What happens when a frog parks illegally?

They get toad.

πŸ‘︎ 130
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sur5er
πŸ“…︎ Jun 01
🚨︎ report
What type of shoes does a frog wear?

Open toad

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Heartstop56
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11
🚨︎ report
How does a Japanese frog say thanks?

Arigatoad

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ofek_dab
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04
🚨︎ report
How do depressed frogs die?

They Kermit suicide.

πŸ‘︎ 37
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ May 06
🚨︎ report
A frog decided to do a genealogy test

Turns out he’s a tad polish

πŸ‘︎ 25
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ohDaddyNo
πŸ“…︎ Jun 04
🚨︎ report
What happened to the frog that hurt his leg?

He was un-hoppy!

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/PrincessCuteButt
πŸ“…︎ May 12
🚨︎ report
I just finished a documentary about frogs

It was absolutely ribbiting

πŸ‘︎ 48
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/-bonas-
πŸ“…︎ May 08
🚨︎ report
Why did the frog take the bus to work today ?

His car got toad away

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/HellsJuggernaut
πŸ“…︎ Jun 10
🚨︎ report
What do you call an illegally parked frog?

Toad

πŸ‘︎ 35
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/dhisum_dhisum
πŸ“…︎ May 03
🚨︎ report
What drink does a frog order at the bar?

A mo-squito...

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/discostuu72
πŸ“…︎ May 17
🚨︎ report
I told this joke to a frog

It quacked him up

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/midy-dk
πŸ“…︎ May 05
🚨︎ report
Frog ponds 🐸

Q: How deep is a frog pond?

A: Knee-deep! Knee-deep!

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/svn380
πŸ“…︎ May 17
🚨︎ report
A frog walks into a bank for a loan.

All he has for collateral is a ceramic statue. The loan officer, Patty Black, is unsure of what to do so she consults with her supervisor; "Oh fine", he says. "It's a knick knack Patty Black, give the frog a loan."

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Remo1975
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09
🚨︎ report
What does a frog do to insult another frog?

Rib it

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 13
🚨︎ report
What kind of condoms do frogs prefer?

Ribb-ed

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/rdegannes87
πŸ“…︎ Apr 23
🚨︎ report
What’s a frogs favourite social site?
πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Dwez369
πŸ“…︎ Apr 09
🚨︎ report
What do Frogs say at a funeral?

Rippit

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Gulpped
πŸ“…︎ Apr 27
🚨︎ report
What did the frog say to the fish

Water you breathing

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/xace49
πŸ“…︎ Apr 14
🚨︎ report
What did a frog say to another frog after it told a joke

That really croaked me up!

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/GordonK928
πŸ“…︎ Apr 11
🚨︎ report
A tadpole turned into a frog.

"Watch where you're going," said the frog.

πŸ‘︎ 27
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TommehBoi
πŸ“…︎ Mar 01
🚨︎ report
What did the frog do when he contracted coronavirus?

He croaked.

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tradyk
πŸ“…︎ Apr 07
🚨︎ report
What happens when frogs park illegally

They get toad

πŸ‘︎ 45
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/froiman23
πŸ“…︎ Feb 27
🚨︎ report
What happened to the frog when it parked in the wrong place?

It got toad

πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/royaj77
πŸ“…︎ Feb 08
🚨︎ report
What happens when a frog's car breaks down?

IT GETS TOAD!

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/kickypie
πŸ“…︎ Mar 17
🚨︎ report
What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common?

Their middle name

πŸ‘︎ 68
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/pengoobanana
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22
🚨︎ report
What sound does a robotic frog make?

>!Ribbot Ribbot!<

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Foxblow
πŸ“…︎ Feb 22
🚨︎ report
"Why are frogs so happy?"

"They just eat what bugs them."

πŸ‘︎ 39
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RayInRed
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17
🚨︎ report
To reddit, I leave my only Mentos candy with a frog on it.

My last Memento

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/NotSoButtHurt
πŸ“…︎ Mar 02
🚨︎ report
I remember the first time I saw Kermit the Frog on Broadway...

Such a ribbit-ing performance.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/chuckyocouch_
πŸ“…︎ Mar 03
🚨︎ report
What do you call it when a Goodyear tire turns into a frog?

