Pun Request: Foot
I need to write a bit about "digital footprints" for a class.
I figured I should throw a few foot puns in to spice things up.
However, soon I found that trouble was afoot.
I'm starting to run dry and am close to being dead on my feet.
Can I get a few extra hands (and feet) to throw in some ideas?
Toe/heel/knee puns also welcome.
True story: I was a kid, watching TV in our living room. My dad was outside using the grill. All of a sudden he bursts in the door hopping on one foot yelling “I stepped on a Bee!”
I was so concerned I jumped up and ran over to him...
Earlier that day my friend and I who were really into mountain biking had been using really sticky letters to put our names on our bikes. We were working near the general area of the BBQ.
Apparently I had dropped one...
Stuck to the bottom of my dads foot was the letter B....
A legendary dad joke from a legendary dad.
Big Foot is sometimes confused for Sasquatch
what did the cell say when it’s sister stepped on it’s foot
If a Dog Has a Prosthetic Foot,
Athletes get athlete's foot. What do astronauts get?
I heard that a gang based in Los Angeles is creating paper money with pictures of the founder's foot's digits in place of presidents...
I dunno if the Crip-toe currency will take off or not.
My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."
Did you know athlete’s foot is only in the US?
The rest of the world calls it athlete’s meter
What's a foot surgeon's favorite gum?
What do foot fetishists eat for snak?
Has anyone actually ever seen Big Foot?
I got the word “Ouch” tattooed on the back of my foot yesterday. My dad asked me if it still hurts.
I told him yes, but it’ll heel.
why is it a bad idea to iron your rabbits foot?
You shouldn't press your luck
What’s a foot’s favorite month?
What’s a foot’s favorite month?
March
My six-year-old son made that up.
My whole life I thought Chewbacca was an Ewok....
I dropped a hot fudge sundae on my foot
I was midway between the bow and the stern of my 120 foot yacht when suddenly I was surrounded by submarines that just surfaced...
How do you measure a king’s foot?
What has five toes but isn't your foot?
My foot.
Edit: Thanks a lot guys for the awards and upvotes. ;) :)
Taking a picture of big foot is no small feat.
What is a foot long and slippery?
Did you know Shakespeare had a brother who was a foot soldier in the military?
He would get so nervous before battle that he couldn't keep his hands from shaking. The say he wielded quite the shaky-spear.
If the arch of your foot keeps hurting and there's nothing you can do about it...
Does that make it your... arch nemesis?
Foot warmers are really misnamed
Shouldn’t they be called Toesters?
What did the chemist say when he dropped a bar of gold on his foot?
I ran into my nephew yesterday and said, “Wow! You must have grown a foot since I saw you last.”
He said, “Nope. Still have two.”
A tub of margarine fell on my foot 3 weeks a go and it still hurts.....
I can't believe it's not better.
I dropped a slice of meat on my foot today.
My friend lost the front part of his foot. Now I don’t like him anymore.
I’m lack-toes intolerant.
There was once a king who was only 12 inches tall!
Terrible king, but made a great ruler.
What is made of leather, a foot long and sounds like a sneeze?
What’s the best way to transport a giant foot?
Why can’t a nose be 12 inches?
Cuz then it would be a foot
We had a foot of snow outside today.
I don’t know who made it or who put it there, but the craftsmanship is amazing.
Authorities are searching for a four-foot tall woman who recently escaped from prison in upstate New York. She was serving a five year sentence for fraud after convincing a number of victims that she was a powerful psychic.
Now she's a small medium at large.
Going to the foot doctor tomorrow.
Don't often think about my feet. They are usually the furthest thing from my mind.
When my grandparents came over they said: “You look like you’ve grown a foot!”
I looked down to my feet, looked back up, and told them: “No, I still have just two.”
I got the word “Ouch” tattooed on the back of my foot yesterday. My son asked me if it still hurts.
I told him yes, but it’ll heel.
What did the cell say when his sister stepped on his foot?
What did the cell say when it’s sister stepped on it’s foot
My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."
My son accidentally smashed his foot on the table and as he was hopping around the room screaming in pain, I rushed to the phone, picked it up and asked him, "Do you want me to call..."
A tub of margarine fell on my foot three weeks ago and it still hurts.
I can’t believe it’s not better.
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