My girlfriend said she'll leave me if I don't support Trump.

I said okay... Bi den.

πŸ‘︎ 19k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/nikhillala7
πŸ“…︎ Oct 11 2020
🚨︎ report
I went to the first meeting of my premature ejaculator’s support group this morning..

Turns out it’s tomorrow.

πŸ‘︎ 34
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πŸ‘€︎ u/jo3p-
πŸ“…︎ Dec 17 2020
🚨︎ report
Need to ask somebody to support you?

Just column.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/DENelson83
πŸ“…︎ Jan 04
🚨︎ report
We got a new air mattress but it was too lumpy. We called customer support, very angry, demanding our money back!

They said we were blowing it out of proportion.

πŸ‘︎ 21
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Sir_Pluses
πŸ“…︎ Dec 21 2020
🚨︎ report
Please support my onlyfrans! only-frans.com/irishguy
πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dealonmusk
πŸ“…︎ Dec 03 2020
🚨︎ report
Mac now supports Windows
πŸ‘︎ 78
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πŸ‘€︎ u/fatherjon05
πŸ“…︎ Oct 22 2020
🚨︎ report
Yes! I support nouns

I'm pro nouns.

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Alkedi44
πŸ“…︎ Dec 22 2020
🚨︎ report
The US Navy will start to equip all their subs with emotional support dogs. After a lot study, they decided on Dachshunds...

...they will be subma-weiners.

πŸ‘︎ 104
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πŸ‘€︎ u/KW-DadJoker
πŸ“…︎ Oct 24 2020
🚨︎ report
Algebra teachers support change in the world...

Because they love radicals.

(Sorry if this has been done before, this is my first post on this sub)

πŸ‘︎ 4
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Big-Main
πŸ“…︎ Dec 16 2020
🚨︎ report
Where do people attend support groups for arachnophobes?

On the web

πŸ‘︎ 6
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Kippergills
πŸ“…︎ Nov 15 2020
🚨︎ report
I've been trying to come up with a clever name for an amputee support group.

But so far, I'm stumped.

πŸ‘︎ 241
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WulliesTime
πŸ“…︎ Jul 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the city support the music hall being repurposed as a shopping mall?

Harmonic Re-zone-ance

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ“…︎ Sep 22 2020
🚨︎ report
I support free speech

Nobody should have to pay to talk.

πŸ‘︎ 39
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Zipped102
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Show support for his hard work
πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/glock_muncher
πŸ“…︎ Aug 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Support your farmers
πŸ‘︎ 50
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Tarlungs110466
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2020
🚨︎ report
How will he support his 3mm family?
πŸ‘︎ 4k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ohsureyoudo
πŸ“…︎ Dec 25 2019
🚨︎ report
"We're here to offer support, not to grill you," they said at my review meeting.

"Like a bra, not a braai"

  • Based on true events. I had to stop myself from blurting that out.

  • Thanks to u/rumbustiousben for reminding me that not everyone knows what a braai is - it's a barbecue in Afrikaans and commonly used as part of English by South Africans

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/wcsoon
πŸ“…︎ Sep 02 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked my boss if he would donate to my organization that provides medical support to Asian children with terminal diseases so they don’t have to be put down.

He hasn’t responded yet, but when he does I’ll find out if he supports youth in Asia.

πŸ‘︎ 3
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πŸ‘€︎ u/srirachase
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
Why would Karl Marx support closing schools because of COVID-19?

We'd finally live in a classless society.

πŸ‘︎ 10
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Friday2day
πŸ“…︎ Jul 27 2020
🚨︎ report
My horse never supports anything I want to do.

He's such a neigh-sayer.

πŸ‘︎ 47
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πŸ‘€︎ u/CIMMGW
πŸ“…︎ Jul 02 2020
🚨︎ report
Why are the members of the Titanic survivors’ support group so close?

Everyone was in same boat.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/_adamnguyen
πŸ“…︎ Jul 20 2020
🚨︎ report
What animal do French women wear to give them support?

Zebra

πŸ‘︎ 20
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πŸ‘€︎ u/WhatTheHosenHey
πŸ“…︎ Jun 11 2020
🚨︎ report
The true support that Windows needed...
πŸ‘︎ 184
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Deb_Eternity
πŸ“…︎ Dec 30 2019
🚨︎ report
Has anyone asked IT for support?

They deal with viruses all the time!

πŸ‘︎ 29
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πŸ‘€︎ u/harpostyleupvotes
πŸ“…︎ Mar 20 2020
🚨︎ report
If you're having trouble connecting your bluetooth device, just dress in green, sit on a perch and repeat everything that tech support tells you.