Leap year

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/RayInRed
πŸ“…︎ Feb 24
🚨︎ report
Did you hear about the young frog whose grandmother was from Warsaw?

He was a tad Pole.

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Jan 21
🚨︎ report
How do you know that frogs are skateboarding enthusiasts?

They’re always saying β€œrip it” β€œrip it” β€œrip it”

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/SnuggleMuggle98
πŸ“…︎ Jan 31
🚨︎ report
My friend told me this: What did the pet frog say after you received an F on your test paper?

Rippit

πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TimStaotic
πŸ“…︎ Jan 13
🚨︎ report
Why do frogs hate leap years

Cause they have to jump for so long

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Vico__Staps
πŸ“…︎ Jan 17
🚨︎ report
Why couldn’t the frog get to work

becuase his car got toad

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CurrentlyOnJah
πŸ“…︎ Dec 31 2019
🚨︎ report
One day, Kermit the Frog was a little short on cash, so he went to the bank to speak to a loan officer...

When he got there, a woman extended her hand.

"Good afternoon, sir," she said. "My name is Patricia Wack. How may I help you today?"

Kermit replied, "Hi-ho, Patricia! I'm Kermit the Frog, and I would like to borrow some money."

They walked over to her desk and sat down.

"Certainly, Mr. Frog--"

"Oh, just call me Kermit."

"Okay... Kermit. How much money would you like to borrow?"

"Ten thousand dollars."

Mildly surprised, Ms. Wack looked intently at Kermit.

"Do you have any references?"

"Well, I suppose I could use my father, Keith Richards."

Ms. Wack froze for a second, then...

"THE Keith Richards?"

"Oh, yes. In fact, he told me he's friends with your manager, which is why I came in here."

"Okay... Do you have any collateral?"

"Excuse me?"

"Collateral. Something of value, like a car, or a boat..."

"Oh, yes! I do have something. I have this."

Kermit reached into his briefcase and placed a small figurine on the desk. Patricia looked curiously at the object, then at our am

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 73
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/norrisrw
πŸ“…︎ Sep 07 2019
🚨︎ report
What happens when a frog’s car breaks down?

It gets toad away

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CixelsydDb4d
πŸ“…︎ Jan 11
🚨︎ report
What’s a frog’s favorite soda?

Croaka-cola

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JuBjUb1121
πŸ“…︎ Dec 20 2019
🚨︎ report
My daughter, 8, asked me what happens to frogs who illegally park their cars.

"I don't know," I said.

With a gleam in her eye, she squealed "They get toad!!"

Dad win there.

πŸ‘︎ 12k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/eagle_shadow
πŸ“…︎ Oct 23 2018
🚨︎ report
What do Kermit the Frog, John the Baptist and Vlad the Impaler have in common?

Same Middle Name

πŸ‘︎ 261
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Kerlandays
πŸ“…︎ Jul 30 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the frog carrying a hot pot say?

Trivet trivet.

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/wannabereaper
πŸ“…︎ Dec 01 2019
🚨︎ report
I watched a documentary about the noises frogs make

It was ribbiting.

πŸ‘︎ 36
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bermobaron
πŸ“…︎ Nov 21 2019
🚨︎ report
What does an antisocial frog say?

Reddit, Reddit.

πŸ‘︎ 68
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/OddSquirrel3
πŸ“…︎ Oct 03 2019
🚨︎ report
What's a frogs favorite drug?

Croakaine. I'll see myself out the door now.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/landoon_schelker
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2019
🚨︎ report
So a rabbi, a priest, and Kermit the frog all walk into a bar

The bartender looks at them and says, β€œwhat is this a joke?”

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/realswagmb
πŸ“…︎ Dec 14 2019
🚨︎ report
What kind of shoes does a frog wear?

Open toad!

πŸ‘︎ 24
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/CockBlockingTurd
πŸ“…︎ Sep 28 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the frog cross the road

Because the chicken was on vacation

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Nov 23 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you get when you feed a frog a mushroom?

Toadstool

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Science_Geek_101
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Why are frogs so happy?

Because they eat everything that bugs them.

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mr_steal_yo_birb
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2019
🚨︎ report
What is kermit the Frog's excuse for not recycling?

