Footwear Puns

A list of puns related to "Footwear"

This run of footwear puns is glorious. thecolbertreport.cc.com/v…
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👤︎ u/lmxbftw
📅︎ Sep 22 2014
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What is Cruella de Vil's favorite brand of footwear?

Hush Puppies

👍︎ 4
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👤︎ u/arunphilip
📅︎ Dec 27 2020
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What sorts of footwear do bakers wear?

Choux-es and loaf-ers.

👍︎ 3
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👤︎ u/SteadyingRuck
📅︎ Nov 10 2020
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It’s weird- I can’t help but talk about footwear every time I sneeze.

ah...Ah...AH-SHOE!

👍︎ 9
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👤︎ u/LaChuteQuiMarche
📅︎ Sep 30 2020
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Marathon runners with bad footwear

suffer the agony of defeat.

👍︎ 23
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👤︎ u/Rav4xle
📅︎ Jun 15 2020
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My doc seems to think I either have a wizard or orthopedic footwear...

He said I have mage or healthy shoes.

👍︎ 4
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👤︎ u/Sir-Danksalot
📅︎ Jul 25 2020
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What kind of benefits do footwear company employees get?

Sock options

👍︎ 6
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👤︎ u/SwansonsMom
📅︎ Apr 08 2020
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I'm thinkning about opening a hotel that also sells footwear.

I think it would be a real Shoe Inn.

👍︎ 5
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👤︎ u/DLeck
📅︎ Mar 22 2020
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My friend Phil wore my dad's footwear yesterday

but his Shoes were too big to phil

👍︎ 5
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👤︎ u/cmbhatt
📅︎ Apr 08 2020
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What do you get when you cross the flu with footwear?

Aaaa shoe!

👍︎ 13
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👤︎ u/tyrannosaur85
📅︎ Jan 22 2020
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What is a nut's favourite footwear?

Cashews

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👤︎ u/necroplasmic
📅︎ Jan 09 2020
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What kind of footwear is the hardest to walk in?

Slippers.

👍︎ 11
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👤︎ u/fatpieceofbread
📅︎ Aug 22 2019
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Technically we're all third wheeling our footwear

You could say they're your sole mates

👍︎ 8
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👤︎ u/one_panj_man
📅︎ Oct 17 2019
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I couldn't decide what footwear to put on this morning.

I have too many to shoes from.

👍︎ 7
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👤︎ u/Chrlie_947
📅︎ Aug 25 2019
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I invented beach footwear for people with one leg.

It was a flop.

👍︎ 22
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👤︎ u/FinalCaveat
📅︎ Jul 10 2019
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What is a burglar's favorite kind of footwear?

Sneakers.

👍︎ 5
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👤︎ u/SteadyingRuck
📅︎ Apr 18 2019
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On the way to a nice meal with my wife discussing our choice of footwear

Wife: I wish I had worn my boots but I think the restaurant is a little dressier than that.

Me: I don’t think so... I almost wore my sandals.

Wife: That would have been vetoed.

Me: No, that would have been open toed.

👍︎ 6
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👤︎ u/KennethPowersIII
📅︎ Jan 19 2019
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I'm going to start a line of footwear to market to exotic dancers.

They're called Daddy Is-Shoes.

👍︎ 5
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👤︎ u/QuestionMarkyMark
📅︎ Jul 02 2018
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What's a ghosts favorite Footwear?

Boo-ts

👍︎ 13
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👤︎ u/10111001110
📅︎ Nov 01 2017
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If someone made a holiday for footwear...

I’d be socked!

👍︎ 3
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👤︎ u/_solidwarp_
📅︎ Oct 25 2018
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What do you call a piece of footwear that you bring home with you from vacation?

A shoevenir

👍︎ 4
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👤︎ u/LakituGames
📅︎ Jul 17 2018
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What kind of footwear do nuts wear?

Cashews

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👤︎ u/2076baseballbat
📅︎ Apr 25 2018
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What do you tell annoying footwear so that it will go away?

You tell it to shoe.

👍︎ 9
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👤︎ u/xx_das_shame_xx
📅︎ Jan 23 2017
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A friend of my dad's got caught in a rough situation in a footwear outlet

Friend: Ugh, I was just in there to buy a new pair of sneakers. I didn't need to know the life story of that guy and why he was robbing the store, you know?

Dad: Friend, I love your shoes. ...But I wouldn't want to be in your shoes

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👤︎ u/Madmagican-
📅︎ Mar 12 2017
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I know how you feel about my compulsion to mention edible footwear,

but could we taco boot it later?

👍︎ 11
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👤︎ u/MrWonderland18
📅︎ Sep 20 2013
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