It's the only way to parrot.

πŸ‘︎ 9
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πŸ‘€︎ u/OK_Compooper
πŸ“…︎ Jun 18 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the blind German mistakenly support Hitler?

He thought he was a fellow member of the Not See Party.

πŸ‘︎ 42
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Miketar85
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2020
🚨︎ report
What did I say when my son tried to unplug my life support to plug in the vacuum cleaner?

Don't do that I'll dyson!

πŸ‘︎ 5
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Dinsy_Crow
πŸ“…︎ May 21 2020
🚨︎ report
I joined a support group for former computer hackers.

Anonymous Anonymous.

πŸ‘︎ 86
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πŸ‘€︎ u/radioclash86
πŸ“…︎ Feb 26 2020
🚨︎ report
Dad, which state supports baking as a family activity?

Whisk on, son.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/shouldExist
πŸ“…︎ May 10 2020
🚨︎ report
I absolutely support any scientific effort to create an invisibility cloak.

I just want to make myself clear.

πŸ‘︎ 64
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πŸ‘€︎ u/porichoygupto
πŸ“…︎ Dec 06 2019
🚨︎ report
I was having trouble with my computer, so I contacted IT support. The man said, 'Have you tried disabling cookies?'

I said, 'Well, I once bit the legs off a gingerbread man.'

πŸ‘︎ 47
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πŸ“…︎ Dec 26 2019
🚨︎ report
Why did the electrician support LGBTQ people a lot?

Because he had a lot of trans sisters

πŸ‘︎ 109
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πŸ‘€︎ u/AcidReign999
πŸ“…︎ Oct 19 2019
🚨︎ report
Tesla just started production of medical gear to support hospital workers...

The Elon Mask is their first product.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/warpedddd
πŸ“…︎ Mar 22 2020
🚨︎ report
My daughter was getting older and needed a new support group...

So my wife helped her be fitted for some very nice bras.

πŸ‘︎ 2
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Apr 10 2020
🚨︎ report
Why did the Magic 8-ball call tech support?

Outlook not good.

πŸ‘︎ 7
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πŸ‘€︎ u/RuroniHS
πŸ“…︎ Mar 15 2020
🚨︎ report
Halloween Support Group
πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/dufosho
πŸ“…︎ Oct 18 2018
🚨︎ report
I used to upholster furniture for a living and hated it. My boss switched me to packing for a while then switched me back. I hate it so bad I have to go to a support group. Talking helps me to do the damned job.

I'm in recovery.

πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/thomasbrakeline
πŸ“…︎ Feb 28 2020
🚨︎ report
Mac now supports Windows
πŸ‘︎ 65
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πŸ‘€︎ u/NoodleSlayer008
πŸ“…︎ Jul 28 2019
🚨︎ report
A spider called a tech support office

He needed help connecting to the web

πŸ‘︎ 5
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ Feb 09 2020
🚨︎ report
Tech support
πŸ‘︎ 8
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πŸ‘€︎ u/theratrules
πŸ“…︎ Oct 01 2019
🚨︎ report
I like dillos, but do not support giving them guns.

I would never armadillo.

πŸ‘︎ 2k
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πŸ‘€︎ u/ThePoeticElixir
πŸ“…︎ Jul 12 2018
🚨︎ report
At last I found some concrete IT support

https://i.imgur.com/xKsNWyA.png

πŸ‘︎ 91
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πŸ‘€︎ u/Seppoteurastaja
πŸ“…︎ Oct 07 2019
🚨︎ report
I am unable to support the "fat-acceptance" movement

Because they're too heavy

πŸ‘︎ 22
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πŸ‘€︎ u/SaxyCat
πŸ“…︎ Sep 09 2019
🚨︎ report
This morning I went to a meeting of my premature ejaculators’ support group

But it turns out that it’s tomorrow

πŸ‘︎ 3
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/lolyfe-dc
πŸ“…︎ Nov 25 2020
🚨︎ report
I asked my boss to donate to support Asian children with terminal illnesses.

He hasn’t responded yet, but when he does I’ll find out if he supports youth in Asia.

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ‘€︎ u/srirachase
πŸ“…︎ Aug 11 2020
🚨︎ report
I went to my premature ejaculation support group today...

Turns out it's tomorrow

πŸ‘︎ 17
πŸ’¬︎
πŸ“…︎ May 06 2020
🚨︎ report

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