"It's not easy being green"

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/hoochthemoon
πŸ“…︎ Nov 27 2019
🚨︎ report
What's the frog's job at the hotel?

Bellhop

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lacsantos91
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2019
🚨︎ report
There is a clear difference between a poison dart frog and a bullfrog.

As if it wasn't obvious enough...

They're two toad-ally different things!

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ecquid-indignius
πŸ“…︎ Nov 22 2019
🚨︎ report
Frog parking at the local fairy garden
πŸ‘︎ 13
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LQuacks
πŸ“…︎ Sep 11 2019
🚨︎ report
What kind of shoes do frogs wear?

Open β€œtoad”

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheYonko27
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2019
🚨︎ report
One time I noticed a lizard stealing a meal from a very hungry frog

And I thought to myself, "What a cold blooded thing to do!"

πŸ‘︎ 9
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/alexd281
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2019
🚨︎ report
Why Did the Frog Cross the Road?

To show his friends he had guts.

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/scottBIGG
πŸ“…︎ Oct 29 2019
🚨︎ report
What’s an alcoholic frog’s favorite game?

Hopscotch

πŸ‘︎ 54
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/FinalCaveat
πŸ“…︎ Aug 24 2019
🚨︎ report
What the frog is this
πŸ‘︎ 49
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/boon_ashish
πŸ“…︎ May 31 2019
🚨︎ report
What holds a frog together?

Rivets...Rivets

πŸ‘︎ 12
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TDoubs
πŸ“…︎ Oct 13 2019
🚨︎ report
What happened to the frogs car when it broke down?

It got toad away.

πŸ‘︎ 55
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Shoopdebop
πŸ“…︎ Jul 14 2019
🚨︎ report
A condom manufacturer kept getting criticized because its new gimmicks never did anything for women. So they did what any good company would do and went to the most knowledgeable frog in the world for advice. You know what the frog said?

β€œRibbit.”

πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Smacksmackums
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2019
🚨︎ report
My 12-year-old son said, β€œWhen I was in Africa, I didn’t cut my food well enough. I got a frog in my throat.”

I added, β€œ...So you went to a witch doctor and ever since you’ve been a little horse.”

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/freshstart321
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2019
🚨︎ report
the land of frogs
πŸ‘︎ 18
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/EvilMurloc22
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2019
🚨︎ report
How do you tell the difference between a frog and a horny toad? A frog says, "Ribbit, ribbit" and a horny toad says, "Rub it, rub it.”
πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/ruchi565
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2019
🚨︎ report
How does a Bull Frog say farewell?

Ribbeye

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/MDCM
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2019
🚨︎ report
A frog walked into a bank...

... and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patty Whack.

"Miss Whack, I'd like to get a $30,000 loan to take a holiday."

Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it's okay, he knows the bank manager.

Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.

The frog says, "Sure. I have this," and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about an inch tall, bright pink and perfectly formed.

Very confused, Patty explains that she'll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office.

She finds the manager and says, "There's a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $30,000, and he wants to use this as collateral." She holds up the tiny pink elephant. "I mean, what in the world is this?"

The bank manager looks back at her and says, "It's a knickknack, Patty Whack. Give the frog a loan. His o

... keep reading on reddit ➑

πŸ‘︎ 23
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/mellon_coliee
πŸ“…︎ Jun 07 2019
🚨︎ report
What happened to frog who parked illegally?

... He got toad

πŸ‘︎ 3k
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/JuIius_Seizure95
πŸ“…︎ Aug 03 2018
🚨︎ report
What is a frog's favorite tool?

A ribbit gun.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/atomicramennoodle
πŸ“…︎ Oct 21 2019
🚨︎ report
What happened to the frog's car when it broke down?

It got toad.

πŸ‘︎ 73
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Jackoquack02
πŸ“…︎ Apr 18 2019
🚨︎ report
I parked my car next to a frog reserve...

Apparently it’s illegal so my car got toad away.

πŸ‘︎ 15
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Ruminino
πŸ“…︎ Jul 06 2019
🚨︎ report
What does a frog say when you ask how deep the water is?

Kneedeep, Kneedeep

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call a depressed frog?

Unhoppy.

πŸ‘︎ 33
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bearinthegarden14
πŸ“…︎ Jun 28 2019
🚨︎ report
What happened to the frog who parked by a fire hydrant?

