"For cough" She growled. "Alright love, I only asked." I replied.
It's a reptile dysfunction.
A woman went into a bar in Waco and saw a cowboy with his feet propped up on a table. He had the biggest boots she'd ever seen. The woman asked him if it's true what they say about men with big feet being well endowed.
The cowboy grinned and said, "Shore is, little lady. Why don't you come on out to the bunkhouse and let me prove it to you?"
The woman wanted to find out for herself, so she spent the night with him. The next morning she handed him a $100 bill.
Blushing, he said, "Well, thankee, ma'am. Ah'm real flattered. Ain't nobody ever paid me for mah services before."
"Don't be flattered," she said. "Take the money and buy yourself some boots that fit."
“No, shit, Sherlock.”
John left large shoes to Phil.
It’s his spare veal
The shop owner told me to take a hike.
The instructor said he'd never even seen me in the classroom.
Carbon dyed ox hide.
It was an assisted shoe-icide
Holmes: "Is that comforter on your bed?" Watson: "No, sheet, Sherlock"
Holmes: "Is that a long note on your desk?" Watson: "No, chit, Sherlock"
Holmes: "Is that your residence?" Watson: "No, shed, Sherlock"
That's why I'm still carrying around these huge daddy-shoes.
Turns out these boots are made for Joaquin.
I said, My foot, officer
needless to say, shawty got l'eau
I told her that it sounded like a decision that came from a Petty Officer.
Dad:I need new boots. Me:Why? DAD:one of them isn’t right. HAHAHA. Me:😣
It's called an Astro knot
Many of them had to be put on a wading list.
He replied, “Well I don’t know where yours are, I only have one...
I picked it up and started caressing it with my hand making crooning noises.
Wife: What are you doing?
Me: Just feeling the wonderful curves of your booty.
It's a boutonniere. My mom's boyfriend graced me with this one.
They have a reptile dysfunction.
I guess you can say it's a boot a boot
Me- "Are you wearing my boots?"
Dad- "Yeah, sorry. I couldn't find mine this morning."
Me- "It's alright, please don't break them."
Dad- "I'm walking all over them."
Dad-joked a co-worker today at the airport. note, boots is a shop.
co-worker: why is there 2 boots right next to each other?
me: one for each foot
edit: a word & formatting
This is my first Dad Joke I have ever done! We were driving home after a trip to Costco and my Mother points out a Cosmo Booth (Glamour shot Photo booth) outside. Mom: Look at that Cosmo Booth! Do you want a picture taken Brother? Brother: What's a Cosmo Boot? Me: Its like Moon Boots only bigger. Only me and my Mother laughed. Everyone else didn't get the joke!