chewbacca_The_Wookie
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 10 2021
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I asked my German friend if he starts work at 8am.

He said β€œNein!”

πŸ‘οΈŽ 18
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/randomfluffyfluff
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 09 2021
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I often worry about German sausages

Basically I fear the wurst.

Edit: thanks for my first award ya loonies ;)

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Kimenon001
πŸ“…οΈŽ Aug 23 2020
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I'm gonna start a German themed donut shop.

Any investors interested in backing Gluten Morgen?

Pretty proud of that one.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 15
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/samjtrost
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 25 2021
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Why was the German pilot so tired?

He was part of the Schluftwaffe

πŸ‘οΈŽ 2
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/notwutiwantd
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 21 2021
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What did the German bread say at breakfast?

Gluten morgen!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 22
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/karl_oskar
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 19 2021
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do you know why German communist ate kids?

because they were kinder

πŸ‘οΈŽ 5
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/chewby_chan
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 19 2021
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My German Shepherd asked me for a snack

At least, I think that's what it was. I don't speak a word of German.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 19
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/kdlaz
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 08 2021
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How does two German car enthusiast cowboys greet each other?

Audi, partner 🀠

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11k
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/EL17Eness
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jul 12 2020
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What do two German bakers say when the see each other?

Gluten tag!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 37
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/tar0nek0
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 13 2021
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What did the German soldier say to the French soldier at the end of WWI?

Verdun.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 11
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VaiterZen
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 25 2021
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Why was the German 7 so hungry?

Because 7 8 nein.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/bambamtx
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 12 2021
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What is the name of the funky German Bakery?

Roggen Roll

πŸ‘οΈŽ 6
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Johnny_Creditcard
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 18 2021
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How many germs are there in Germany ?

Many.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 512
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/meme_stealing_bandit
πŸ“…οΈŽ Mar 29 2021
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Choking on German sausage

Has to be one of the wurst ways to die.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 8
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/ThaDe_TherO
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 10 2021
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Just deleted all the German contacts off my phone.

...it’s now Hans free.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 13
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/sminky99
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 15 2021
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My German friend is pretty big

You could say he stahl

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/Ja-das-ist-gut
πŸ“…οΈŽ Feb 12 2021
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99% of German Shepherds...

...are dogs.

πŸ‘οΈŽ 17
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/VERBERD
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 27 2021
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How do German bakers say β€œgood bye”?

Gluten tag!

πŸ‘οΈŽ 3
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πŸ‘€οΈŽ u/PLUMBUM2
πŸ“…οΈŽ Jan 18 2021
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