He was toad away.

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Tanski14
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2019
🚨︎ report
A woman walks into a doctor's office with a frog on her head. Slightly taken aback, he tells her to sit and asks, "What would happen to be your ailment?"

"Well doc, there would appear to be a woman stuck to my butt."

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/honolulu_oahu_mod
πŸ“…︎ Oct 14 2019
🚨︎ report
Why are frogs so happy?

Because they eat whatever bugs them

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheYonko27
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2019
🚨︎ report
Kermit The Frog was struggling with addiction

He was struggling with crack-croakain

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/DuctapeCat
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2019
🚨︎ report
Why are frogs always happy

They eat whatever bugs them

πŸ‘︎ 22
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Mega_Nibba
πŸ“…︎ Jul 13 2019
🚨︎ report
What do frogs do with paper?

β€œRippit Rippit”

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheYonko27
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2019
🚨︎ report
What does Henry the Eighth and Kermit the Frog have in common?

The same middle name.

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Sventhedropbear
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2019
🚨︎ report
How did the frog feel when he hurt his leg?

Unhoppy

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TheYonko27
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2019
🚨︎ report
What do you call an illegally parked frog?

Towed.

πŸ‘︎ 420
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Nashvillan615
πŸ“…︎ Sep 18 2018
🚨︎ report
What does the internet loving frog say?

Reddit

πŸ‘︎ 29
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/TicTacGuacodile
πŸ“…︎ Aug 04 2019
🚨︎ report
Kermeat the Frog
πŸ‘︎ 11
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/AristonD
πŸ“…︎ Jun 16 2019
🚨︎ report
What did the frog say at the condom product development meeting?

Ribbit

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 22 2019
🚨︎ report
So a frog walks into a bank

So a frog walks into a bank, and up to one of the tellers, a young woman by the name of Patricia Wakk. He says to her, he says, β€œMiss Wakk, my name is Kermit Jagger, son of Mick Jagger, and I’d like to take out a loan. I make porcelain elephants,” he says, pulling one out from his pocket, β€œand I’d like to open a store down on Main Street selling them. I just need a few thousand dollars to buy the shop. Can you help me out?”

Now, Patricia doesn’t normally deal in small business loans, so she’s unsure on the proper protocol involved, so she calls over her manager and explains the situation to him, explaining Kermit’s family ties and showing him the elephant, to which her manager replies,

β€œIt’s a knick-nack, Patty Wakk, give the frog a loan! His old man’s a rolling stone.”

πŸ‘︎ 6
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Jul 01 2019
🚨︎ report
What is the difference between a cat and a frog?

A cat has 9 lives, but a frog croaks every day!

πŸ‘︎ 8
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Numpkins
πŸ“…︎ Aug 19 2019
🚨︎ report
How do depressed frogs die?

They Kermit suicide!

πŸ‘︎ 4
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/professorf
πŸ“…︎ May 27
🚨︎ report
What do you call an illegally parked frog?

Toad.

πŸ‘︎ 32
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Mar 06
🚨︎ report
What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?

It gets toad.

πŸ‘︎ 72
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 16 2019
🚨︎ report
What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?

It gets toad.

πŸ‘︎ 93
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Oct 30 2019
🚨︎ report
What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.

πŸ‘︎ 69
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/bjs1023113
πŸ“…︎ Nov 04 2019
🚨︎ report
What happens when frogs park illegally?

They get toad.

πŸ‘︎ 54
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/Leoninator123
πŸ“…︎ Sep 16 2019
🚨︎ report
What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?

It gets toad.

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/notdadbot
πŸ“…︎ Nov 02 2019
🚨︎ report
How do you tell the difference between a frog and a horny toad?

A frog says, "Ribbit, ribbit" and a horny toad says, "Rub it, rub it.”

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/saforester
πŸ“…︎ Oct 05 2019
🚨︎ report
What happens to a frog's car when it breaks down?

It gets toad!

πŸ‘︎ 2
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/One_Day_Dead
πŸ“…︎ Sep 26 2019
🚨︎ report
What kind of shoes do frogs wear?

Open toad

πŸ‘︎ 7
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/LilCuntBoyXD
πŸ“…︎ Aug 22 2019
🚨︎ report

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.